Will Tiger win the Masters?

[hanso]

Yes

No

I figure the odds be fifty-fifty. (Frank Zappa)

His rivals will hire all the shank mistresses. To stalk him from the gallery on every hole. This will make him loose his mind. He will need more shrinks then Fez.

[Jughead]

Spy rigged the greens............ I said Rigged!!!!:tongue:

[EliSnow]

His rivals will hire all the shank mistresses.

Are shank mistresses those that are made in prison?

[disneyspy]

Are shank mistresses those that are made in prison?

when you hit off the toe of your driver and it goes to the right (if you're right handed) its called a shank
its a nice play on words instead of calling them skanks

[Hottub]

"This could be the greatest comeback since Lazarus rose from the dead!"

[disneyspy]

<div style="float: left; margin-right: 10px;"><embed src="http://media.entertonement.com/embed/OpenEntPlayer.swf" id="1_2aab91c0_3aa8_11df_b3a1_0019b9e56dac" name="1_2aab91c0_3aa8_11df_b3a1_0019b9e56dac" flashvars="auto_play=false&clip_pid=vvbdjtklfd&e=&id=1_2aab91c0_3aa8_11df_b3a1_0019b9e56dac&skin_pid=kxlcwpsgxm" width="440" height="96" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" allowscriptaccess="always" wmode="transparent"></embed><div id="1_2aab91c0_3aa8_11df_b3a1_0019b9e56dac_anchor" style="font-size: 8px; color: black; text-decoration: none; display: block; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.entertonement.com/clips/vvbdjtklfd--Not-make-this-puttHappy-Gilmore-Fred-Perron-Heckler-" style="font-size: 8px; color: black;" target="_blank">Not make this putt sound bite</a> &nbsp;<a href="http://www.entertonement.com/collections/5848/Happy-Gilmore?ht_link=1_2aab91c0_3aa8_11df_b3a1_0019b9e5 6dac" style="font-size: 8px; color: black;" target="_blank">Happy Gilmore sound bites</a></div><img alt="Not make this putt sound bite" border="0" height="0" src="http://www.entertonement.com/widgets/img/clip/vvbdjtklfd/1/1_2aab91c0_3aa8_11df_b3a1_0019b9e56dac/blank.gif" style="visibility: hidden; width: 0px; height: 0px; margin:0; padding:0; float:right" width="0" /></div>

[hanso]

Are shank mistresses those that are made in prison?

Yea that h should be a k. I screwed up again :sad:

[Contra]

I hope he destroys everyone

[disneyspy]

i hope those shanks dont try and bait him at the masters

aghhee ghee ghee

[cougarjake13]

i say yes

[STC-Dub]

I say no.

[disneyspy]

I say no.

i dont think you realize how bad he wants to put it in the hole

[opie's twisted balls]

he's lost his mojo so he won't make the pin

[sailor]

obviously not.

[Snoogans]

i voted yes cause the last time i said definitively that tiger woods wouldnt win, it was cause no one can win a US open at torrey pines on 1 leg......oh yea


but most likely, no, he wont win

[KnoxHarrington]

My guess is that Tiger will not win, but I'd really love to see him paired with Jesper Parnevik on the last day of the Masters, and watch him give that judgmental fuck a 12 stroke beatdown.

And then on 18, he can turn to Parnevik and say "And there are a lot more porn skanks I fucked they haven't even mentioned yet, Jesper."

[Snoogans]

My guess is that Tiger will not win, but I'd really love to see him paired with Jesper Parnevik on the last day of the Masters, and watch him give that judgmental fuck a 12 stroke beatdown.

And then on 18, he can turn to Parnevik and say "And there are a lot more porn skanks I fucked they haven't even mentioned yet, Jesper."

too bad parnevik is not only not in the masters, but didnt even earn a PGA tour card this year. Fuckin BUM

[KnoxHarrington]

too bad parnevik is not only not in the masters, but didnt even earn a PGA tour card this year. Fuckin BUM

They should let him in the Masters so Tiger can beat his Eurofag ass

[Snoogans]

They should let him in the Masters so Tiger can beat his Eurofag ass

whoopin on bitch tits will be satisfying enough

[KnoxHarrington]

whoopin on bitch tits will be satisfying enough

I loved ol' Hefty injecting himself into this mess a few days ago. "Well, golly gee, I guess I'll pair with Tiger, if it's all right with everyone."

What a scumbag he is. Why couldn't he gotten the plane Payne Stewart chartered?

[hanso]

he's lost his mojo so he won't make the pin

Maybe he has just enough mojo left in his ball sack. To shoot for the pin.

[EliSnow]

when you hit off the toe of your driver and it goes to the right (if you're right handed) its called a shank

Yes, I know that meaning (especially since I've been shanking on every drive for over ten years) but given the mistake, I went for the other meaning of shank.

its a nice play on words instead of calling them skanks

Really? Hmm .....

Yea that h should be a k. I screwed up again :sad:

Ha, spy!

[Snoogans]

actually, if you are righty, shankin a ball generally, at least when ive heard it, refered to overpulling the ball left. Shanked it to the left. Anytime you push it right they just call it sliced

[disneyspy]

actually, if you are righty, shankin a ball generally, at least when ive heard it, refered to overpulling the ball left. Shanked it to the left. Anytime you push it right they just call it sliced

a hook and a slice are generally getting ahold of the ball somewhat,ive always heard as a shank being hitting the toe (the part by the shaft)of the club and it going almost anywhere but mostly perpendicular (close at you or directly away from you)

[Snoogans]

a hook and a slice are generally getting ahold of the ball somewhat,ive always heard as a shank being hitting the toe (the part by the shaft)of the club and it going almost anywhere but mostly perpendicular (close at you or directly away from you)

oh i see what you are sayin.

What would you call it, and ive seen this happen. In fact, Billy Staples did it. What do you call it when a guy tees it up, takes his driver, and swings so underneath the ball that it pops straight up and lands 5 feet BEHIND him

[weekapaugjz]

oh i see what you are sayin.

What would you call it, and ive seen this happen. In fact, Billy Staples did it. What do you call it when a guy tees it up, takes his driver, and swings so underneath the ball that it pops straight up and lands 5 feet BEHIND him

embarrassing.

[Snoogans]

embarrassing.

the best part was, the ball wasnt even teed up that high. He had to take a good chunk of ground just to get his driver that low

[disneyspy]

oh i see what you are sayin.

What would you call it, and ive seen this happen. In fact, Billy Staples did it. What do you call it when a guy tees it up, takes his driver, and swings so underneath the ball that it pops straight up and lands 5 feet BEHIND him

hahhaa,i call that comedy

a couple of years ago my buddy hit himself in the balls with his own ball when he muscled up to much tryin to get a power drive (fucker hits 300 all the time) we fucking laid down laughing it was so damn funny. the i shouldve yelled two jokes went on the rest of the round

[pennington]

I voted no.

It's a shame for the player who does win. All the analysts will say Tiger would have won if he didn't have douchiness come back to haunt him.

[TroutSkin]

I wouldn't be surprised if Tiger fails to make the cut.

[Snoogans]

i guess ill put this here instead of making a new thread.


par 3 contest on espn. always my favorite part of the masters

[spoon]

nope

and that staples drive on that par four effectively made it a par five (it actually went behind him by about 20 feet and killed his angle over the water and tree line)

he's such a mess

[ozzie]

nope

and that staples drive on that par four effectively made it a par five (it actually went behind him by about 20 feet and killed his angle over the water and tree line)

he's such a mess


I guess that none of his "5 Letters" were in Golf.

Staples. Now.

[ozzie]

i guess ill put this here instead of making a new thread.


par 3 contest on espn. always my favorite part of the masters


I give up trying to watch anything at work. Maybe I can program my DVR from here.

How much have I missed?

[King Hippos Bandaid]

nope


too much shit in his head right now


He will win again., just not this weekend


:king:

[Fillmore Slim]

actually, if you are righty, shankin a ball generally, at least when ive heard it, refered to overpulling the ball left. Shanked it to the left. Anytime you push it right they just call it sliced

Hitting the ball on a straight line left of the target is called a pull. A push and a slice are two different things. A push starts right of the target and holds it's line. A slice will continue to move right as the ball travels in the air.

a hook and a slice are generally getting ahold of the ball somewhat,ive always heard as a shank being hitting the toe (the part by the shaft)of the club and it going almost anywhere but mostly perpendicular (close at you or directly away from you)

The part by the shaft is the hosel, the part under neither is the butt. The toe is at the other end of the face.

A shank typically come of the face at a 45*(or so) angle.


As for tiger winning, I highly doubt it. The guy hasn't competed in 6 months and he's only won the masters once in the last seven years.

[TeeBone]

I have doubts in him making the cut...

He will win the Masters again, but not this year.

[disneyspy]

Hitting the ball on a straight line left of the target is called a pull. A push and a slice are two different things. A push starts right of the target and holds it's line. A slice will continue to move right as the ball travels in the air.



The part by the shaft is the hosel, the part under neither is the butt. The toe is at the other end of the face.

A shank typically come of the face at a 45*(or so) angle.


As for tiger winning, I highly doubt it. The guy hasn't competed in 6 months and he's only won the masters once in the last seven years.

why are you giving snoogans information that wasnt asked mr google answers? and i'll bet tiger surprises you nay sayers and does really good,i mean the man lives on a really challenging super private golf course that makes augusta look like a public course,he'll be ready

[Snoogans]

why are you giving snoogans information that wasnt asked mr google answers? and i'll bet tiger surprises you nay sayers and does really good,i mean the man lives on a really challenging super private golf course that makes augusta look like a public course,he'll be ready

funny he wasnt ready any of the past years.

the course doesnt make a fuckin bit of difference. Look at past years. If Tiger hits putts, he will probably win. if he putts like "normal" probably not, if he putts like a guy who hasnt putt in a tourney in almost a year, he will get smoked

[Fillmore Slim]

why are you giving snoogans information that wasnt asked mr google answers? and i'll bet tiger surprises you nay sayers and does really good,i mean the man lives on a really challenging super private golf course that makes augusta look like a public course,he'll be ready

You guys didn't really know what you were talking about as far as the terminology goes so I thought I'd help out. I really don't know why you would see that as a negative.

As for me using Google for my reply, no. Working in the business for 12 years, yes.



And Isleworth does not make Augusta National look like a public course, sorry.

[disneyspy]

funny he wasnt ready any of the past years.

the course doesnt make a fuckin bit of difference. Look at past years. If Tiger hits putts, he will probably win. if he putts like "normal" probably not, if he putts like a guy who hasnt putt in a tourney in almost a year, he will get smoked

i agree but to say he wont make the cut is pretty rediculous,it's not like he's playing in his first tourney or first major

[Snoogans]

You guys didn't really know what you were talking about as far as the terminology goes so I thought I'd help out. I really don't know why you would see that as a negative.

.

in fairness, i dont know cause im a scratch golfer. I hit every shot perfect every time and so I never needed to know

[Snoogans]

i agree but to say he wont make the cut is pretty rediculous,it's not like he's playing in his first tourney or first major

didnt he just miss the cut at the British Open or something?

[disneyspy]

And Isleworth does not make Augusta National look like a public course, sorry.

you ever play either course mr pro shop?

[spoon]

in fairness, i dont know cause im a scratch golfer. I hit every shot perfect every time and so I never needed to know

Wow, that must make me the second coming of Nicklaus!

[spoon]

you ever play either course mr pro shop?

Someone is clearly upset about nothing!

Don't bother dspy, he's REAL old.

[Snoogans]

Wow, that must make me the second coming of Nicklaus!

total par on the course we play isnt 94? someone lied to me

[spoon]

total par on the course we play isnt 94? someone lied to me

SWEET!

[Jack Nicklaus]

Wow, that must make me the second coming of Nicklaus!

Hardly, young man. I am the proud winner of 18 major championships, making me the greatest golfer of all-time and you are a nobody.

[furie]

i'm pulling for Tiger to win

[spoon]

Hardly, young man. I am the proud winner of 18 major championships, making me the greatest golfer of all-time and you are a nobody.

I certainly am NOT a lunch meat champion or Friday diddler. That much I do know...powder strikes!

[KnoxHarrington]

OK, I hope you can figure out what Nike is trying to do with this ad, because I sure as fuck can't:

<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/5NTRvlrP2NU&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/5NTRvlrP2NU&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

Seriously, WTF? Tiger standing there stone-faced while his dead-ass dad lectures him? What?

[furie]

OK, I hope you can figure out what Nike is trying to do with this ad, because I sure as fuck can't:

<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/5NTRvlrP2NU&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/5NTRvlrP2NU&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

Seriously, WTF? Tiger standing there stone-faced while his dead-ass dad lectures him? What?


it's like a film school project

[spoon]

Just awful.

[disneyspy]

i was at work the other day and my ex gf (thr crazy stalker chick) came out of the clubhouse and yelled at me as i drove by,something about being a cheater, i yelled back " I'M TIGER WOODS!!" and kept going


this story is made up but if (when) the bitch ever does yell at me,i'm ready


and f u spoon

[Snoogans]

i was at work the other day and my ex gf (thr crazy stalker chick) came out of the clubhouse and yelled at me as i drove by,something about being a cheater, i yelled back " I'M TIGER WOODS!!" and kept going


this story is made up but if (when) the bitch ever does yell at me,i'm ready


and f u spoon

what the fuck kinda pills do they give you?

[disneyspy]

what the fuck kinda pills do they give you?

penis reducers,lately whenever i get a hard on all the blood leaves my brain and i pass out,its embarassing laying on the floor with a stiffy at a shady strip club

[opie's twisted balls]

OK, I hope you can figure out what Nike is trying to do with this ad, because I sure as fuck can't:

<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/5NTRvlrP2NU&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/5NTRvlrP2NU&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

Seriously, WTF? Tiger standing there stone-faced while his dead-ass dad lectures him? What?

fuckin creepy

[disneyspy]

unbelievable coverage of this years Masters @ http://www.cbssports.com/video/player/masters-live?ttag_ML10_SEM_all_goog_na_adg_0001

[Snoogans]

unbelievable coverage of this years Masters @ http://www.cbssports.com/video/player/masters-live?ttag_ML10_SEM_all_goog_na_adg_0001

its the same shit thats on the masters website

[disneyspy]

its the same shit thats on the masters website

just checked it out,i like the masters.com better,thanks

[disneyspy]

actually,i take that back,you cant contol the masters pop up size,fuck that shit,i'm a multiple window guy,back to cbs

[Dell]

what the heck happened to Woosnam today?..+9...

I can view, but not listen to the coverage...did he blow up on one hole or multiple holes?..

[opie's twisted balls]

what the heck happened to Woosnam today?..+9
I believe the official diagnosis from his sports psychologist is that he shit the bed

[KingModem]

There is a plane flying over Augusta tailing a sign that says "Tiger: Did you mean bootyism?" Maybe Tom Watson hired the guy?

[spoon]

There is a plane flying over Augusta tailing a sign that says "Tiger: Did you mean bootyism?" Maybe Tom Watson hired the guy?

Really? That's just lame.

[EliSnow]

Really? That's just lame.


That's like the second or third time I saw that joke. I think it's going around the internet.

[Snoogans]

tom watson in the lead

[spoon]

Mickelson looking solid.

Wouldn't that just be the perfect tournament? I'd personally love seeing him just take over the spotlight and routinely beating Woods from here on out. Nicklaus, you are still the best ever my man!

[spoon]

By the way, that's the first time bitch tits was ever labeled as, "solid".

[Snoogans]

Mickelson looking solid.

Wouldn't that just be the perfect tournament? I'd personally love seeing him just take over the spotlight and routinely beating Woods from here on out. Nicklaus, you are still the best ever my man!

i dont think he is good enough at the moment, or should I say, I dont think he can focus well enough with his wife still struggling some.

its gonna turn into every other sport that sucks. parody. some different bum will win every week and its gonna suck

[Snoogans]

and tiger is -1 right now. so he seems to at least be hittin pretty well. I cant watch it cause the people who run the online coverage are retarded

[Snoogans]

i hate the fact that bitch tits looks thinner

[spoon]

i hate the fact that bitch tits looks thinner

Rumor has it, he's taking some of his wife's meds for this.

[Snoogans]

some 16 year old italian amatuer shot 71 today

[spoon]

some 16 year old italian amatuer shot 71 today

He's going to HELL!

[Jughead]

http://outofbounds.nbcsports.com/2010/04/wacky-aairplane-banner-at-the-masters-tiger-did-you-mean-bootyis.htm

[spoon]

http://outofbounds.nbcsports.com/2010/04/wacky-aairplane-banner-at-the-masters-tiger-did-you-mean-bootyis.htm

Ahhhh, the bad link joke.

[Jughead]

Ahhhh, the bad link joke.

No Im sorry spoon i must have messed up..was just showing there was a plane

[Jughead]

http://outofbounds.nbcsports.com/tigerbanner07.jpg

[KnoxHarrington]

Nike statement on the weird-ass Tiger Woods ad:

"We support Tiger and his family. As he returns to competitive golf, the ad addresses his time away from the game using the powerful words of his father."

Yes, dumbasses, we knew that. We just don't know what the hell you're going for here.

[spoon]

http://outofbounds.nbcsports.com/tigerbanner07.jpg

If you're going to pay someone to do that, it might as well be witty or at least mean. That just fails on every fucking level.

[spoon]

Nike statement on the weird-ass Tiger Woods ad:



Yes, dumbasses, we knew that. We just don't know what the hell you're going for here.

Yes, Tiger screams family to me. And damn right you support him, to the tune of millions annually.

[KnoxHarrington]

Yes, Tiger screams family to me. And damn right you support him, to the tune of millions annually.

And the thing is that from what I've read, Earl Woods was quite the cocksman himself.

[spoon]

And the thing is that from what I've read, Earl Woods was quite the cocksman himself.

By did you learn anything he was simply referring to new places to land 3 input girls...white ones of course.

Just do it.

[Snoogans]

early prediction for US Open champ this year:

Me

[Snoogans]

Tiger is even thru 7 but has like a 10 footer comin up for eagle on 8

place went fuckin NUTS when he stuck it there


its live on ESPN now btw

[Snoogans]

-2 thru 8

[Snoogans]

how the fuck do you take that much time off and still do shit like that. He really is unbelievable

[KnoxHarrington]

That shot on 9 was fucking magic. No way he should have pulled that off.

[Snoogans]

That shot on 9 was fucking magic. No way he should have pulled that off.

the camera from behind was fuckin perfect too. As soon as that ball came off the club it just bit left and as soon as he started hoppin out to see it I knew it was good. But jesus was it good

[Snoogans]

this really cant happen can it? I know its only 9 holes in but. There is no way he can win this fuckin thing......right?

[disneyspy]

<div style="float: left; margin-right: 10px;"><embed src="http://media.entertonement.com/embed/OpenEntPlayer.swf" id="1_78185fac_434e_11df_b6f7_0015c58957e5" name="1_78185fac_434e_11df_b6f7_0015c58957e5" flashvars="auto_play=false&clip_pid=bcfgsnsqcg&e=&id=1_78185fac_434e_11df_b6f7_0015c58957e5&skin_pid=wfxswdnlkf" width="300" height="30" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" pluginspage="http://www.macromedia.com/go/getflashplayer" allowscriptaccess="always" wmode="transparent"></embed><div id="1_78185fac_434e_11df_b6f7_0015c58957e5_anchor" style="font-size: 8px; color: black; text-decoration: none; display: block; text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.entertonement.com/clips/bcfgsnsqcg--22" style="font-size: 8px; color: black;" target="_blank">It's in the hole! sound bite</a> &nbsp;<a href="http://www.entertonement.com/collections/5952/Carl-Spackler?ht_link=1_78185fac_434e_11df_b6f7_0015c58 957e5" style="font-size: 8px; color: black;" target="_blank">Carl Spackler sound bites</a></div><img alt="It's in the hole! sound bite" border="0" height="0" src="http://www.entertonement.com/widgets/img/clip/bcfgsnsqcg/1/1_78185fac_434e_11df_b6f7_0015c58957e5/blank.gif" style="visibility: hidden; width: 0px; height: 0px; margin:0; padding:0; float:right" width="0" /></div>

[KnoxHarrington]

the camera from behind was fuckin perfect too. As soon as that ball came off the club it just bit left and as soon as he started hoppin out to see it I knew it was good. But jesus was it good

CBS (and, yes, I know this is on ESPN, but they're just carrying it for CBS today) is so much better at golf coverage than the other networks that it's kinda ridiculous.

I wish that they'd get the US and British Opens too. Especially the US Open -- we need to get that asshole Johnny Miller off that. Yeah, we know you shot a 61 in the final round Johnny, shut the fuck up.

[underdog]

this really cant happen can it? I know its only 9 holes in but. There is no way he can win this fuckin thing......right?

didn't you say he was going to win them all this year?

[Snoogans]

CBS (and, yes, I know this is on ESPN, but they're just carrying it for CBS today) is so much better at golf coverage than the other networks that it's kinda ridiculous.

I wish that they'd get the US and British Opens too. Especially the US Open -- we need to get that asshole Johnny Miller off that. Yeah, we know you shot a 61 in the final round Johnny, shut the fuck up.

it was a 63 in the final round. but dont worry, you will remember when he tells you 65 more times from pebble beach

[Snoogans]

didn't you say he was going to win them all this year?

that was before he took time off. I was assuming he was still gonna play his normal schedule at that time

[KnoxHarrington]

that was before he took time off. I was assuming he was still gonna play his normal schedule at that time

Well, three of the majors are in his favorite courses: Augusta, of course, but the US Open is at Pebble Beach, where he once laid a 15 shot asswhooping on the rest of the field, and the British is at St. Andrew's, where he's won two Open Championships, and set a scoring record.

The PGA is at some shithole in Wisconsin. What a joke.

[KnoxHarrington]

One thing I noticed about Tiger, looking something up: his major championships have been pretty balanced. 4 Masters, 4 PGA's, 3 US Opens, and 3 British Opens. He's not feasting on one of them and just sort of showing up for the others.

And all of these majors each call for a certain unique style of play. They aren't the same sort of tournament at all.

[Snoogans]

One thing I noticed about Tiger, looking something up: his major championships have been pretty balanced. 4 Masters, 4 PGA's, 3 US Opens, and 3 British Opens. He's not feasting on one of them and just sort of showing up for the others.

And all of these majors each call for a certain unique style of play. They aren't the same sort of tournament at all.

he is like that with like every tourney. he just feasts on them all basically

[KnoxHarrington]

he is like that with like every tourney. he just feasts on them all basically

I think that if he doesn't win this week, he's going to win either the US or the British. My guess, actually, would be the British.

[Snoogans]

I think that if he doesn't win this week, he's going to win either the US or the British. My guess, actually, would be the British.

i love the british cause i get to see Van De Velde highlights for a week straight


and now that he is playin and gets back to form, i wouldnt put it past him winning the last 3. I just dont see how he can win this as his first tourney since Novemeber

[underdog]

The PGA is at some shithole in Wisconsin. What a joke.

you could have just said Wisconsin.

[KnoxHarrington]

Not a particuarly difficult eagle putt coming up for Tiger on 13

[Snoogans]

what a bum this Woods guy is.

[KingModem]

Tiger is playing pretty amazing today. I just can't fucking believe this guy. When it couldn't be more impossible for him to win, he is still dominating.

[hanso]

The new kinder and gentler tiger is not swearing when he goofs.
Well not for the time being anyhoo.

[Snoogans]

The new kinder and gentler tiger is not swearing when he goofs.
Well not for the time being anyhoo.

he came pretty close after his last approach, dropped the club, and even started to yell dammit

[hanso]

You heard dammit? Lol I heard god.


I miss curtis strange. This guy would blow up big time on the course.

freddy boom boom getting after it.

[hanso]

the man lives on a really challenging super private golf course that makes augusta look like a public course,he'll be ready




Isleworth does not make Augusta National look like a public course, sorry.

boca raton municipal has them both beat.

[EliSnow]

Nice tee shot on the par three by Tiger.

EDIT: Scratch that. I didn't realize it was an approach shot.

[KnoxHarrington]

Tiger shot his lowest scoring opening round ever today.

Can I change my vote to "Yes"?

[Snoogans]

seriously. now you fools no why i wouldnt say no. I dont care what happens, i will never say no he cannot win

[spoon]

what a bum this Woods guy is.

Tiger is playing pretty amazing today. I just can't fucking believe this guy. When it couldn't be more impossible for him to win, he is still dominating.

seriously. now you fools no why i wouldnt say no. I dont care what happens, i will never say no he cannot win

Settle down, it's Thursday (or was) and I get the feeling he basically put SOOO much into today and he'll now fall apart and lose this thing easily from here. Oh and he's NOT in the lead. Go Couples!

[Snoogans]

Settle down, it's Thursday (or was) and I get the feeling he basically put SOOO much into today and he'll now fall apart and lose this thing easily from here. Oh and he's NOT in the lead. Go Couples!

couples birdied 2. -7

[spoon]

couples birdied 2. -7

pa pa pa pa pa pa power!

[brettmojo]

http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/sex-addict-banner.jpg

The Cessna airplane that was flying the friendly skies over Augusta National yesterday with clever messages (http://widget.uproxx.com/b/2/http://www.trailingtiger.com/2010/4/8/1411539/no-tiger-bootyism-is-not-a-made-up) directed at Tiger Woods trailing behind it will not be hovering over the course today as it has been grounded by the FAA for some “needed repairs.” (http://withleather.uproxx.com/2010/04/your-daily-mastersgate-plane-update)

[Snoogans]

http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/sex-addict-banner.jpg

they asked him what he thought of the plane the first day after his round. he said he didnt see it but it happens alot. Even before this people used to do that. He said he finds it funny

[brettmojo]

they asked him what he thought of the plane the first day after his round. he said he didnt see it but it happens alot. Even before this people used to do that. He said he finds it funny
Some of the Nike commercial spoofs are a real treat too.

<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/sCG94s0mWRw&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/sCG94s0mWRw&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

[EliSnow]

http://cdn.wl.uproxx.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/04/sex-addict-banner.jpg


That's lousy reporting. clever messages my ass.

[spoon]

That's lousy reporting. clever messages my ass.

awful

[Mitch&Murray]

I personally dont care who wins but I must comment on the Masters.com.
This is by far the greatest coverage website of anything Ive seen on the net. The various streaming feeds are gorgeous and as clear as anything on my TV, the interactive leaderboard is up to date instantly and all the bells and whistles are very nice.

Example. I have been streaming the featured pairing and the history stream has bookmarked highlights like Tigers or Chois birdies so ai can jump back to them or continue streaming live.

Very impressive overall.

[EliSnow]

I personally dont care who wins but I must comment on the Masters.com.
This is by far the greatest coverage website of anything Ive seen on the net. The various streaming feeds are gorgeous and as clear as anything on my TV, the interactive leaderboard is up to date instantly and all the bells and whistles are very nice.

Example. I have been streaming the featured pairing and the history stream has bookmarked highlights like Tigers or Chois birdies so ai can jump back to them or continue streaming live.

Very impressive overall.

I concur.

[KnoxHarrington]

Westwood just totally shit the bed on 14, so we've got a tie on the top of the leaderboard, and Tiger's 2 back.

[Snoogans]

I personally dont care who wins but I must comment on the Masters.com.
This is by far the greatest coverage website of anything Ive seen on the net. The various streaming feeds are gorgeous and as clear as anything on my TV, the interactive leaderboard is up to date instantly and all the bells and whistles are very nice.

Example. I have been streaming the featured pairing and the history stream has bookmarked highlights like Tigers or Chois birdies so ai can jump back to them or continue streaming live.

Very impressive overall.

yea they do really good with it. they have it for all the majors and the WGC and playoff events too. Usually with the same coverage format.

The best part about it is, even though its just online, they go all out and they get the real broadcasters to do it. So it looks great and hearing nance and Ian Eagle and Faherty just makes it perfect

[hanso]

Tiger should lose for giving his go ahead on that last horrid nike tv comercial.

[EliSnow]

Wow. Two eagles in a row for Phil and Tiger's has 4 bogeys this round.

[hanso]

Wow. Two eagles in a row for Phil and Tiger's has 4 bogeys this round.

He was very close to following that up with a thrid one.

[Snoogans]

He was very close to following that up with a thrid one.

and yet somehow is at -8

tomorrow should be fun

[hanso]

I was speaking of Phil sir.

[Snoogans]

I was speaking of Phil sir.

oh. tiger almost followed with a 3rd bogey too.

eitherway, tomorrow will kick ass

personally, im rootin for boom boom and his skate shoes

[EliSnow]

I was speaking of Phil sir.

Why is everyone calling Snoogans "sir" now?

[Snoogans]

Why is everyone calling Snoogans "sir" now?

cause i command respect

[Jughead]

Why is everyone calling Snoogans "sir" now?

It is kinda cool

[spoon]

Why is everyone calling Snoogans "sir" now?

I call him cunt face. I believe that's latin for sir?

[hanso]

oh. tiger almost followed with a 3rd bogey too.

eitherway, tomorrow will kick ass

personally, im rootin for boom boom and his skate shoes

He thought he had 4. tom watson shoots record low, rest of field comes back would be nice. Or lefty, I missed his run. uggh.

[EliSnow]

I call him cunt face. I believe that's latin for sir?


Huh. I thought phenom was Latin for cunt face. Maybe it's Aramaic.

[hanso]

Tiger dropped his driver hitting into the trees off the first tee. F bomb coming in........................... ____ minutes.

[spoon]

Tiger dropped his driver hitting into the trees off the first tee. F bomb coming in........................... ____ minutes.

he's a changed man silly

[EliSnow]

Wow. That was a real piece of bad luck for Phil. Putting for birdie and a piece of dirt/grass flies into his line just as he hits the ball; the ball hits the dirt and changes course.

Didn't hurt him badly, but that had to suck.

[spoon]

Wow. That was a real piece of bad luck for Phil. Putting for birdie and a piece of dirt/grass flies into his line just as he hits the ball; the ball hits the dirt and changes course.

Didn't hurt him badly, but that had to suck.

def cost him a stroke

[hanso]

Wow. That was a real piece of bad luck for Phil. Putting for birdie and a piece of dirt/grass flies into his line just as he hits the ball; the ball hits the dirt and changes course.

Didn't hurt him badly, but that had to suck.

Better to happen when it did then toward the end.

[Snoogans]

Tiger sucks balls

[EliSnow]

Big eagle for Tiger. Maybe he can turn it around to get close.

[spoon]

Big eagle for Tiger. Maybe he can turn it around to get close.

Hope not

[epo]

Tiger sucks balls

No silly, that's the whore's job!

[Snoogans]

lets go freddy

[EliSnow]

I think the next couple of hours are going to be pretty great. Phil's playing smart and solid. Westwood's a little inconsistent, but doing well. Couples is doing well too. KJ Choi is playing the best of all of them, and Tiger's close enough, especially with that last shot, to possibly challenge.

This could be really, really great.

[hanso]

I think the next couple of hours are going to be pretty great. Phil's playing smart and solid. Westwood's a little inconsistent, but doing well. Couples is doing well too. KJ Choi is playing the best of all of them, and Tiger's close enough, especially with that last shot, to possibly challenge.

This could be really, really great.

Playoff? I've had baseball on. Will switch back when it's done.

[EliSnow]

Playoff? I've had baseball on. Will switch back when it's done.

The final group is just finishing 9, so we have 2 1/2 hours or so to go.

[Tenbatsuzen]

I wonder if FIGJAM is gonna pull out a Norman-style choke here.

[Snoogans]

I wonder if FIGJAM is gonna pull out a Norman-style choke here.

im assuming you mean phil, who has led by 1 at most

norman blew a 6 shot lead. this makes no sense. plus phil chokes, why not just say another phil choke

and what the fuck is FIGJAM?

[brettmojo]

and what the fuck is FIGJAM?

http://www.mrbojumbles.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/dalhousie-fig-jam.jpg

[EliSnow]

Goddamn, KJ is playing well.

[Tenbatsuzen]

and what the fuck is FIGJAM?

Phil's nickname. "Fuck I'm Good, Just Ask Me."

[Snoogans]

Phil's nickname. "Fuck I'm Good, Just Ask Me."

that might be the dumbest thing ive ever heard

[spoon]

that might be the dumbest thing ive ever heard



<object width="640" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/NOob3ga5EIk&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/NOob3ga5EIk&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="640" height="385"></embed></object>

[Snoogans]

damn that was nice from tiger

[EliSnow]

Jesus, Tiger is such an incredible scrambler.

[EliSnow]

What a great run of holes for Anthony Kim.

[Snoogans]

What a great run of holes for Anthony Kim.

in the woods on 17 though

[hanso]

Wow what a shot by lefty. They say he needed it.

He was blessed by amen corner.

[Snoogans]

they are all awesome and then they all suck. this is nuts. no one seems to really wanna take it

[Tenbatsuzen]

Tiger at -10 with an Eagle.

[spoon]

What a great run of holes for Anthony Kim.

Not as nice as Tiger's run on "holes". Ha!

<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Gf71JKROVYY&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Gf71JKROVYY&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

[EliSnow]

they are all awesome and then they all suck. this is nuts. no one seems to really wanna take it

I wouldn't say Phil's sucked. He's yet to have a bogey today. He should win this.

[spoon]

What a great run of holes for Anthony Kim.

Here's where Kim went to school!

<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/rbsd6w9HIIE&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/rbsd6w9HIIE&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

[spoon]

Yah, Phil has played real cool and is posting a solid card right now. Not to mention some monster shots of late, and that stroke he was robbed on with the debri from hell.

[hanso]

he's a changed man silly

His next nike ad should have him swearing, highing, and nailing whores.

[Snoogans]

phil mighta locked it up


i really hope he remembers winged foot

[spoon]

FIGJAM for the win!

:lol:

[Snoogans]

man I hate Phil. But man am I glad he won. Just to see him when he hugged his wife after. That and the fact that he went out and took it, you can only respect that.

Good for you FIGJAM.

You fat douche

[EliSnow]

man I hate Phil. But man am I glad he won. Just to see him when he hugged his wife after. That and the fact that he went out and took it, you can only respect that.

Good for you FIGJAM.

You fat douche

I feel the same way. He did what he did to win and played really good golf today.

I think it's also amazing the fact that Tiger did so well today. His lack of play prior to this weekend was the deciding factor I think. I can't say he would have beat Phil, but it would have made a great event if he had played some tourneys prior to the Masters.

[Mitch&Murray]

I've stated this before, I always preferred Phil the fat Guy who makes idiotic shots AND amazing shots to the robotic Tiger. He has always been likeable and he's very sympathetic.particularly now with his wife. I'm glad for him. How can you not like somebody with that goofy smile?

[EliSnow]

I've stated this before, I always preferred Phil the fat Guy who makes idiotic shots AND amazing shots to the robotic Tiger. He has always been likeable and he's very sympathetic.particularly now with his wife. I'm glad for him. How can you not like somebody with that goofy smile?

I never got this characterization of Tiger. How is he "robotic?" He's more energetic and emotional than Phil, both when he screws up and when he succeeds. Robotic in sports has been used to describe an athlete who plays technically incredible but shows very little emotion. That's not Tiger.

And over the years, especially when working on his swing, he would have bad drives, and then come up with unbelievable shots.

[Tenbatsuzen]

What I'm really surprised about is that people are thinking that it's the affairs that fucked up tiger today... dude said on Monday he ripped up his achilles tendon. That was probably also a factor as well.

[Mitch&Murray]

I never got this characterization of Tiger. How is he "robotic?" He's more energetic and emotional than Phil, both when he screws up and when he succeeds. Robotic in sports has been used to describe an athlete who plays technically incredible but shows very little emotion. That's not Tiger.

And over the years, especially when working on his swing, he would have bad drives, and then come up with unbelievable shots.

Alright maybe not robotic but more cold blooded. He seems to share nothing with the gallery or the other golfers. He is the most celebrated performer out there and barely acknowledges anyone. I'm sure that's what it takes for him to do what he does but it is hard to root for. Admire yes. Root for nah

Hard

[Tenbatsuzen]

I never got this characterization of Tiger. How is he "robotic?" He's more energetic and emotional than Phil, both when he screws up and when he succeeds. Robotic in sports has been used to describe an athlete who plays technically incredible but shows very little emotion. That's not Tiger.

And over the years, especially when working on his swing, he would have bad drives, and then come up with unbelievable shots.

I think the problem is that the pre-scandal image of Tiger *off* the course is robotic. Always saying the right cliches, no personality.

[EliSnow]

Alright maybe not robotic but more cold blooded. He seems to share nothing with the gallery or the other golfers. He is the most celebrated performer out there and barely acknowledges anyone. I'm sure that's what it takes for him to do what he does but it is hard to root for. Admire yes. Root for nah

Hard

Prior to the scandal, Tiger got along with the other golfers on Tour much better than Phil did. Journalists have been reporting for years that Phil was the least liked guy on Tour.

As for not sharing with the gallery, the amount of people cheering for him and getting caught up in his emotion demonstrates this.

Does he give the high fives that Phil does? No, but by displaying his emotion the way he has, he's shared a lot with the audience.

[EliSnow]

I think the problem is that the pre-scandal image of Tiger *off* the course is robotic. Always saying the right cliches, no personality.

Fine, but he is certainly not that way in the least when he's playing the game.

And really that's when the public is watching him 90% of the time. On the course, not in press conferences.

[Mitch&Murray]

Prior to the scandal, Tiger got along with the other golfers on Tour much better than Phil did. Journalists have been reporting for years that Phil was the least liked guy on Tour.

As for not sharing with the gallery, the amount of people cheering for him and getting caught up in his emotion demonstrates this.

Does he give the high fives that Phil does? No, but by displaying his emotion the way he has, he's shared a lot with the audience.

Really?
I have heard quite the opposite too so who knows. I'm also going by my cousin who caddied on the tour for 15 years.

[spoon]

Really?
I have heard quite the opposite too so who knows. I'm also going by my cousin who caddied on the tour for 15 years.

I agree, I've heard the same as drjoe. It really doesn't matter as we all have our favs one way or the other. I for one am happy as hell with the result, as I never liked Tiger and it has nothing to do with his latest issue.

[EliSnow]

Really?
I have heard quite the opposite too so who knows. I'm also going by my cousin who caddied on the tour for 15 years.

Matty didn't come up with the nickname FIGJAM. According to a GQ article, that's the nickname the other tour players gave him. (http://www.worldgolf.com/blogs/alan.katz/2006/02/06/why_players_on_the_pga_tour_call_phil_mi).

There's been other articles and reports on this.

[Mitch&Murray]

Matty didn't come up with the nickname FIGJAM. According to a GQ article, that's the nickname the other tour players gave him. (http://www.worldgolf.com/blogs/alan.katz/2006/02/06/why_players_on_the_pga_tour_call_phil_mi).

There's been other articles and reports on this.


Plus every golfer on tour knows Tiger is the goose that laid the golden egg for them

[EliSnow]

Plus every golfer on tour knows Tiger is the goose that laid the golden egg for them

I agree with you that the way he has changed golf purses certainly will help him with other golfers. But from what I've read in a number of books about the game, Tiger does interact with other golfers pretty well. He'll hang with them in the locker room, joke etc. Last year, I read a book by Rocco Mediate and John Feinstein that talked about both factors. John Feinstein has written about both Phil and Tiger and their interactions with other players in his other golf books, as well.

I'm not saying that no one should like Phil better than Tiger. And I can't say that the articles I cited are accurate. I understand why people like Phil better and root for him rather than Tiger. I'm not one of those people, but I have my own reasons. My only point is that appearances of the two during a tournament, and how they interact with fans may be deceiving as to their true personalities and their ability to communicate/get along with others.

[brettmojo]

Now back to not giving a shit about golf.

[Mitch&Murray]

I agree with you that the way he has changed golf purses certainly will help him with other golfers. But from what I've read in a number of books about the game, Tiger does interact with other golfers pretty well. He'll hang with them in the locker room, joke etc. Last year, I read a book by Rocco Mediate and John Feinstein that talked about both factors. John Feinstein has written about both Phil and Tiger and their interactions with other players in his other golf books, as well.

I'm not saying that no one should like Phil better than Tiger. And I can't say that the articles I cited are accurate. I understand why people like Phil better and root for him rather than Tiger. I'm not one of those people, but I have my own reasons. My only point is that appearances of the two during a tournament, and how they interact with fans may be deceiving as to their true personalities and their ability to communicate/get along with others.

I don't mean to argue with you about this BUT. I've heard Feinstein every week for 3 years on Kornheisers radio show and he thinks Tiger is an asshole

[Tenbatsuzen]

Matty didn't come up with the nickname FIGJAM. According to a GQ article, that's the nickname the other tour players gave him. (http://www.worldgolf.com/blogs/alan.katz/2006/02/06/why_players_on_the_pga_tour_call_phil_mi).

There's been other articles and reports on this.


Wait, did Snoogs and Spoon actually think that was a nickname I was personally trying to give Phil to catch on?


BAHAHAHAHAHAHA

[Tenbatsuzen]

I don't mean to argue with you about this BUT. I've heard Feinstein every week for 3 years on Kornheisers radio show and he thinks Tiger is an asshole

If half the shit the other women say is true, yes, Tiger is an asshole w/o a lick of people smarts. But Golf isn't a team game, so if you're an asshole, it doesn't matter. Do you respect the way the guy plays the game?

[EliSnow]

I don't mean to argue with you about this BUT. I've heard Feinstein every week for 3 years on Kornheisers radio show and he thinks Tiger is an asshole

Maybe he does personally, but I was talking about Feinstein reporting about how other players feel about Tiger. And in the books I've read, he has talked about how Tiger does get along with the other players on Tour. In the first year or so that he was on Tour, he was very standoffish, but over the years, that's changed. He doesn't say that he gets along with everyone, but he has written that he gets along better than Phil does.

As far as I remember, Feinstein didn't include his own personal feelings about players in these books, and that is different than how other players feel.

[Mitch&Murray]

If half the shit the other women say is true, yes, Tiger is an asshole w/o a lick of people smarts. But Golf isn't a team game, so if you're an asshole, it doesn't matter. Do you respect the way the guy plays the game?
Already posted, admire his skill root for anyone else

[EliSnow]

Wait, did Snoogs and Spoon actually think that was a nickname I was personally trying to give Phil to catch on?


BAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I have no idea if they believe that or not. I was just referring to the fact that the term you used earlier was a term other players had given Phil.

[epo]

Wait, did Snoogs and Spoon actually think that was a nickname I was personally trying to give Phil to catch on?


BAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Actually they were mocking you.

[Tenbatsuzen]

Actually they were mocking you.

I know, I think they thought I came up with the Figjam nickname or something. That's funny.

[spoon]

Matty thinks we thought.....

BAHAHAHAHAHAAHAH!

1+1+1+2

[hanso]

Some hype over Tiger winning an event a few weeks going into the masters, and carry over into a possible green jacket win as well.

However no reports have been made that all the top players took a pass on the event he won.

[spoon]

you can't be surprised by that

[hanso]

you can't be surprised by that

I was though as I did think at least some would put the info out. I only heard about it before the start of Arnie's event.


I still hold on to a thread of hope for the media.

[Snoogans]

Some hype over Tiger winning an event a few weeks going into the masters, and carry over into a possible green jacket win as well.

However no reports have been made that all the top players took a pass on the event he won.

cause not all the top players took a pass on it. the euro guys dont play it and the only top american who didnt play it was Dustin Johnson cause he is injured. There was a pretty good amount of talent in the field tiger won, including a bunch of major winners. lets not just throw it out like he won the Mayakoba Classic or something

[A.J.]

No.

[cougarjake13]

I just hope he's close on Sunday so I got something to watch

[CountryBob]

So weird not seeing blooming flowers and bushes at the Masters this year - spring came early...

[sailor]

I just hope he's close on Sunday so I got something to watch

Why do you only care about him?

[Snoogans]

tiger about to start amen corner. you can watch it live online at Masters.com. They have 2 featured groups, plus coverage of amen corner and 14 and 15th holes.

Amen Corner is 11, 12 and 13 for anyone who didnt know

[Snoogans]

the course looks fuckin weird withou all the flowers. early spring bloomed them already so they are gone now. Place is still beautiful, just looks weird

[A.J.]

"Hello friends."

[hanso]

http://i.imgur.com/yfRdZ.gif


Tiger Woods 2012 Masters Highlight oh and FU@# SH!%

[spoon]

Why do you only care about him?

no love for FIGJAM?

[hanso]

http://i.imgur.com/USMg6.gif

Your 2012 Masters champ Bubba Watson.