How should I ask for late reports

[jauble]

So I got to thinking that I'm already bored with the standard way of asking the people I manage for updates and where late reports are. Whats a good way to ask for something at work?

[led37zep]

How have you been doing it up to this point?

[dino_electropolis]

Is that shit ready, or are skulls about to get cracked?

[Bob Impact]

So I got to thinking that I'm already bored with the standard way of asking the people I manage for updates and where late reports are. Whats a good way to ask for something at work?

I usually just say "Hey, how are things going" and then stare at them until they figure it out.

[ToiletCrusher]

"Gimmie that shit, bitch!"

or

"It appears that I haven't received your report. I bet you have been busy as have I and we might have missed each other recently. I will need it by the end of the day tomorrow."

[Jughead]

Its work fill me in on yours?

[torker]

First you need to grow a set. I'd tell you "Go finish it yourself, fuckface", like that.

[Enabler]

"You know dude, tomorrows already the tenth."

http://knol.google.com/k/-/-/2btetwad2hs37/zg6z2l/marty.jpg


Whatever you do, dont be like Marty. Make an example of somebody and the rest will fall in line.

[dino_electropolis]

"You know dude, tomorrows already the tenth."

http://knol.google.com/k/-/-/2btetwad2hs37/zg6z2l/marty.jpg


Whatever you do, dont be like Marty. Make an example of somebody and the rest will fall in line.

HAAAAAAAAAA


i was gonna go with this: TPS reports???
http://i35.photobucket.com/albums/d164/Time2switch/office-space.jpg

[Gvac]

How should I ask for late reports?

There's your problem.

You don't ASK for them, you DEMAND them.

Some fuckers need a kick in the ass from time to time. Don't be afraid to give it to 'em.

[bigredd]

Tell em as honestly as possible that you were reviewing said report and would like schedule a sit down to go over a few things. When they come in to your office, you stretch it out like a bad cop show...pour some water...clear your throat...like three times...oops, I need my planner from the bottom of this pile. After a solid minute of shifting, grunting and general stalling you look at them and say something like "Oh, I assumed you'd bring a copy so we could go over it together". Then when they freaked out I'd pull their windpipe like Swayze in Roadhouse. I'd show it to the other bags of shit that aren't doing their fucking jobs and make the latest one of them CLEAN UP THIS FUCKING MESS OR I SWEAR TO GOD...

[boosterp]

I always had a lecture planned. Usually though I improvised and would say something like: "Do you know when I needed that spreadsheet? Why the delay and how can we prevent delays in the future?" After once or twice I had my data on time unless we were writing for another grant/project or applying for another one, then delays take back seat to money and further research.

[kdubya]

Is that shit ready, or are skulls about to get cracked?

I am gonna try this with my staff.

[TooLowBrow]

I am gonna try this with my staff.

http://www.lewrockwell.com/blog/gandalf_paul_08.jpg

[jauble]

So far Enabler has the winner. I have good people and bad people, but I find myself saying copies of things to different people. Im a cutthroat motherfucker when I am on the grinder because I can always find someone better (I work for a third party vendor for those who forgot that I am a middle man). The thought that went behind this thread was when I wanted to call someone a slim jim son of cock and then tell them I will bury them in applesauce. Fortunately when I work Sleeves music plays in my head.

[razorboy]

Novelty signing mounted fish.

[jauble]

Also this is over the phone because I am in Pitt and my people are in CT, NH, MA, VT and for some reason LA (the state not the sprawl).

[led37zep]

(I work for a third party vendor for those who forgot that I am a middle man).

http://www.luminomagazine.com/2004.03/spotlight/officespace/images/tom/tom2.jpg

I HAVE PEOPLE SKILLS!!!!!!

[jauble]

http://www.luminomagazine.com/2004.03/spotlight/officespace/images/tom/tom2.jpg

I HAVE PEOPLE SKILLS!!!!!!

someone please turn that quote into a sig pic for me.