My Driving Rules

[Tazz1376]

Ok, I have done a lot of driving in the past few days, and other drivers suck. Please follow these rules:

1. A Yield sign is NOT a Stop sign. If no one is coming, don't freaking stop.

2. If you want to drive the speed limit, get the hell out of the left lane.

3. Unless it is weather related, there is NEVER a good reason to drive less than the speed limit on a highway.

4. If you slow down to stare at something on the other side of a highway, and that in turn slows down other cars and causes a rubbernecking delay, you should be shot. There is nothing you can see at 40 MPH, that you can't see at 60.

5. If you don't want to drive at least 60 miles per hour, stay the fuck off the highway.

6. If you are looking for an address, don't drive really slow if there is someone behind you. Drive by the damn house, then turn around when it is convenient. No reason to slow down other people because you are lost.

6. There is no reason to stop for a light that has just turned yellow, unless you are trying to get rear-ended.

7. If you want to turn, but you are in the wrong lane, don't try to nudge your way into the correct lane. You drive in the direction of the lane you are stuck in until you can turn around. Don't fuck up other people's commute because you are an asshole.

8. If you are stuck in traffic that is not moving, do not let cars that are on the entrance ramp enter. If you were in a full elevator, would you let more people in? I think not. If there isn't room for them, don't let them on.

9. Don't honk unless they are about to hit you. Whats the point of blowing your horn for 10 minutes after you get cut off. Thats why people get shot in road rage cases.

10. NEVER pull out in front of someone at an intersection and then proceed to drive 20 miles per hour.

Ok, I feel better now.

<img src=http://tazz1376.homestead.com/files/RFnetTazz2.jpg>
Thanks To WWFallon

This message was edited by Tazz1376 on 12-3-01 @ 7:06 PM

[F1Gm3nT]

I COULDNT AGREE WITH YOU MORE!!! GOD FINALLY SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS ME!!!

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deal wid da matter

[Sheeplovr]

Traffic laws are stupid half of them arnt needed

number 333 its the way to be
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POWER AND CHAOS

[TheGameHHH]

Tazz, you gotta publish those rules in some sort of booklet and hand them out to all the f'n retarded drivers of the world.

IT'S TIME TO PLAY THE GAME-AHHH!

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[Poison Ivy]

I thought it was just me this shit happened to.... :(

People suck

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All these places had their moments, With lovers and friends I still can recall, Some are dead and some are living, In my life I've loved them all.....R.I.P. George Harrison 11/30/01

[Captain Rooster]

I love the people that speed up when you try to pass...they go from 55 to 80 to avoid you passing them...what the fuck do they care? Just keep going 55 and back the fuck off...or I may just shoot you....repeatedly!!!


Man this thread has me sooo pissed off. I hate idiot drivers!!! AAAHHHH

They all seem to be driving on the LIE on Friday night

<img src=http://www.ltrooster.homestead.com/files/hartmanbeer.jpg>
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[Tazz1376]

Three more:

11. If you want to drive slow on the highway, don't drive directly next to someone going the same speed. Stop wasting more than one lane.

12. When making a right turn, you don't have to swerve all the way onto the left side of the road and make a huge sweaping turn, nor do you have to come to a complete stop before you turn.

13. Turn signals. Come on people, they are there for a reason.

<img src=http://tazz1376.homestead.com/files/RFnetTazz2.jpg>
Thanks To WWFallon

[Lisa Croft]

Some bitch stole my spot today. I was sitting RIGHT THERE waiting for someone to pull out and as soon as he does, this hamcunt zooms right in from the other side of the street. I would have gotten out and said something but I was already late for class, so I very appropriately gave her the finger and drove on. I have had my license for exactly ONE MONTH and I already want to kill people. No one has any fucking courtesy anymore.

http://members.aol.com/rnfpantera/lisasig3

[Big Jim]

I have a rule::
IF someone in front of you changes lanes, then fails to turn off their signal, it is ok to honk, high beam them, flip them off or do whatever else it may take until they turn off their signal.

In addition, at a toll booth on the GSP, if you throw in change, even if it is the right amount, and the sign still says "please pay toll" dont sit there honking for 20 minutes, you are still going to get a ticket in the mail.

Furthermore, if forever reason you are stuck in a traffic jam and you are NOT moving, like at a drawbridge, it is ok to roll your windows down, pop into the CD player Automatic for the People, and blast Everybody Hurts, and get out of your car and walk around with a look of despair on your face.

Moreover, if someone passes you, then pulls back into your lane, and procedes to slow down, you may tailgate them to the point where you could read a tattoo on the back of their neck.

Hope this helps!

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GVAC IS MY BIGGEST HERO!!!
SEYUH
*BIG JIM*

[Gvac]

As someone who has had driving related jobs for the better part of my life, there is one thing I must stress to everyone out there. The main purpose of your vehicles headlights is to let others see you more clearly, not the other way around. When I drove a straight job, I can't tell you how many times I nearly side swiped some idiot alongside me on a cloudy, drizzly day because they did not have their lights on. Truck drivers have only their mirrors to rely on, and cars are damned near invisible in a blind spot mirror if their headlights aren't on.

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Special thanks to Lt. Rooster for this masterpiece!

[Gwen]

4. If you slow down to stare at something on the other side of a highway, and that in turn slows down other cars and causes a rubbernecking delay, you should be shot. There is nothing you can see at 40 MPH, that you can't see at 60.


That is so true! Tazz, you dont really say much, but when you go off, its some good f'n stuff!
this hamcunt zooms right in

Is it just me or is hamcunt the greatest word ever?

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Thanks Sheepy!

[RF Godfather]

People do suck!

Nice one Tazzie boy.

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I am the One who reeks of "limited" rockedness! Yoink! Narc! Meow!

THE PROTOTYPE<marquee> RFW UNCROWNED UNDISPUTED WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION!</marquee>

[Tazz1376]

Top. I really hate other drivers.

<img src=http://tazz1376.homestead.com/files/tazz.jpg>
Thanks Rooster

[Brick Jesus]

Tazz, those should be the new Ten Commandments, or as I like to call them Ten Commandments Version 2.0

Disclaimer: The comments of Brick Jesus do not represent the feelings or opinions of any normal individual.

[wilee]

Suggested additions:

When changing lanes in front of someone, don't hit the brakes once you get into the lane.

If you have an exit coming up, get into the appropriate lane beforehand, don't cut across 2-3 lanes of traffic last minute.

<IMG SRC="http://cwjr.home.infi.net/wileegun.gif">

[SweetPea]

Taz- Good topic! Wow stupid drivers really piss me off! I love when people try to sneak in, or if they cut you off to get ahead of you, then get caught at the red light. Or when they fail to stop & get pulled over cause they went through the light! Ha Ha Oh that is the best!

-Gvac- I know what you mean about the lights. My dad is a truck driver, & I used to go to work w/ him over the summers, & that would really piss me off even before I was driving! I always used to yell at people! LoL I was like a little 10 year old kid (wow a whole 6 yrs ago) sticking out of a piggy-back trailor yelling at retarded drivers!

And because of already having road rage at 10, now that Im 16 and I've had my permit since August..the rage has gotten so much worse! People need to F'n learn to drive. Oh & another thing that really gets me is when people try doing other things when driving i.e- talking on their phone, eating, drinking, or fixing hair or make-up. If it's really that important that you must do it PULL the F OVER!

I'm a 16 yr old gurl from L.I....and...I'm the Sweetest Pea in the Pod! :D
-+-Forever feeding the addiction known as RonFez.net!!-+-

[Tazz]

Back to the top and a new addition:

14. Don't just fucking stop in the middle of the road for no reason. If you do, and I end up driving my truck up your ass, its your fault.

<img src=http://tazz1376.homestead.com/files/homersig.gif>

[Doogie]

Everything described here discribes some form of soccer mom who has a "my child is a honor student at..." bumper sticker. God I soooooo badly want to see them crash into a tree and see the little hams inside go flying out the windows to be hit by passing by cars!!! Ugggghhhh I hate those fucking twats on the road...they do everything that Tazz describes...This generation of parents suck!!! Bunch of pussies!!

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"My father would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark and accuse cheasnuts of being lazy...I assure you there is nothing like a shrown scrotum"
Thank you WWF Fallon for the sig

[Tazz]

Not sure who this Tazz1376 schmuck is, but this is a good thread.

I need to top it because it needs to be read (yes, I am modest) and, this actually happened:

14. Don't just fucking stop in the middle of the road for no reason. If you do, and I end up driving my truck up your ass, its your fault.



<img src=http://tazz1376.homestead.com/files/tazz.gif>
Thanks J.R.
I Don't Care About Anyone Else But Me - Drowning Pool

[blakjeezis]

Is it just me or is hamcunt the greatest word ever
I second that motion! Good pick, Gwen, I completely missed it.

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"What was the middle one?" - Otto, A Fish Called Wanda
<marquee>White people are so scared of blakjeezis</marquee>

[TheMojoPin]

If you're driving ANY kind of truck, leave your fucking high beams off. Those of us in actual cars like NOT being blinded when trying to drive at night.

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/mojo.jpg>
"You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."
-TMP

[Hawiian shirt craig]

this is why i kill everyone
that pisses me off, but its
ethical b/c i eat what i kill.


-Hawiian Shirt Craig
THIS IS WHY WE CAN'T HAVE NICE THINGS!!

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San Diego Chargers 4-0

[F1Gm3nT]

Canadian Taxi drivers know how to drive ... right Tazz?

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"Conquer the devils with a little thing called love!"
- Bob Marley

[A.J.]

I couldn't agree more with 2-5.

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A Skidmark production.

[Tazz]

I love this thread. It's my baby.

<img src=http://tazz1376.homestead.com/files/tazz.gif>
Thanks J.R.
I Don't Care About Anyone Else But Me - Drowning Pool

[Doogie]

I just find it curious that you referred to yourself as a schmuck in one of the posts here.

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ADF Fan since day one...this sig rocks!!!
"Impossible is only the failure of imagination"
<marquee behavior=alternate>The Jedi Master and an incredible hound dogga</marquee>

[stickyfingers]

okay i have suggestion for #15 if thats what we are up to"
Do not pull out in front of someone if there is NO ONE BEHIND THEM

crap that gets me...how they can pull out in front of you which just makes you ride their ass when if they waited 3 seconds there is nothing but a clear road


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"lemme tell ya sumpin"

[ozzie]

hamcunt
F'ing GREAT word!

Oh yeah, I think I'll be using this little gem! (with proper credit of course!)

"hamcunt"rLara Croftc2001

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Mucho appreciation for the sig CZM!

This message was edited by ozzie10_86 on 2-11-03 @ 11:23 AM

[TeRRoR]

1. A Yield sign is NOT a Stop sign. If no one is coming, don't freaking stop.

2. If you want to drive the speed limit, get the hell out of the left lane.

3. Unless it is weather related, there is NEVER a good reason to drive less than the speed limit on a highway.

4. If you slow down to stare at something on the other side of a highway, and that in turn slows down other cars and causes a rubbernecking delay, you should be shot. There is nothing you can see at 40 MPH, that you can't see at 60.

5. If you don't want to drive at least 60 miles per hour, stay the fuck off the highway.

6. If you are looking for an address, don't drive really slow if there is someone behind you. Drive by the damn house, then turn around when it is convenient. No reason to slow down other people because you are lost.

6. There is no reason to stop for a light that has just turned yellow, unless you are trying to get rear-ended.

7. If you want to turn, but you are in the wrong lane, don't try to nudge your way into the correct lane. You drive in the direction of the lane you are stuck in until you can turn around. Don't fuck up other people's commute because you are an asshole.

8. If you are stuck in traffic that is not moving, do not let cars that are on the entrance ramp enter. If you were in a full elevator, would you let more people in? I think not. If there isn't room for them, don't let them on.

9. Don't honk unless they are about to hit you. Whats the point of blowing your horn for 10 minutes after you get cut off. Thats why people get shot in road rage cases.

10. NEVER pull out in front of someone at an intersection and then proceed to drive 20 miles per hour.



actually, let me break this down for ya.

new jersey state law says a yield is the same as a stop sign. you *technically* have to stop at it.

for example, over here on route 18, there is this yield, but for some reason people do not seem to recognize it and just blow it, and yesterday i was almost slammed into by some kid in a rice burner... and im not saying what happened then...(i have horrible roadrage, ask gwen... she will tell you)

Your number 6 i dissagree with. What i do when lookin is ya, i drive a bit slower, but if there is a vehicle behind me, i usually pull to the side or off the road and let them pass. why the F should i drive by and miss where i have to go when i can just do that?

ok, your number 8 i also dissagree with. it is called the zipper affect. you let people in, you will live longer. why ride someone's ass in heavy traffic to just not let 1 or 2 cars in... granted, i may not do it all the time but i do do it.

OHHH! and screw you #9. my hand will sit on my horn for as long as i keep it there. i do not give a F who i am honkin at. i've even done it to cops. if i dont like how you are driving, either you get my highbeams or my horn....

also, here is a question... when someone is pulling out onto a road, they pull out REALLY fast to get infront of you right, but they accelerate really slow... i do not get that... yet, they dont want you to hit them...

see folks, THIS is why i always keep glass bottles in my vehicle.

<img src=http://home.ix.netcom.com/~camman/_uimages/TeRRor.gif>
thanks to jerseyrich for the sig

<B>NO MESS, NO FUSS, JUST PURE IMPACT</B>

[Bob Impact]

How about this one. . . .
I work at a university with strict rules about parking, and this morning I pull into the STAFF ONLY lot and drive directly to the one open spot, only to be nearly hit by a young female with a student pass. She takes the spot, and I, because i'm such a warm hearted person, stop my car directly in front of hers.

Me: "Excuse me miss, can you read?"

Her: Yeaaaah.

Me: Can you read what that sign says to me real quick?

Her: [Insert University Here] Faculty/Staff Parking ONLY.

Me: Now turn around and read your parking permit. . . .

Her: Student.

Me: Now what does mine say?

Her: Faculty/Staff.

Me: Exactly, get the FUCK out of my SPACE.

.
.
.
.


Hey, it was cold.

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Ron and Fez live in NYC or the real nightmare begins.</center>

[ThePointer]

After reading this post, Damn I long for the days when a car was made of steel and weighed 35oo pounds and had a 454 4 barrel Carb. Tank protection and speed. WHAT A MIX

you have two choices: Castration or a one way ticket to New York

[FiveB247]

3 rights make a left?!

[Lisa Croft]

Okay, I have now been a licensed driver for 1 year and 3 months and I can confidently say that I am a better driver than at least 60% of people on the road. How?!? My pet peeve is stop signs. I was in the car with my mother driving last week and she STOPPED at every intersection, even when she had NO STOP SIGN! I asked why and she said "I'm scared! I don't trust other people." If you are THAT scared, you should not be driving. It's people like this that cause accidents. Also, I hate people who stop at a 4-way stop sign as long as they stop at a regular stop sign. If I approach a 4-way and there is no one already stopped at the other 3 signs, I GO!

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/laracroft.gif>

[stickyfingers]

i hate people that think they are a good driver because they "have never been in an accident"...that's the point of driving...accident's arent supposed to happen, thats why they are called accidents

Also, why do people feel the need to fan out at a red light so that they are not one car length behind where they move to...if you see the lane next to you open and you move there, you'd better plan on driving faster than the person that you pulled up next to otherwise you are screwing everyone else buy clogging up a lane....This gets to me b/c i try to time a red light so that i don't have to make the full stop but then someone pulls into my lane up ahead of me and goes slower than the lane they pulled out of...god dammit, i want to hook up a neon sign that i can turn on on the front of my car that reads "DumbAss"

"lemme tell ya sumpin" -CW

[ozzie]

i want to hook up a neon sign that i can turn on on the front of my car that reads "DumbAss"
That's been my dream since I was a kid! I've always wanted to create some form of lighted sign (or scrolling marquee) with pre-programmed messages on both the front and back of my car. I'm thinkin' I'd wear out the following...

(for the FRONT)

- PASS, OR GET THE FUCK OVER!
- THE SPEED LIMIT IS (fill in the blank), DUMBASS!
- STOP SIGHTSEEING AND F'ING GO!
- TURN OFF YOUR GODDAMMED TURN SIGNAL!

(for the back)

- I CAN'T GO ANY FASTER THAN THE CARS IN FRONT OF ME DICKHEAD, BACK THE FUCK OFF!
- DIM THOSE LIGHTS OR I'LL DIM THEM FOR YOU!
- Hey there cutie! Honk if you're single! :-X


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Mucho appreciation for the sig CZM!

[Geppetto]

I think Taz just rewrote the drivers test. Amen

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