Lessons Learned from the Movies

[KnoxHarrington]

This is a thread in which we all share a little bit of wisdom we picked up from a movie. Something you might not have realized otherwise.

Here's mine, from watching "No Country for Old Men": if you find a couple of million bucks in a briefcase, take the money, but leave the case.

[disneyspy]

i learned from BORAT that if a man tries to shove a black rubber fist up your anus he might be a homosexual

[cougarjake13]

do, or do not, there is no try

[disneyspy]

always bet on black

[underdog]

Unless you're in the top 10%, you're fucked.

[midwestjeff]

do, or do not, there is no try

Did you learn that from a movie or from Fez's therapist?


I've learned never to wait for Bodhi to pull the rip cord
and that the game is over when the fat man says it's over.

[razorboy]

Never cross the streams.


Okay, almost never cross the streams.

[A.J.]

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer.

[weekapaugjz]

if you want to avoid a bloody horse head in your bed, when a mob boss asks for something, you say "yes".

[weekapaugjz]

retarded people call sling blades kaiser blades.

[A.J.]

http://content.ytmnd.com/content/5/6/c/56c84c1adedcb93157c74b5a62827719.jpg

[HBox]

......... HE'S BATMAN.

[Sinestro]

No means Yes

Girls order pizza with no money

Doing household chores will help you learn karate

The ugly chick wearing glasses is really hot

[midwestjeff]

It's ok to fuck off in a high school history class for the
entire year because the teacher will come to your house at the end of the year
and spend a night telling you everything you need to know.

[midwestjeff]

Never put a baseball diamond in your cornfield because it will attract ghosts.

[midwestjeff]

Trying to stop inhumane treatment of animals by letting them loose
will invariably cause some kind of crazy disease outbreak.

[disneyspy]

dont go fishin for big sharks in little boats

[Jayw]

If you shoot heroin you will lose your arm.

[brettmojo]

Bread makes you fat.

[disneyspy]

if the russians attack,our high schoolers will kick their asses

[midwestjeff]

Scotland was colonized by wankers.

[Sinestro]

Never build a house on top of an Indian burial ground

If you get a job as a camp counselor, you better watch those kids in the lake instead of making out with the female camp counselor. And if that camp has a history of unfortunate events, apply somewhere else

If you and your friend are being chased by a mad killer or vicious animal and you friend is black, you're okay for awhile. But if you're both black, you're screwed.

[A.J.]

Never build a house on top of an Indian burial ground

Or a hotel or a pet cemetary for that matter.

[razorboy]

The best way to win back a girl is to become a stalker.

[disneyspy]

the best soap comes from human fat

[sailor]

if you lose your ability to form short term memories, it's ok to lie to yourself. it gives you something to do.

[razorboy]

Pain don't hurt.

[disneyspy]

if some people spend alot of money to fly you out to look at a ship wreck you can pay them back by throwing a huge diamond in the ocean

[Sinestro]

If you're being chased by the cops, you can lose them driving through the streets of the big city going mad speeding through red lights and going the wrong way without cars hitting you but the cops will run the cars that you didn't.

If you're being chased by the local sheriff, once you cross county lines they can't touch you. And you'll never get any car damage when you ramp jump the local creek/stream to get to the other side of it.

[razorboy]

If you're athletic or your family is even moderately wealthy, chances are you're a sociopath.

[brettmojo]

Only being burned by fire will wake you from the black sleep of Kali.

[Sinestro]

All asian people know some type of martial arts.

If you bring disgrace to your family's honor in a Japanese family, you're required to lose some type of body part or commit hari kari (kill your self).

Your team could be getting you're asses handed to you but somehow it all comes together in the end and your team wins.

It could be the end of the world and if there's a safe place to go that EVERYONE knows about or the town that you're in is about to be destroyed, everyone still DRIVES on the right side of the road heading out of the city even if it's backed up, yet the road into the city is empty.

[Judge Smails]

The same retard who taught elvis how to dance, wrote Imagine for John Lennon.

[StanUpshaw]

Women who work in the flesh trade make great mothers.

[razorboy]

Car theft is not only easy and socially acceptable, you also very rarely get caught.

[pennington]

Don't steal Plutonium from Libyans.

[pennington]

Spies don't die after a criminal master-mind tells them their plan.

[Sinestro]

Aliens have landed on earth and are still here, and the govt. is hiding it from us. They're holding one of them somewhere in a secret location doing experiments on the alien and it's spaceship.

[thepaulo]

Believe it or not I have learned something from each and everyone of the 147,985,683 movies I have seen.

[pennington]

There's no place like home.

[StanUpshaw]

I also learned that women often gather together in their pajamas, drink wine and sing Aretha Franklin songs.

[Sinestro]

Never ever go to a no-name motel in the middle of nowhere.

Or get off the main road to take a short-cut that's not on the map.

[Servo]

You won't sustain any serious longterm injuries from getting cracked on the skull with a gun.

[disneyspy]

Dont Go Camping At Former Nuclear Testing Grounds!!

[brettmojo]

We only have to worry about the day after tomorrow.

[A.J.]

Hyman Roth always makes money for his partners.

[disneyspy]

even tho we're technologically behind all alien races,humans can kick any other spieces ass in the universe

[ozzie]

It's all ball bearings nowadays.

[jennysmurf]

The hero will always realize in the end that the hot girl is shallow and that he could never be happy with her. He will seek out the not-as-hot, but intellectual girl.

[jennysmurf]

There is no basement in the Alamo.

[Gutter]

Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.

[Gutter]

An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.

[disneyspy]

There is no basement in the Alamo.

HAHAAHAHAHAHAHAA!!!

[Dell]

if you just swallow just the juice of the beef jerky, it will not mess with your belly shot...

you also want to keep some mustard root on those bandages and not let it get dry...

[A.J.]

It wasn't over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor.

[razorboy]

With very few exceptions, criminals have the uncanny ability to tell exactly how much money is in a briefcase or duffel bag just by looking at it.

[jonyrotn]

Nothing good can ever come from saying
bloody mary, candy man or beatleguese 3X's...

[Crash]

When the President's plane goes down on an island-sized penitentiary, you need to send in a convicted bank robber with no depth-perception to rescue him.

[disneyspy]

the movie SNATCH isnt about what you think

[Sinestro]

Nice guys always win in the end and get the girl

The U.S.A. usually leads the rest of the world when there is a crisis or invasion from aliens

The government is always hiding something from us

The life/reality we are living in now, is not real.