bah humbug the anti xmas thread

[hanso]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/f0b5b7005668-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/07a7c73cb520%20-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/0a2bc7f45310-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/1d45c77faa75%20-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/d65bfa4d6649%20-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/e809f137dc05%20-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/9e57da20fdd5-santa%20funny.jpg
Is the season getting to you? Want to rant? Post here.
Find some kewl/odd/funny/sexy xmas kinda stuff? Post here.
@ bah humbug the anti xmas thread.

[jauble]

I loathe, LOATHE Xmas music. I worked at a Best Buy when I was 18 in the Audio/Video department and we were told that all of the receivers had to be tuned into the station that was switching formats and played all christmas music all the time. There really only have to be 30 songs total and they fucking looped. There are so many songs/artists that I hate overall because I worked there.

[yojimbo7248]

this burning Santa is fantastic. I think we should burn Santas in Burning Man/Wicker Man type rituals. It would be reconnecting Christmas to its pagan origins

[TooLowBrow]

Fart!:help:

[midwestjeff]

I think we should burn Santas in Burning Man/Wicker Man type rituals. It would be reconnecting Christmas to its pagan origins

Will there be orgies?

If so, I have matches.

[yojimbo7248]

Fart!:help:


I'm telling mod on you

[biggestmexi]

im so going to be all up in this thread

[yojimbo7248]

Will there be orgies?

If so, I have matches.

hell yeah, what's the fun of a pagan ritual without the nudity and orgy.

[KingGeno]

I've been unemployed since July, so buying gifts ain't helping my shit. Can't find a fucking job, even though I'm an engineer. I hope it picks up in January after December firings.

[hanso]

More and longer red lights in all directions.
As well as more and longer ad breaks on the car radio.
UGH!



good luck k.g.

[weekapaugjz]

http://www.dvd.net.au/movies/f/04019-3.jpg

[KingGeno]

http://i130.photobucket.com/albums/p277/Horror_Brain2/crypt_all.jpg

[boosterp]

This is my kind of thread.

[red_red_red]

This is my kind of thread.
you're a mean one, boosterp grinch

[boosterp]

you're a mean one, boosterp grinch

:innocent:

[biggirl]

holiday hell has begun. our tree has tipped over about 6 times now. It was 75% undecorated by this morning. Ryan went to town and bought a new stand. I redecorated it this morning. if it falls over again I am throwing the whole thing in the garbage.....ornaments and all.

I stepped on 2 ornament hooks about 5 minutes ago. The baby I watch ate 2 fake holly berries and choked. She's ok now.

I am behind in every aspect of getting ready for christmas. I think it's going to be a simple year this year.

On a positive note: I can't wait for Christmas Eve. It's the only day/night of the holidays that I enjoy. It's just Ryan, our kids, and I. We make steak and shrimp every year, enjoy sparkling wine and watch the kids open their gifts. We make a fire, put the kids to bed and play santa...and then pass out in bed from pure exhaustion.

[NateCantDance]

Fuck this holiday. The weather sucks. The crowds suck. The food sucks. The music sucks. Fuck Christmas decorations. Most of them look like grade school art projects, and I refuse to spend any time at all freezing my ass off while nailing cheesy blinking lights to my house, only to have to spend the same amount of time taking them down in a month. Fuck that.

Fuck seeing those "twice a year" relatives again only a month after you saw them last time. "So Bob, what's new since Thanksgiving? Nothing? Well good talkin' to ya! Here's a socket set I bought on sale at Sears! Merry Christmas! See ya next November!"

Fuck making me spend money on gifts in the first place. My wife buys whatever she needs though out the year and my kids get spoiled all year long, but yet I have to find a gift for you that you'll like and I can afford, yet haven't already bought for you. Our house is already overflowing with shit you don't like already, let's add more! WTF? And everybody else on my Christmas list probably shouldn't be getting my money anyway. If you're not part of my immediate family, I am probably completely unqualified to be buying you a gift. Likewise, the gift you bought me sucks balls and is going into the garbage as soon as you leave.

Merry fucking Christmas!
How about next year, instead of wasting a bunch of money on shit we both hate, how about we cut out the middle man and just by yourself a kick ass present? Then we both win.

[boosterp]

I have a great family and I am fine with seeing some of them twice a year. Since my grandparents died, other than my mom I ignore that side as if they do not exist. When younger and in the military I would work over x-mas giving my guys time off so it was never a big deal. When I was married and had a step-daughter it did matter for her so I would get into the spirit a week ahead just for her. Most of my family gets into the holidays, I guess I am sort of a black sheep.

[RhinoinMN]

Fuck this holiday. The weather sucks. The crowds suck. The food sucks. The music sucks. Fuck Christmas decorations. Most of them look like grade school art projects, and I refuse to spend any time at all freezing my ass off while nailing cheesy blinking lights to my house, only to have to spend the same amount of time taking them down in a month. Fuck that.

Fuck seeing those "twice a year" relatives again only a month after you saw them last time. "So Bob, what's new since Thanksgiving? Nothing? Well good talkin' to ya! Here's a socket set I bought on sale at Sears! Merry Christmas! See ya next November!"

Fuck making me spend money on gifts in the first place. My wife buys whatever she needs though out the year and my kids get spoiled all year long, but yet I have to find a gift for you that you'll like and I can afford, yet haven't already bought for you. Our house is already overflowing with shit you don't like already, let's add more! WTF? And everybody else on my Christmas list probably shouldn't be getting my money anyway. If you're not part of my immediate family, I am probably completely unqualified to be buying you a gift. Likewise, the gift you bought me sucks balls and is going into the garbage as soon as you leave.

Merry fucking Christmas!
How about next year, instead of wasting a bunch of money on shit we both hate, how about we cut out the middle man and just by yourself a kick ass present? Then we both win.

I am taking this back.

http://www.thinkgeek.com/images/products/zoom/my-stapler.jpg

oh, I'm taking this back too cuz I guess my ideas suck.

http://www.quickpwn.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/verizon-droid-phone.jpg

[landarch]

I was done with this year's holiday season the second I heard some douche on TV call black Friday the official beginning of the 2009 spending season.

[NateCantDance]

oh, I'm taking this back too cuz I guess my ideas suck.

http://www.quickpwn.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/verizon-droid-phone.jpg

I take it all back!

[yojimbo7248]

Fuck this holiday. The weather sucks. The crowds suck. The food sucks. The music sucks. Fuck Christmas decorations. Most of them look like grade school art projects, and I refuse to spend any time at all freezing my ass off while nailing cheesy blinking lights to my house, only to have to spend the same amount of time taking them down in a month. Fuck that.

Fuck seeing those "twice a year" relatives again only a month after you saw them last time. "So Bob, what's new since Thanksgiving? Nothing? Well good talkin' to ya! Here's a socket set I bought on sale at Sears! Merry Christmas! See ya next November!"

Fuck making me spend money on gifts in the first place. My wife buys whatever she needs though out the year and my kids get spoiled all year long, but yet I have to find a gift for you that you'll like and I can afford, yet haven't already bought for you. Our house is already overflowing with shit you don't like already, let's add more! WTF? And everybody else on my Christmas list probably shouldn't be getting my money anyway. If you're not part of my immediate family, I am probably completely unqualified to be buying you a gift. Likewise, the gift you bought me sucks balls and is going into the garbage as soon as you leave.

Merry fucking Christmas!
How about next year, instead of wasting a bunch of money on shit we both hate, how about we cut out the middle man and just by yourself a kick ass present? Then we both win.

:clap::clap::clap:

just excellent. couldn't agree more. I especially like the "hey, what have you been up to since Thanksgiving?" ha! so true

[lleeder]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/f0b5b7005668-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/07a7c73cb520%20-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/0a2bc7f45310-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/1d45c77faa75%20-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/d65bfa4d6649%20-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/e809f137dc05%20-santa%20funny.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/9e57da20fdd5-santa%20funny.jpg
Is the season getting to you? Want to rant? Post here.
Find some kewl/odd/funny/sexy xmas kinda stuff? Post here.
@ bah humbug the anti xmas thread.

http://marriageconfessions.files.wordpress.com/2009/01/stay-puft-marshmallow-man.jpg

[Contra]

This thread is horrible! Who hates Christmas?! Degenerates, that's who!

Well saying that I could see this thread being popular, but I'm still totally against it!

[GregoryJoseph]

I don't hate Christmas, just what it's become.

It's been so cheapened by retailers and ad campaigns that it's lost a lot of its spirit.

I hate the people who buy into this bastardization almost as much.

[Dude!]

I don't hate Christmas, just what it's become.

It's been so cheapened by retailers and ad campaigns that it's lost a lot of its spirit.

I hate the people who buy into this bastardization almost as much.

santa claus should lose
a lot of weight

like our president has

[GregoryJoseph]

santa claus should lose
a lot of weight

like our president has

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/XU8IQqcq270&hl=en_US&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/XU8IQqcq270&hl=en_US&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

[A.J.]

The only good thing about Christmas is the plethora of board-related holiday parties to choose from!

[hanso]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/b7d434993be0%20xmas.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/da422475c34f%20xmas.jpg

[Contra]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/b7d434993be0%20xmas.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/da422475c34f%20xmas.jpg

See! Christmas is wonderful!

[hanso]

Penguins have nothing to do with xmas.
The one on the left looks evil.

The cat hates xmas
And the hat also

[Recyclerz]

But Thanksgiving to Dec. 25 is the only time I can wear my mistletoe belt buckle and not have it be douche-y!


:wink:

[hanso]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/508055f4aa05-%20anti%20xmas.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/e8dcf82aa336-anti%20xmas.jpg

[~Katja~]

seasons's greetings from Mike the teacher
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/J4ppFRIX8KM&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/J4ppFRIX8KM&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

[boosterp]

seasons's greetings from Mike the teacher
<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/J4ppFRIX8KM&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowScriptAccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/J4ppFRIX8KM&color1=0xb1b1b1&color2=0xcfcfcf&hl=en_US&feature=player_embedded&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowfullscreen="true" allowScriptAccess="always" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Needs a little work.

[hanso]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/1259405885_600_ph-xmas%20sexy.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/nkw-sexy%20xmas.jpeg


http://i.fhqhosting.com/041%20anti%20xmas.jpg
The smell of Christ is compelling

[hanso]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/ncountdownoddball091207test%20funny.gif
Santa Drowns Bad Girls

[hanso]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/00a277fb4711%20anti%20xmas.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/014585db9bf7%20anti%20xmas.jpg
http://i.fhqhosting.com/ccbe00dbf1fd%20anti%20xmas.jpg

[~Katja~]

http://i.fhqhosting.com/014585db9bf7%20anti%20xmas.jpg


foster has a friend who really did that.

[grlNIN]

I don't hate Christmas, just what it's become.

It's been so cheapened by retailers and ad campaigns that it's lost a lot of its spirit.

I hate the people who buy into this bastardization almost as much.

When was Christmas ever not about retailers, sales, what your kids will get over their friends and how you can outdo your fellow man?

Christmas spirit is as much a fallacy as God.

[~Katja~]

When was Christmas ever not about retailers, sales, what your kids will get over their friends and how you can outdo your fellow man?

Christmas spirit is as much a fallacy as God.
when Greg was young

[grlNIN]

when Greg was young

Doubt it, BC means "Before Christ".

[GregoryJoseph]

foster has a friend

I find that hard to believe...

[~Katja~]

Doubt it, BC means "Before Christ".
well, I wasn't gonna break out the sad east german stories, but when we were kids it was about the season and traditions. We had no luxuries nor religion, it was simply about families gathering together, making small mostly home made presents or you would get clothing items you needed for the coming year anyway, and we were excited to have oranges and walnuts under the tree. The smell of incents and cookies and lots of candle lights.
There was no advertising back then, there was no commercial side, and it was a wonderful and exciting time for us as kids none the less!

[midwestjeff]

And then the dirty jews ruined everything.

[grlNIN]

"small handcrafted presents" aka little, gold stars.

[~Katja~]

"small handcrafted presents" aka little, gold stars.
brush up on your history

[dickydean]

I don't hate Christmas once it gets here but I do hate the weeks before hand. I think I've always found it stressfull:flush:

[grlNIN]

brush up on your history

"Your" implies that it is "mine", which it is not, because i'm not a filthy German.

Brush up on your humor.

[~Katja~]

"Your" implies that it is "mine", which it is not, because i'm not a filthy German.

Brush up on your humor.
your joke makes sense and is funny if I grew up in WWII. Jews were long gone when I was a kid!



(and "your" also implies that it is YOUR knowledge, sorry I skipped one word and you did not understand, I'll be more specific for you in the future)

[grlNIN]

your joke makes sense and is funny if I grew up in WWII. Jews were long gone when I was a kid!

"Jews were long gone when i was a kid"

Are you sure? Maybe you should brush up on your history, unless that was just wishful thinking.

[~Katja~]

"Jews were long gone when i was a kid"

Are you sure? Maybe you should brush up on your history, unless that was just wishful thinking.

I am pretty sure we had a lot of russian soldiers in our rounds, and what smart jew would have come back or stayed in EAST germany anyway? If any, they were in the west where the wealth was.

I merely disproved your point that Christmas has not always been commercial and still is in some countries around the world. Since you have no smart reply to that so you pick on grammar instead to battle an empty battle and show me how intelligent you are. Not for nothing, your comment to Greg's post was not funny in the least either, so don't even bother pointing out my "german" sense of humor.

I get it, you hate me and every female on this board and have to be a bitch no matter what, just keep it to yourself, it bores me.

[Charlie_Don't_Surf]

well, I wasn't gonna break out the sad east german stories, but when we were kids it was about the season and traditions. We had no luxuries nor religion, it was simply about families gathering together, making small mostly home made presents or you would get clothing items you needed for the coming year anyway, and we were excited to have oranges and walnuts under the tree. The smell of incents and cookies and lots of candle lights.
There was no advertising back then, there was no commercial side, and it was a wonderful and exciting time for us as kids none the less!

And then that fuccin Von Trapp family came along with all their singing.

[~Katja~]

And then that fuccin Von Trapp family came along with all their singing.
that's why we deported her austrian ass and sent the family to come live with David Hasselhoff in the US. More joy to you!

[Charlie_Don't_Surf]

that's why we deported her austrian ass and sent the family to come live with David Hasselhoff in the US. More joy to you!

Hahaha!! :lol:

Can't water down your history with that thinned out Austrian blood.

[DOHO@HOME]

Bah Mutha Fuckin Humbug All You Cock Suckas

[hanso]

"small handcrafted presents" aka little, gold stars.

Ouch.


My own Jew joke omitted by my own intention.
Hans decides to fly right this time
:innocent:

[jauble]

I bought all my shitty gifts and picked myself up a nice shirt.

http://i45.tinypic.com/33aujki.jpg

I don't have a dress code at work if there are not clients visiting so I wore this today. I have found that 10 percent of upper management got the shirt. Promotion here I come.

[hanso]

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Happy Life Day
This is what should be played every year.

[hanso]

http://img190.imageshack.us/img190/9840/231115xmassexy.jpg
http://img29.imageshack.us/img29/1640/th226946antixmassexy.jpg
http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/1759/0e6b18264cfbxmassexy.jpg
http://img29.imageshack.us/img29/2887/1259874461834820045xmas.jpg
http://img706.imageshack.us/img706/9594/1261082969antixmassexy.jpg
http://img195.imageshack.us/img195/4038/1259874497794954178kewl.jpg

[jauble]

I'm cooking for the family so I have some spirit now, but only because the only xmas specials I watched this year was the south park marathon tonight.

Red sleigh down is in my top 5.

[hanso]

http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/4406/531b93c1a2f1santaiswatc.jpg
I ment to switch back to those south parks.

[hanso]

http://img94.imageshack.us/img94/7409/antixmassantacap.gif

[boosterp]

http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/4406/531b93c1a2f1santaiswatc.jpg
I ment to switch back to those south parks.

Fuck Santa!

[KatPw]

I don't hate Christmas, I just hate December 25th which is unfortunately the same day as Christmas. Why couldn't my dad die on Arbor day or something FFS.

[Penelope]

I've fucking had it now. Tired of the walls of snow, tired of shitty songs "Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow, . . . " Enough!

[Foster]

this is the second year in row my mom is in the hospital on Christmas,
it is now an annual event

[KatPw]

this is the second year in row my mom is in the hospital on Christmas,
it is now an annual event

You have got to be kidding me. Hugs to you and your mom, and I'll keep her in my thoughts.

[Foster]

You have got to be kidding me. Hugs to you and your mom, and I'll keep her in my thoughts.

thank you :wub:

[hanso]

Red Peters xmas music is more like it for me.

[hanso]

http://img46.imageshack.us/img46/3863/burnsantaburn.gif
burn santa burn

[hanso]

http://img51.imageshack.us/img51/8881/a75bcb448984xmassexy.jpg

One more for the road.
Happy holiday.

[hanso]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/3014/2884693.jpg

[LZMan1]

fuck the holiday season!

thanskgiving sucks balls.
i abhor christmas music.
christmas fucking sucks hind teet!

lets start with thanksgiving shall we?
so my wife and i got to her parents house on turkey day and we have to sit there and watch her parents fawn all over her cunt sister and her son who is a pathetic disappointment of a grandchild.....the favoritism shown there is enough to make me lose my appetite. i don't even go to my parents house because that's just as bad if not worse. i avoid going to my parents house on thanksgiving like the fucking plague.

christmas: see above
we are well off and buy nice, not extravagant but very nice gifts for everyone.....what do we get in return? SHITTY GIFTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! my lovely sister-in-law and her husband always get me a $75 dollar gift certificate to best buy. WTF!?!?!?!?! $75 why not cough up another $25 and make it a happy # like $100. her parents always hook us up nicely but as i said....the favoritism shown is literally sickening. as for my parents...they do the same shit her parents do only my parents buy us and or 3 kids crap.

my kids are too young to understand why i'm a miserable wretch during the holidays but the oldest is starting to see it and understand. my family is my family and i love them but it doesn't mean i have to like them or spend any extended amount of time with them.



my apologies for my rant but fuck the holidays in general.

[hanso]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/173034/2961634.jpg

The drive at five... traffic is fine for holidays

[Contra]

This thread should be abolished! Christmas is the bestest!

[hanso]

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[spoon]

This thread should be abolished! Christmas is the bestest!

u took ur meds yesterday huh?

[Contra]

u took ur meds yesterday huh?

I'm just filled with christmas joy!

[spoon]

I'm just filled with christmas joy!

Is that your nickname for BigJim? :lol:

[hanso]

Reminds me of the pick up line thread Lol :lol:

[hanso]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/2899/2976374.jpg

Here is Joy now. She has a box for you.

[hanso]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/1147/3010307.jpg

Skiers and snowboarders dressed as Santa during the 11th annual "Santa's Sunday" in Newry, Maine, December 5.The event participants will receive a free lift tickets, if come dressed as Santa Claus and donate $ 10 (or more) at a charity event Club Bethel Rotary.

[hanso]

<iframe title="YouTube video player" class="youtube-player" type="text/html" width="640" height="390" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/HuvHWRsCn5w" frameborder="0"></iframe>

[Zorro]

Because I am such a nice guy I will be in Las Vegas on Christmas Day spreading cheer and making an attempt to lower the 14.3% unemployment rate.

[jennysmurf]

My flights home are routed through Chicago. According to recent weather patterns, it looks like I'll be spending my Christmas in Chicago. *sigh* Chicago should just close down during the winter months.

[angrytruckingguy]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/2899/2976374.jpg

Here is Joy now. She has a box for you.

That means two things.-Peter Griffin

[hanso]

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[hanso]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/2261/3093394.jpg

[hanso]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/291915/3093567.jpg
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[hanso]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/2300/3115438.jpg
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http://www.10pix.ru/img1/404192/3115682.jpg

[hanso]

http://www.10pix.ru/img1/13462/3116290.jpg
http://www.10pix.ru/img1/4257/3116294.jpg

[hanso]

<object width="410" height="341" id="veohFlashPlayer" name="veohFlashPlayer"><param name="movie" value="http://www.veoh.com/static/swf/webplayer/WebPlayer.swf?version=AFrontend.5.5.4.1002&permalinkId=v15259376Te9kjQDM&player=videodetailsembedded&videoAutoPlay=0&id=anonymous"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.veoh.com/static/swf/webplayer/WebPlayer.swf?version=AFrontend.5.5.4.1002&permalinkId=v15259376Te9kjQDM&player=videodetailsembedded&videoAutoPlay=0&id=anonymous" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="410" height="341" id="veohFlashPlayerEmbed" name="veohFlashPlayerEmbed"></embed></object><br /><font size="1">Watch <a href="http://www.veoh.com/browse/videos/category/comedy/watch/v15259376Te9kjQDM">(Ep 20) Rebel With A Claus</a> in <a href="http://www.veoh.com/browse/videos/category/comedy">Comedy</a>&nbsp;&nbsp;|&nbsp;&nbsp;View More <a href="http://www.veoh.com">Free Videos Online at Veoh.com</a></font>

[The Jays]

nope