I just caught my dad

[IamPixie]

watching soft core porn. :flush: :surrender:

[drjoek]

Good for the old guy

Skinamax??

[Snoogans]

at least you didnt catch him crankin to some jenna jamison video

[Judge Smails]

Take it from me, whatever you do don't look under his bed.

Or, your modquote'll be "I just touched my dad's jizz"

[Fallon]

A mans got needs.

But damn, ya gotta be careful if someone else is around!

[ChrisTheCop]

Were his socks on?

[IamPixie]

we both just laughed uncomfortably.

[IamPixie]

A mans got needs.

But damn, ya gotta be careful if someone else is around!

I walk down the steps heavy, goddamn it!

[DiabloSammich]

I walk down the steps heavy, goddamn it!


Maybe it's time for Miracle Ear.


How awkward.

[spoon]

He's a guy Pix, we all watch porno too. If he didn't I'd be worried, but walking in on him just watching is no big deal. Now if it was hard porn or he in action then that'd be a HARD memory to erase no doubt.

Cut the man some slack, it's not that big a deal.

[drjoek]

By "caught him watching soft core" ,was there anything else going on?

[Snoogans]

we both just laughed uncomfortably.

whats the old man batting with?

[IamPixie]

He's a guy Pix, we all watch porno too. If he didn't I'd be worried, but walking in on him just watching is no big deal. Now if it was hard porn or he in action then that'd be a HARD memory to erase no doubt.

Cut the man some slack, it's not that big a deal.

obviously he's human or else I wouldn't be here. But I'm his daughter it's different and AWKWARD


By "caught him watching soft core" ,was there anything else going on?

NO. Thank baby Jesus.

[spoon]

whoever put emanuelle in the tags rules

[Fallon]

I walk down the steps heavy, goddamn it!

You should have had your camera. You could have been a youtube star!

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/7eYJQuGxN9w&hl=en"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/7eYJQuGxN9w&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

[Devo37]

I walk down the steps heavy, goddamn it!

with those pixie wings? doubtful. i'd advise you to wear a bell around your neck when walking around the house at night.

or maybe your dad could hook up some trip-wires on the stairs when it's Daddy-Time.

[scottinnj]

Put a IV after the thread title and it'd make a great porn title.

[Coach]

watching soft core porn. :flush: :surrender:

at least you didnt catch him crankin to some jenna jamison video

One of the most memorable calls I was on as an EMT was a guy who stroked out while rubbing one out to a porn in his VCR. There he was: two days dead, rod out, box of tissues by his side, eyes rolled back, and rigor mortis. The daughter is yelling CPR! CPR!..and the cops are giggling as they pull the ejected porno out of the VCR and place it in a plastic bag. Freaking surreal! Not to mention, really embarassing.

[Snoogans]

Did you let him finish at least, Pix?

[midwestjeff]

Did you finish him at least, Pix?

Snoogans, really. Too far.

[IamPixie]

I gonna go bleach my brains.

[led37zep]

Snoogans, really. Too far.

Snoogans is a gentleman and understand protocol.

[spoon]

I gonna go bleach my brains.

http://www.womanrock.com/Ani_DiFranco_Feature_pic.jpg

[FUNKMAN]

I just caught my dad watching soft core porn

http://www.skilesphotography.com/blog/wp-content/crosseyed.jpg

[Snoogans]

http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/MG/192036~Good-bye-Emmanuelle-Posters.jpg

[patsopinion]

hott

[PapaBear]

hott
Now, that's just creepy.:wacko:

[Leticia]

I thought you were gonna say jerkin.

Still pretty icky.


I found my mom and dad's porn when I was 13. It was on a reel. From the 70s. Complete with mustaches and all.

But, ew.

[TheMojoPin]

Did he yell, "GO 'WAY, I'M 'BAITIN'!!!"?

[jonyrotn]

That boring, ho-hum thanksgiving dinner conversation just got a BIG boost..The fly on that wall is gonna LOL till he spits Pepsi out of his little fly nose....

[Friday]

ok.... little tidbit.
she won't mind because she is hanging out in heaven....

but i found some 'dirty books' when i was cleaning out my moms apartment.
hilarity!!!
my friend Sarah read from them while we were cleaning... no illustrations just words.... one was called "Her Brothers Knew Best". It was Awful and funny at the same time.

Parents with sexual functions still intact are just phucked up, maaaaaaan!!

[PapaBear]

ok.... little tidbit.
she won't mind because she is hanging out in heaven....

but i found some 'dirty books' when i was cleaning out my moms apartment.
hilarity!!!
my friend Sarah read from them while we were cleaning... no illustrations just words.... one was called "Her Brothers Knew Best". It was Awful and funny at the same time.

Parents with sexual functions still intact are just phucked up, maaaaaaan!!
My dad used to watch "Love Boat" and "Fantasy Island" religiously. I'd watch with him until my mom told me he only watches them because of the women in bikinis. It was just too creepy for me after that. Of course, it didn't keep me from stealing my dad's Penthouse mags, though. Oh, the fond memories!

[Judge Smails]

Did he yell, "GO 'WAY, I'M 'BAITIN'!!!"?

I bet he could really go for a latte.

http://i227.photobucket.com/albums/dd242/amnesialane27/idiocracy_starbucks.jpg

[patsopinion]

I thought you were gonna say jerkin.

Still pretty icky.


I found my mom and dad's porn when I was 13. It was on a reel. From the 70s. Complete with mustaches and all.

But, ew.

ur parents made porn?

[PanterA]

you think thats bad? I found my dads porn. He had a tranny movie in the mix... It was alright, I give it 2 out of 4 boners.

[Enabler]

http://wearpower.com/images/axis/items/rochelle.png?1193113924

[King Hippos Bandaid]

you know soft core porn is the gateway porn to snuff films

[PanterA]

you know soft core porn is the gateway porn to snuff filmsits the gateway to blue balls if you ask me.

[King Hippos Bandaid]

its the gateway to blue balls if you ask me.

I don't think I asked you though

I am surprised you are awake after the hardcore party which is a Cure concert

[PanterA]

I don't think I asked you though

I am surprised you are awake after the hardcore party which is a Cure concerti got plenty of rest during the last 2 hours...

[TheMojoPin]

i got plenty of rest during the last 2 hours...

Was that when Robert Smith took a break to eat 11 entire pies all by himself?

[Stankfoot]

Was that when Robert Smith took a break to eat 11 entire pies all by himself?

pizza pies?

[TheMojoPin]

pizza pies?

Whatever was fattiest.

[AngelAmy]

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/VCCb87vvK_U&hl=en"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/VCCb87vvK_U&hl=en" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

[PanterA]

Was that when Robert Smith took a break to eat 11 entire pies all by himself?yeah, inbetween the 3 fucking encores.

[spoon]

Pantera caught Hippo's pop wanking! It was dare I say, a connection.

[ahhdurr]

Porno!! :clap:

[britneypablo]

be glad your dad is a human congrats.....be glad he wasnt watching teens get hammered by cattle

[Snoogans]

be glad your dad is a human congrats.....be glad he wasnt watching teens get hammered by cattle

You got that movie? Can I borrow it?

[britneypablo]

i have that one on rent right now, u can come over and watch it but I have to return it soon, and not sticky...so I have to supervise your viewing

[Snoogans]

i have that one on rent right now, u can come over and watch it but I have to return it soon, and not sticky...so I have to supervise your viewing

is there any 2 cattles on 1 scene? Those are my favorite

[britneypablo]

no havent found a lot of those, maybe we should go into a business if there is a high demand for this sort of thing

[Snoogans]

no havent found a lot of those, maybe we should go into a business if there is a high demand for this sort of thing

They dont have any cattle where I live, OR ID OWN THE BUSINESS

[TheMojoPin]

i have that one on rent right now, u can come over and watch it but I have to return it soon, and not sticky...so I have to supervise your viewing

Why would he jack off onto the tape/DVD?

[mikeyboy]

Why would he jack off onto the tape/DVD?

Don't judge.

[Snoogans]

Why would he jack off onto the tape/DVD?

Why you tryin to ruin my supervised masterbating

[TheMojoPin]

Why you tryin to ruin my supervised masterbating

It's like when they try and make pandas mate at the zoo.

[Snoogans]

It's like when they try and make pandas mate at the zoo.

What the fuck does that mean? You cock block Pandas, too?

[TheMojoPin]

Lots of people standing around, taking notes and pictures, cheering for the poor beast to pop wood...but it fails, time and time again.

[Snoogans]

Lots of people standing around, taking notes and pictures, cheering for the poor beast to pop wood...but it fails, time and time again.

maybe for you old man, ive never had a problem

[TheMojoPin]

maybe for you old man, ive never had a problem

Of course not. You're into pandas.

[Snoogans]

Of course not. You're into pandas.

Whatever you need to think about as you are going to bed.

[britneypablo]

YAY FOR SUPERVISED MASTURBATION!!! Im awake entirely to early...i need some *SM*

[jonyrotn]

YAY FOR SUPERVISED MASTURBATION!!! Im awake entirely to early...i need some *SM*Do you need me to fax you a resume?



Watch the freudian slips!

Hey dad, can you pass the masturbate-ohs?:ohmy:
:unsure:I mean mashed potatos..:huh:

[britneypablo]

fax? you can email it, or just show up...im desperate
i dont think its accurate to say i make those kind of slips because i just dont speak in anything thats not sex related, its just me, im a perv...maybe i could use a translator like you though so that when i say i want a cum circus you can tell people what i mean was....well actually now that i think of it, thats exactly want i want...whoops ;)

[Doogie]

I hope it was at least the one based off the Blair Witch Project where the hot chicks go wandering into the woods. God some of those soft core porn movies are just horrid to sit through for the nudity.

[Snoogans]

Do you need me to fax you a resume?



Watch the freudian slips!

Hey dad, can you pass the masturbate-ohs?:ohmy:
:unsure:I mean mashed potatos..:huh:

YOU FUCKIN SCUMBAGS. Between Mojo and his sick Panda shit and this nonsense, I see how you people really are.

[jonyrotn]

YOU FUCKIN SCUMBAGS. Between Mojo and his sick Panda shit and this nonsense, I see how you people really are.
:huh:

[Snoogans]

:huh:

relax chief, go with the joke and read back in the thread

[JustJon]

At least he wasn't watching hardcore...

[PopPop]

I imagine he was embarrassed enough without the , um , incident being posted on the internet. Lets never speak of it again.:ohmy:

[DarkHippie]

Maybe he was watching it for the articles

[DarkHippie]

maybe i could use a translator like you though so that when i say i want a cum circus you can tell people what i mean was....well actually now that i think of it, thats exactly want i want...whoops ;)

Gives a new meaning to the Bearded Lady

[jonyrotn]

relax chief, go with the joke and read back in the threadHeeey!
Okay, you're right..I'll leave ONE for you..Sorry sometimes I get a little selfish..

[Dougie Brootal]

I hope it was at least the one based off the Blair Witch Project where the hot chicks go wandering into the woods. God some of those soft core porn movies are just horrid to sit through for the nudity.

THE BARE WENCH PROJECT! a buddy of mine gave that to me like 10 years ago! hahahaha!

[TheMojoPin]

THE BARE WENCH PROJECT! a buddy of mine gave that to me like 10 years ago! hahahaha!

Wow, almost two years before the movie it's making fun of came out? AMAZING.

[Captain Rooster]

Go Viagra!!!

[lleeder]

Was it interracial porn? I apologize if this was already asked.

[CofyCrakCocaine]

I was having lunch with my old man. Our table was next to stairs. Women in dresses walk up the steps. Dad whistles and goes 'nice view from here my boy'

Another time when I was younger we were at a japanese hibachi restaurant. The chef puts the onions together into that stupid volcano. He goes "ohhh! Mt.Fuji!!!" then he leans forward to me and my dad and whispers "Mt.Pussy!!! Heeheehee" and my fucking dad clapped and gave him a dollar bill

fucking embarrassing. it was a dick shortener.

[patsopinion]

internet term of the day - *SM*

[Marc with a c]

i want to party with your dad

[Yerdaddy]

I hope he wasn't using the same fantasies I use. That would be incest!

[damainer]

Did you at least give him a hand like a good girl