A Gift From Me To You

[Rockvillejoe]

Hey, it's May. In this season of giving, allow me the honor of giving all of you a super way of starting your day. Hell, you all deserve it. Please accept this little pearl of wisdom as my way of saying, "hey, start the day with a smile, it don't cost you nothin but stretchin your lips wide". and by lips, i mean the ones on your mouth. not your vaginal or anal lips.

so here you go:
1) go to your alarm clock.
2) set the time for the alarm to power activate at 7:07 am. now this is important. not 7:08 or 7:06. you will see why in a minute. this is exciting, isn't it?
3) now this is the key. the most important important part: TURN YOUR ALARM CLOCK UPSIDE DOWN FACING YOU.
4) now get ready to start the day with a wry, whimsical smile and just a little extra kick in your gitalong!

I'm not going to tell you what happens. you will have to see for yourself. but get ready to be blown away from the results like I was!!!! LOL! whoops! LOL!!

[Judge Smails]

Anal lips? Seriously, you might consider seeing a doctor if that's what you got back there.

[jeffdwright2001]

Anal lips? Seriously, you might consider seeing a doctor if that's what you got back there.

Overuse of of some Chap's Stick?

[Rockvillejoe]

Overuse of of some Chap's Stick?

if by chapstick you mean prep H, both clear gel and soothing creme. then you are right sir! guilty! LOL. whoops?!

[boobieman]

I hope someone hits you with a alarm clock.....LOL....leave oven lite..stick head in.



SEEEESSSSSSSYA

[Knowledged_one]

It was better when you quit the site

[RhinoinMN]

I hate shitty gifts.

Where do I return this?

[Judge Smails]

I can write HELLO and SHELL OIL upside down on my calculator.

http://www.s4rum4n.info/photos/cats/LOL%20cat.PV__.jpg

[Rockvillejoe]

I hope someone hits you with a alarm clock.....LOL....leave oven lite..stick head in.



SEEEESSSSSSSYA

hey, that's quite an ALARMING STATEMENT.......you'd really, RING MY BELL, if that hit me on the noggin! i'd be UPSIDE DOWN, and LAUGHING OUT LOUD. (catch my drift?) if ya know what i'm sayin.

[Rockvillejoe]

It was better when you quit the site

hey, by popular demand, I"M BACK BABY, and may i say with all due humility and humbleness, and betta than evva, playa!

god, the amount of personal pleas and begging for me to re-adorn this site with my incredible brand of humor not unlike the stylings of an s j perelman or twain, brought me to, may i say with all due respect, tears. i'm welling up right now.

[Jujubees2]

I don't get it. I set my alarm for 7:07 and turned the clock upside down. But when I wake up, I keep thinking it's 1:37.

http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en-commons/thumb/6/68/300px-Wall_clock.jpg

[Rockvillejoe]

I can write HELLO and SHELL OIL upside down on my calculator.

http://www.s4rum4n.info/photos/cats/LOL%20cat.PV__.jpg

BOOB is 8008 i believe. ok that's it. i'm through.

[boobieman]

I never wished a message board catch on fire before..but please oh god in heaven..BURN this thread...Your chipperness and pat from monakie (I can't spell that) answers is making me violently ill.....I hope someone hits you with a clock...and it is attached to a Oldsmobile.



SEEE YAYAYAYAYAYA


Sorry bad day...I think I will stay way.