STANDERS UNITE! [Archive] - RonFez.net Messageboard

Pootertoot

05-02-2001, 09:22 AM

I am a stander, always have been. It's because I have bathroom OCD, and don't feel clean the other way. I stand and wipe until I'm fully clean by my standards, or until there's blood on the toilet paper. I go so far as to wet a piece of toilet paper and follow it up with a dry one. I look like a Circ du Soleil act with all the acrobatics and leg stretching I do.

I am a fully functioning individual otherwise, except for my penchant for killing hobos.

angrymissy

05-02-2001, 09:28 AM

I "hover" i can never actually sit on any toilet seat besides my own, even if there are those little paper thingees to put over the seat. And I always use those Cottenelle wet wipes things. Theyre GREAT!

AMB

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Pootertoot

05-02-2001, 09:31 AM

I'm flattered that someone such as Angry Missy Baby would reply to my post.

But I just wanted to add I do it fully naked, too, because there's always the outside chance that the shirt will swing into the ass crack and get some turdage on it.

Now I've made sure someone like Missy will never respond to my posts again ;P

sandman

05-02-2001, 09:50 AM

thats just gross how the heck can you stand and poop am i the only one who needs to read a newspaper during the dookin

Vegeto

05-02-2001, 09:56 AM

It makes sense to stand! If you want to be totally clean, you'd better stand up and handle your buisness right!

You may not like me, But you will learn to love me!

soup

05-02-2001, 12:39 PM

Hell yeah, I have to read
something during crunchtime.
It's the only peaceful time I
get.

see more evil, hear more evil,
speak more evil

angrymissy

05-02-2001, 01:32 PM

pootertoot,

i dont think im that cool! besides i could disgust you with my talk of poo. my friends are always asking me to STOP talking about my poo habits

AMB

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sunndoggy8

05-02-2001, 06:25 PM

Dan, I read your article and it made some good points..but what about for the "poop on the run" or better know as the public bathroom experience...is there anything that is made for the man who has to use public facilities often?

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The Blowhard

05-02-2001, 07:30 PM

What's the big deal about poop? Hell, I can eat on the toilet!;)

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Pootertoot

05-02-2001, 07:49 PM

Missy, then we share a common bond...I violate my friends with poo talk all the time. It is INCREDIBLY hard to disgust me.

If it weren't for Al Dukes being in the club, I'd say that Standers universally have to be cool, because they're forced to look at their own shit, while sitters/squatters can just flush it away, paying it no mind. And anyone that can stand to stare at their own poo all the time is cool in my books.

bigfoot

05-03-2001, 02:01 AM

hey missy i cangt believe a beautiful woman like your self would talk about poop

please dont post anything like that i beg of u.

it is bad enough coming from
pootertoot.

it makes me a little sick to read posts about poop
i just threw my breakfast in the fucking garbage now. some one here owes me a breakfast.
it is fuking 6am and i amfucking hungry or atleast i was till i read the poop

oh yea and dan i enjoy listening to your obscure references from instant feedback but i cant bring myself to check out that article you wrote for foundry
sorry yo.

The Blowhard

05-03-2001, 05:18 AM

Why does a discussion of fecal matter upset so many people? And remember, when you wash your hands in a bathroom, you stll have to touch the doorknob when leaving. Millions and millions of germs on that one doorknob! The same goes for payphones, restaurants and hotels. We are all contaminated!

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LtBoogaloo

05-03-2001, 05:23 AM

This is why I never touch doorknobs or payphones unless absolutely necessary...and even after that I do scrub my hands.

I have always been a stander, although I have always considered myself a fastidious clean-freak in regards to my rear end.

I'll have to investigate these Cottonelle products.

sarah says I'm a badass

angrymissy

05-03-2001, 06:02 AM

Heckler - that whole thing with the doorknob being dirty - that thought finally came to me when I was visiting my grandfather in a VA hospital. I used the public bathroom then looked at the door and thought "old people germs". As OCD as it sounds, I now grab a paper towel and use that to touch the doorknob.

Anyone who doesn't use Cottenelle is missing out. One of my friends was grocery shopping with me once and I put them in the cart and she said "ewww those are gross". People might laugh at you, but you'll be smug in knowing that your asscrack is cleaner than theirs!

As for poo talk - I've tried to stop. It makes me feel like an old fart when I'm sitting around with my girlfriends and were talking about how regular we are. Pass the Metamucil!

AMB

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Pootertoot

05-03-2001, 06:19 AM

I hope this doesn't post twice. I typed a lengthy discourse on Poo and for some reason it didn't go through. So here we go again. (I'm getting paid to work, you say? PSHAW!)

Don't you talk bad about us pootalkers. We're the ones who keep the bathrooms clean. If it weren't for the people forced to look at their poo and the seat, every bathroom would look like Thunderdome, a post-apocalyptic wasteland run by a midget on a giant retard's back.

Heckler, I feel your pain. Here at work, when I'm forced to use the bathroom for one reason another, it more often than not looks like a rabid bear wandered in to take a dump before I got there. There's often a forest of short and curlies on the seat, which keeps me constantly on the lookout for which of my coworkers is shedding. They like to leave little momentos, reminders of their bathroom visit, be it pee on the seat, a dallop of Hershey's Chunky-Style, a whole nutlog, or a used tampon, there's always something waiting to be discovered. And when time comes to leave the bathroom, the doorknob is sometimes WET AND STICKY. I would love to say this is from them washing their hands, but anyone who isn't vigilant enough to realize they're shedding huge chunks of pubic hair will probably leave the bathroom looking like they just tried to get the last pudding out of the bowl.

So be kind to your standers, your pootalkers, for they are the ones that keep you from sitting on a toilet seat and sliding off because of a mud puddle.

Missy, you rock, don't ever change.

And remember, you can always pick those nuts out and eat 'em again. They weren't digested the first time, and this time they've got a candy coating!

The Blowhard

05-03-2001, 07:47 AM

Dan hit it right on the head!
I never had a fear of germs, and I just finally got around to rinsing out my coffe mug.
I believe that personal hygiene is important, but admit it guys...how many of you wash your hands in the men's room if there is nobody else in there?
AMB..ever see a German "scat film"? You will laugh your ass off!;)

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Pootertoot

05-03-2001, 07:49 AM

I'm not a germaphobe, I just don't want cranky ass.

Of course I don't wash my hands if no one else is there...if my dick isn't clean enough that I don't need to wash my hands after holding it, then something's wrong. Do you wash your hands after touching your arm?

If anyone can hook me up with a German Shit Film clip I'll be glad to share two Japanese girls puking into each other's mouths in a bathtub. It's disgusting, but you just...can't...look...away...

angrymissy

05-03-2001, 08:05 AM

Yes I have seen one. It was in black and white and all in german. The whole movie consisted of this guy trying to poo or puke on a girl. The worst part was when he couldn't poo, then threw up on himself and started crying.

AMB

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The Blowhard

05-03-2001, 08:45 AM

AMB..you can buy them in the West Village. I had a crazy one the utilized enemas. Many of my friends who watched it with me freaked out and were angry. I just laughed:)

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maki

05-03-2001, 09:01 AM

all this talk about poo
no one pays respect too the
great joe p

joe poo rulz

The Blowhard

05-03-2001, 09:40 AM

How do you guys feel about "floaters?"

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Pootertoot

05-03-2001, 09:42 AM

Depends...if they're mine, I've heard that they indicate a high fat content in the diet and take it as a hint perhaps it's time to lay off the Samoan Girl Scout Cookies.

If it's someone else's...well, if I have to pee, I'll try and sink it with my urine stream. It's kind of like Missle Command, or Asteroids...You can either break it into pieces, or try and keep it down as long as possible.

It's fun, try it.

The Blowhard

05-03-2001, 10:19 AM

Been there, done that! LOL

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Se7en

05-03-2001, 07:38 PM

Just to toss in my two cents, there's nothing more satisfying than taking a nice big growler in the morning. And if it's a perfectly formed coil....that's the sign that it will be a beautiful day.

I'm not germophobic, nor do I have OCD, but you CANNOT touch the doorknobs/handles in a public bathroom with your bare hands. I never do. I do the same as AMB--I use a paper towel. Or if I'm wearing long sleeves, perhaps the cuff of my sleeve (I pull the sleeve down so it fits over my hand like a mitt, and open the door that way). My reasoning is this--ever been in a public bathroom, and observed how many people do their business and totally neglect to wash their hands? I ain't touching that knob seconds after it's been handled by someone who was wiping their ass and didn't have the hygiene skills to know and wash afterwards.

All this poo talk makes me miss Joe Poo all that much more.

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The Blowhard

05-04-2001, 10:12 PM

Growler? LOL
This truly is a great thread.
Now what about "skidmarks"? LOL

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Pootertoot

05-05-2001, 09:28 AM

Skidmarks are the mark of a leaner. Though I must admit...

I enjoy cracking a rat now and again, but there's always that 1 in 1,000,000 chance that it'll be a wet fart. It was about six months ago and I was terribly ill...I felt one bubbling up and had to let loose...I did, and instead of the regular sound, I heard "BLOOP", much like I had farted underwater..I ran to the bathroom and looked at what I had done...it looked like someone had dropped pudding from an airplane into my boxers. I couldn't salvage the boxers, nor my dignity.

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sunndoggy8

05-06-2001, 01:31 AM

Wait, am I supposed to feel good or bad for still sucking on quarters?

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angrymissy

05-07-2001, 05:59 AM

I had a scary poo experience this weekend. I pooed and there was corn in it. BUT I DIDN'T EAT ANY CORN! Where is this mystery corn coming from? The poo fairy? Is someone deviously feeding me corn while I'm asleep, or even worse, drugged? This has been bugging me all weekend.

AMB

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Pootertoot

05-07-2001, 06:12 AM

Well, being one of the World's Foremost Experts on Poo, I feel I can offer you my answer...I don't know. People that have never had corn in their lives have been known to spontaneously have corn in their poo. My theory is that it's not actually corn in the poo, but concentrated love. You've just got so much love , you're shitting it.

I do, however, know why you still poo corn if you HAVE eaten corn. Corn is digestable, it's the shells of corn that isn't. So that's just a bunch of corn skins that make your poo look like a Chocolate Rice Krispie.

I also had a bad poo experience this weekend, where I almost died trying to get a turd out, as it felt like I was shitting a porcupine, or a pine cone...I got up, and it was the most disappointing poo ever. It was the Tiny Tim of Poos. At least it was a fighter though.

Lastly, Thank you for all the people who recommended Cottonelle to me, as I tried it this weekend, and it's like wiping my ass with Jesus.

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JustJon

05-07-2001, 08:23 AM

Do you think Jesus would appreciate being wiped on your ass?

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Pootertoot

05-07-2001, 08:24 AM

If he knew how good it felt, I'd think so.

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girl germs

05-07-2001, 10:14 AM

pootertwat, you made me choke while drinking orange juice.

now, since everybody is so graciously discussing their poo experiences, i would just like to inform all of you that i got my period this morning. yes, it is true. the lining in my uterus has shed. i am menstruating. hooray! i'm a woman. unfortunately greedy corporations try to profit off our bodies by trying to sell us chemically manufactured products that will keep us fresh and clean. sad.

Pootertoot

05-07-2001, 03:31 PM

I just ate my first two self-boiled corn on the cobs...I will let you all know the results, as I'm sure you'll be on the edge of your seats.

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babychanel

05-09-2001, 09:55 PM

by the way as we all know corn manufactured by the body results in corn in the bowl. Do I say any more, nice post.
lol

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FMJeff

05-09-2001, 11:43 PM

Speaking of columns, are you writing any more, Dan?

Jeff Shain
WebMaster
http://www.foundrymusic.com

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Pootertoot

05-10-2001, 08:00 AM

My poo was corn-free. Oh well, it was all in the name of science.

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Spunk Bubbles

05-10-2001, 08:52 PM

Yo, I called in on that show. I can't believe that people wipe sitting down, what if a log is floating atop? What if your hand hits the water? Whatever latez...

"Choke On It Twatwaffle"

Pootertoot

05-11-2001, 05:50 AM

Spunk Bubbles, what if there's a giant, rabid sewer ratwaiting to burrow into your anus?

There's so many perils that can happen when you blindly stick your hand down into the toilet to wipe your dirty bunghole, not the least of which is possibly leaving yourself with a crusty browneye. Nobody wants to find poo flakes in their ass. Only you can prevent poo flakes.

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The Blowhard

05-13-2001, 09:13 PM

I hate to admit this, but one time at a Jets game at Shea Stadium I had a real bad case of the "dumpsweats", and the stalls were crowded and filthy, so I actually "crunched" in a sink, in front of at least 100 guys. It's great to be tall, and being drunk helped I guess.

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Pootertoot

05-14-2001, 06:52 AM

Heckler, you should start your own religion. I bet you Elron Hubbard never took a dump in a sink.

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angrymissy

05-14-2001, 07:12 AM

Yesterday I was in the KMart in a pretty ghetto section of town. I had to poo. I had to poo bad :(. I didn't want to poo in KMart but I did. the bathroom was the filthiest thing I've ever seen... poo on the floor, bloody tampons on the floor, peepee on the seat. This is a situation where hovering is an ABSOULTE MUST! Its a good thing that I've honed my hovering skills because there was no way in hell I was gonna plop my ass down on that seat! Thats my poo story. Thank you and goodnight.

AMB

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The Blowhard

05-14-2001, 07:49 AM

Great story AMB..sometimes "ya gotta do what ya gotta do". One of the worst places to get the "dumpsweats" is on the NYC Subway. I have ventured down into the tunnels a few times, but I won't get into the details at this time!;)

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Pootertoot

05-14-2001, 08:04 AM

Missy, I had to go in an A&P once when I was young. The bathroom was in the like, third subbasement, past all the migrant workers in the first basement, the dead union bosses in the second, and the precambrian fossils in the third. It was, quite literally, a bucket and a sink. And it seemed to be general consensus that the bucket didn't need to be empty until it was full. I didn't want THAT kind of splashback, so I did what any sane human being would do: shit in the corner.

Heckler, the same goes for Metro North. The wrost smelling car is the car with the bathroom. If you've ever been in there, it looks like something out of "Seven", with shit fingerprints on the walls and ceiling. It looks like someone started peeing and spinning around at the same time. There's usually a homeless guy in the corner commenting on the size of your genitals, too. He wipes for you for a dollar, though, so it works out.

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The Blowhard

05-27-2001, 09:30 PM

Did I hear that Al Dukes is now a "sitter"?

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"Back off Beaver, you little creep"

angrymissy

06-10-2001, 08:43 PM

I couldnt poo for days - then today finally! a poop! this poop was so wide that it took 3 days to come out... i was so proud that i wanted to take a picture, i tried to show it to my boyfriends sister - but she was disgusted :)

AMB

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Bob D.

06-11-2001, 07:07 AM

pootertoot i feel your pain when you had to go into the A&P but you only had to see that once.... you may not believe me but i had to go through that for most of my life.... i lived in a house with no running water at all... in the bathroom we had one of those 5 gal. buckets with a seat on it, the sink wasnt used in years and the bath tub was storage space.

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You my not like it... But you will learn to love it !!!!

Pootertoot

06-11-2001, 07:53 AM

Bob D, are you from Appalachia? If so, you rock the big ass...that "American Hollow" special was hysterical.

There's really no updates on the poo front. It's business as usual. I have taken to putting my foot up on the sink while wiping myself, so I can actually get inside my large intestine to wipe that.

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angrymissy

06-11-2001, 12:31 PM

My poo has been fucking with me :(. All day today I have had the "phantom shits" I feel like poo is going to cascade out of my butt then.. NOTHIN! cramps too... this sucks

AMB

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Pootertoot

06-11-2001, 07:34 PM

Only thing worse than that is when you're ready for a massive shit, you go through the rigors, pushin it out like you're giving birth to a baby elephant, then wipe the sweat from your brow and survey the fruit of your labor...AND IT'S JUST A COUPLE NUGGETS. Nothing impressive. You expected to see a goddamn anaconda, you get a couple Butterfinger BBs. That sucks ass.

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HordeKing1

06-11-2001, 08:16 PM

POOTERTOOT - Papa Freud would suggest an anal retentive fixation coupled with a contradictory obsessive need to clense yourself througoughly of the waste product that is produced.

Only one conclusion. Your mom must be a really frighteningly scary evil clown!

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Pootertoot

06-11-2001, 08:23 PM

To Freud I say, Sometimes a cigar is just a big brown turd.

As for my mother, nah..just a big fat crack whore who likes intrauterine snuggling with her oldest son.

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The Blowhard

06-21-2001, 09:15 PM

This may be the thread of the year!

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The Blowhard

06-21-2001, 10:03 PM

Hey, it's summer! Can anybody get me some of that Jersey Sweet Corn?

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Pootertoot

06-22-2001, 02:11 PM

I think I may have tapeworms. My shitting is minimal lately.

But what is there is like melted chocolate. It's like an hour's worth of wiping...I've got my own Willy Wonka chocolate lake between my buttcheeks.

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The Blowhard

06-29-2001, 09:48 AM

Another "Best Of" thread!

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angrymissy

06-29-2001, 09:50 AM

oOoOoOo my favorite thread! i also think it was one of Pootertoots firsts!

lets talk poop.

AMB

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Pootertoot

06-29-2001, 10:36 AM

Yes, 'twas feces that popped my board cherry.

I made some corn on the cob to go with my Pork Chops Ole (I'm not gay, I swear) and what did I find during my morning shit?

A fabulous gold-studded log! It looked like some pirate had festooned my turd with tiny gold dubloons, and it floated happily in Davy Jones' Crapper...

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The Blowhard

06-29-2001, 09:29 PM

Did you know that if you eat a lot of Tums your poop turns beige...similar to soft coffee ice cream. It's the calcium.

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Pootertoot

06-29-2001, 11:00 PM

I usually just paint mine and hide them on Easter.

"Mommy, these eggs are mushy..."

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The Blowhard

07-02-2001, 08:22 AM

I was at a friends house recently and while in the bathroom I saw a HUGE can of Lysol. Is that really necessary?

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Pootertoot

07-03-2001, 09:09 AM

Anyone ever have a "Swamp Bubble"? I'm fairly sure I'm coining this turn now, if I'm not call me on it.

I've only gotten it when I'm very sick...it's a lot like a wet fart, except you know that it's coming. A wet fart is a regular fart that afterwards, you find a bit of pudding in your pants.

The swamp bubble is the fart that you push out...you can physically feel it welling up like a bubble, and by then it's too late...you know something's coming out, you can't pull it back in...then it pops, and you've got swampwater all over yourself. It's not fun.

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The Blowhard

07-04-2001, 09:57 PM

What about when you drop some major mud and you wipe and you walk away and then you just realized that you have to go again? I hate when that happens.

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erinmoran

07-05-2001, 12:24 AM

I walked into my bathroom that i share with my roommate and discovered something that resembles buttmudd on the floor near the terlet, on the bowl handle, on the tank, and on the shower wall...what should i do!!

My roommates such a fag too...

<img src="http://www.sitcomsonline.com/jlcpage1sm.jpg" height=120width=120

Im still a cutie....and please pass the jelly......

The Blowhard

07-05-2001, 10:41 AM

Hey new members..read this and barf!

http://members.aol.com/slipknot4twenty/heck.gif
"My dog told me to kill you"

Pootertoot

07-05-2001, 11:00 AM

My cute little thread is being moved more than the Golden Girls' bowels the day they served Prune Juice and Bran Muffins.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/muldermanx/images/tardpower2.gif">
This Sig is Temporary, while the REAL 1000 Post Spectacular Sig is Pending Litigation.

The Blowhard

07-05-2001, 11:14 AM

Today's "Best Of" has given this classic new life.
Please don't change Toot, stay the way you are, please??

http://members.aol.com/slipknot4twenty/heck.gif
"My dog told me to kill you"

The Blowhard

08-04-2001, 11:39 PM

bottom. ha ha, get it?

http://members.aol.com/slipknot4twenty/heck.gif

adolescentmasturbator

08-04-2001, 11:50 PM

No, I don't.

I will get a sig pic...eventually

Gvac

08-05-2001, 05:41 AM

First off, let me say that
only a true barbarian would
attempt to cleanse their anal
area while remaining seated.
How fucking lazy can you get?

Second, if you had to dump on
the floor and then pick it up
with your bare hands, would
you merely wipe your hands off
with a piece of paper? Of
course not, you revolting
savage. You would (hopefully)
use plenty of warm water and
soap, until you were satisfied
that you were COMPLETELY
clean. Why should your ass be
any different? Right. It
shouldn't.

Finally, let me inform you all
that I am in posession of an
audio tape I made several
years ago that contains all
the amazing and frightening
sounds of diarrhea and
vomiting, as well as in depth
color commentary by yours
truly. I'm letting you all
have first dibs before I put
it up on e-bay.

Let the bidding commence!

Steamrolling toward 1,000 posts

The Blowhard

08-05-2001, 10:13 AM

Now I'm starvin'!

http://members.aol.com/slipknot4twenty/heck.gif

Pootertoot

08-05-2001, 10:22 AM

I have my first 'roid. I'm naming it Herbert. Do I have to wipe Herbert, too, when I shit now? Can the hobos use it as an anal punching bag when they eat out my ass?

<img src="http://members.aol.com/muldermanx/images/tardpower2.gif">
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EffMeBoobs

08-05-2001, 01:24 PM

I developed Herbert from all those anal fistings. Now, Herbert is my lil sidekick, I flick him when I enter his anus with my fist and Herbert just giggles like the Pillsbury dough boy. You should see him, it's so cute.

[img]http://hometown.aol.com/njhurtgirl/EMB.html[/i
mg]

Pootertoot

08-05-2001, 01:29 PM

He purrs when you touch him.

Herbert shows Ms. Boobs places in my digestive system she's never been able to reach without a guide...

<img src="http://members.aol.com/muldermanx/images/tardpower2.gif">
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EffMeBoobs

08-05-2001, 01:49 PM

Herbert showed me to your appendix the other day. It was quite lovely what I found nestled in there......weebles!

http://hometown.aol.com/njhurtgirl/EMB.html

This message was edited by TheMojoPin on 7-18-04 @ 2:15 AM

The Blowhard

08-21-2001, 02:46 PM

How come only dogs are allowed to go in the streets?

http://members.aol.com/slipknot4twenty/heck.gif

Captain Rooster

08-21-2001, 03:22 PM

What..I shit in the street all the time and to ensure I am clean I scoot like a dog on a rug...but on the curb...

Finally the Roost has come back...
LT Rooster

Captain Rooster

08-21-2001, 03:22 PM

What..I shit in the street all the time and to ensure I am clean I scoot like a dog on a rug...but on the curb...

Finally the Roost has come back...
LT Rooster

Captain Rooster

08-21-2001, 03:22 PM

What..I shit in the street all the time and to ensure I am clean I scoot like a dog on a rug...but on the curb...

Finally the Roost has come back...
LT Rooster

The Blowhard

09-01-2001, 08:57 PM

In celebration of the Toots return I have brought this thread back..one of his best!

http://members.aol.com/slipknot4twenty/heck.gif

IkeaBoy

09-01-2001, 08:59 PM

i don't wipe.

"Nothing can kill The Grimace"

reeshy

09-01-2001, 10:07 PM

I use my girlfriends shirt

<img src=http://www.autobahn.mb.ca/~mustards/manson4.jpg>
WHAT FUCKIN' BEATLE SONG?

reeshy

09-01-2001, 10:08 PM

Sometimes my hair....

<img src=http://www.autobahn.mb.ca/~mustards/manson4.jpg>
WHAT FUCKIN' BEATLE SONG?

Pootertoot

09-02-2001, 09:45 PM

I was on a steady diet of steak and pancakes this vacation, so I'm pretty sure my colon impacted somewhere along the way. I was up to around one shit every two days or so.

Yesterday, however, I took a dump and felt extremely rugged, like a fucking mountain man. This shit was the Marlboro Man of shits. a deep brown with beige striping, it was a noble log, one that would crunch if I bit into it. It had a five o' clock shadow, and if I could craft it a fecal cowboy hat, I would have, so it could wave it in the air as it rode the wave down the pipes. I'm naming him Dally.

Dally, we salute you.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/muldermanx/images/tardpower2.gif">
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reeshy

09-03-2001, 08:38 AM

Pootertoot (or should I say GOD),

You are definately my all-time hero. I just got the hershey squirts from laughing so hard reading that last post.

You are the best!!!!

<img src=http://mrshowbiz.go.com/celebrities/img/gallery/bradpitt_5.jpg>
I'M SUCH A HOMO

Pootertoot

09-03-2001, 09:12 AM

I'm flattered, but don't thank me, thank Dally.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/muldermanx/images/tardpower2.gif">
<center><A HREF=ftp://64.81.192.118>Click Here To Access The Ronfez.net Music Project Server</A></center>

angrymissy

10-02-2001, 01:01 PM

This topic must be revived...

I have been having major poop problems ever since I moved into my new apartment. I can't poop. Then today! whoooooo! At work I let out a tremendous poop! Glory glory hallelujah! Well it was interesting... a bowl full of green liquid with small solid poops floating around in it. Every time I went to pee today, a poop would fall out (I always had this fear that one day i'll be walking away from my desk and a poop will fall out of my butt). I wanted to take a picture of it :D

I'm so lovely!

AMB
<HTML>
<img border="0" src="http://www.rfbabies.com/newsig.jpg" width="300" height="100"> 
JBug555: pas simplement toute blaireau 
JBug555: une blaireau magique 
angrymissybaby1: le hmmmm i ont seulement mystical une blaireau
</HTML>

Gvac

10-02-2001, 01:14 PM

I can fully sympathize with what you must have been going through, Missy. It takes a little while to recognize that new throne as your "home base".
It's always hard to dump in just any old place; you crave the comfort and security of a place you can call your own. Hopefully, now that you have broken the seal, you are well on your way.

Interestingly enough, I also had the desire to photograph my latest movement today, for it was unlike any other I had ever seen. Completely different than yours, though. Mine were akin to Dinosaur dumps. Absolutely massive. Quite impressive, if I do say so myself.

<img src="http://gvac.50megs.com/images/cap.jpg">

Thanks again, WWFallon. You are an American hero.

The Blowhard

11-26-2001, 12:09 AM

Classic.

<embed src="http://hometown.aol.com/slfcallednowhere/heckler.swf" width=300 height=100>

The Blowhard

01-17-2002, 09:37 PM

I stood for the first time tonight. It was one of those "cramps" and I almost didn't make it, so I stood.
Wow, it was really pleasurable. I think I'm officially a stander now. Thanks guys, this thread makes me feel so much better about myself! ;)

"It takes good taste to truly appreciate bad taste"-John Waters

IkeaBoy

01-17-2002, 09:52 PM

I sit a lot but when in high school i liked standing

[/quote]
"My review of 2001 the year is the same as my review of 2001: A Space Odyssey- overlong, hard to follow, and only enjoyable if you're really really stoned." - Lewis Black
"and I spent 14 years as a nuke"- <a href="http://www.capalert.com">CAPALERT</a> Guy on Harry Potter- Reviews, Jesus Style

IkeaBoy

01-17-2002, 09:52 PM

LordJezo

07-16-2004, 07:18 AM

I feel much better now.

Guess more people stand then it seems. Awesome.

------------------------
I KISS YOU!

JohnTolos

07-17-2004, 10:05 PM

LOL POOP!

I AM THE GOLDEN GREEK!

cheezeemee

07-17-2004, 10:09 PM

wtf this thing is really looking like a trainwreck

http://mysite.verizon.net/vze6pk84/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderpictures/gsbh1.jpg
I too dream in color and in rhyme so I guess im one of a kind and thats why my words are heard and confined to the ears of the blind

furie

07-18-2004, 09:19 AM

So, I took a 15 minute crap this morning. My right leg fell asleep. I had to pull myself up using the towel rack.

<img src="http://homepage.mac.com/furie1335/.Pictures/rfsigs/rush30.gif">
<a href="http://fallingtowardsapotheosis.blogspot.com/">mental vomit</a>

Lumber

07-18-2004, 09:27 AM

A.J.

12-08-2006, 09:16 AM

gvac wrote: First off, let me say that only a true barbarian would attempt to cleanse their anal area while remaining seated. How fucking lazy can you get? Second, if you had to dump on the floor and then pick it up with your bare hands, would you merely wipe your hands off with a piece of paper? Of course not, you revolting savage. You would (hopefully) use plenty of warm water and soap, until you were satisfied that you were COMPLETELY clean. Why should your ass be any different? Right. It shouldn't. Finally, let me inform you all that I am in posession of an audio tape I made several years ago that contains all the amazing and frightening sounds of diarrhea and vomiting, as well as in depth color commentary by yours truly. I'm letting you all have first dibs before I put it up on e-bay. Let the bidding commence! Steamrolling toward 1,000 posts I'm resurrecting this brilliant thread from Pootertoot because it must not be forgotten.  Thanks also to Angrymissy for finding it again.I also do so because the above post from Gvac confirms that we are long-lost brothers...well, except for the audio tape part.I'm a partial stander in that I do so only when cleansing myself.  Since I try to only take a deuce when I'm at home, I can therefore feel free to sit in comfort.  As Mr. Burns once said, "Who doesn't enjoy a good sit?"In the event I feel a breeching of the levees coming on when I'm away from my home base, I'll hover but only when absolutely necessary.  I have this fear of missing the target at point blank range, filling my pants instead of the bowl.

Alice S. Fuzzybutt

12-08-2006, 10:03 AM

What a great thread! Reminds me of the time Missy and I were going to both use <a href="http://www.colonblow.com/">Colon Blow</a> and make a thread about our results.  In the event I feel a breeching of the levees coming on when I'm away from my home base, I'll hover but only when absolutely necessary.  I have this fear of missing the target at point blank range, filling my pants instead of the bowl.I need to hover when I'm in a public bathroom. I'm more afraid of splashback than actually hitting my clothes.

angrymissy

12-08-2006, 10:16 AM

Alice S. Fuzzybutt wrote: What a great thread! Reminds me of the time Missy and I were going to both use <a href="http://www.colonblow.com/">Colon Blow</a> and make a thread about our results.  In the event I feel a breeching of the levees coming on when I'm away from my home base, I'll hover but only when absolutely necessary.  I have this fear of missing the target at point blank range, filling my pants instead of the bowl. I need to hover when I'm in a public bathroom. I'm more afraid of splashback than actually hitting my clothes.   LOL!!!!  I forgot about that.  I ordered it and never used it.  I was afraid!  I did get the nifty Colon Blow pen though.