CofyCrakCocaine
01-30-2009, 03:24 PM
So's I signed up for an aerobics-type class. I used to do highschool track and work out regularly at the gym, so no big deal right? This is my second real aerobics workout, and they have a group of you standing in a room with Z-100 blasting its tailor-made ear shit, all while you have to bounce in place like a spaz. What I didn't consider was that they bounce around with no stretching, real warm up, and that jumping jacks is really fucking hard to do for twenty minutes straight.
Some complaints I have:
#1: I have no coordination. At one point we had to kick into the air while punching with your fist on the opposite side of the leg. I felt like I was Bearded Riddler.
#2: Running in place. I've never ran in place before in my life (discounting treadmills) and this could be the most moronic fucking activity conceived by man. If you're going to run, wouldn't it be logical that you would want to actually be moving from somewhere to somewhere else? Why the fuck do humans hate Nature so much? Legs are made for transportation goddamn it. Be sure to pump those arms for the full asshole look too!
#3: Big fucking mirrors everywhere. So you can be reminded at all moments of how goddamn dumb you look while you're doing these activities.
#4: I'm tired the rest of the day. The next day, all my limbs are aching. And I really can't shake the feeling that I burned myself out while looking like an asshole all the while. Oh wait, #3 reminds me that I DID look like an asshole! YaY!
#5: Jumping rope without any jump rope. Take the pretend jumprope, and whip it around and then hop around like a cute bunny!
The asian girl in my class has a nice ase tho.
So who likes aerobics?
Some complaints I have:
#1: I have no coordination. At one point we had to kick into the air while punching with your fist on the opposite side of the leg. I felt like I was Bearded Riddler.
#2: Running in place. I've never ran in place before in my life (discounting treadmills) and this could be the most moronic fucking activity conceived by man. If you're going to run, wouldn't it be logical that you would want to actually be moving from somewhere to somewhere else? Why the fuck do humans hate Nature so much? Legs are made for transportation goddamn it. Be sure to pump those arms for the full asshole look too!
#3: Big fucking mirrors everywhere. So you can be reminded at all moments of how goddamn dumb you look while you're doing these activities.
#4: I'm tired the rest of the day. The next day, all my limbs are aching. And I really can't shake the feeling that I burned myself out while looking like an asshole all the while. Oh wait, #3 reminds me that I DID look like an asshole! YaY!
#5: Jumping rope without any jump rope. Take the pretend jumprope, and whip it around and then hop around like a cute bunny!
The asian girl in my class has a nice ase tho.
So who likes aerobics?