Zombie prepardness [Archive] - RonFez.net Messageboard

Sheeplovr

07-09-2006, 04:36 PM

I've had a zombie plan since i was in 3rd grade every time i move i have ot make a newp lan but i always have oneI have the perfect zombie weapon sounds silly but till you've swung one you know how it isa Golf Puttersolid small wont rust and has a good grip so it wont side out of your hands when you get covered in chuncky zombie bloodnow
i would have a gun the only reason i've ever thought to want a gun is
incase zombie attack but you always need bullets golf putter you dont
need anything but a good swingnow i sleep with the putter under
my bed easy acress there was a time where i actully slept wiht the
putter next to me but i got older and decided as long as its 3 seconds
away im cooli always mesure my sdaftey anyplace by how far away
i am form a grave yard and or river cause you know when the zombies
come there will be weird zombie water zombies from many of missing
people that never were foundnow i know itsi mposible for zombies
ot break threw the dirt like in movies so the real threat is people
like one zombie experment monkey or somethign maybe a dog gets out
bites a perosn then the people go and bite then we are over runnow zombies move slow dammit not fast liek the gaywad remakeso
anyways always have a pair of good fitting  boots in your owner
ship because if you knock um down you can always stomp in the brains be
sure to have spare wood around zombies cant break wood they are weak
glass they can break not double pain glass though but lets say a normal
hosue window on the bottom floor watch out for that they can pick up
rocks zombies hunt in packs and can problem solve they can
problem solve slowly much like a retarded kid tryingto get at a cookie
jar they will find a way and youll have crumbs on the floorzombies
smell so they can never sneak up on you they are covered in blood piss
dead meat shit and everything else they are filthy youd smell them the
basic plan is have  the supplies knwo the rules find a safe zone
on a second floor of a home with object handy to baracade the home if
you have to leave have a rout to the nearest hunting store or wallmart
there no  way to have a stock supplie of foods no matter what it
will run out the only way to live is to spread the plan and fight all the zombies only problem is we will invnet a zombie killign robot but the robot will turn on usteam with the zombies and we will have zombie cyborgs and we cant win thenbasicly we are fucked to the zombie cyborg overlords

Tall_James

07-09-2006, 04:37 PM

kdubya wrote: If you woke up and found yourself in a world over run with zombie (good old fasion slow zombies) what is the one thing you would grab from your house as you head out to bust zombie ass. I have to say, this is one of the better "what-if" threads that I have seen here.  Kudos.Based on what I have available currently, I would choose my gas-powered Craftsman Weed Whacker until I could locate (or steal) a powerful firearm.

INFOSTUD

07-09-2006, 04:40 PM

I  have a Zombie Ready Kit for this very purpose.  My unwashed gym clothes should do the treat.  The gym socks would act as grenades.  I slip the clothes back on and everything within 20 feet of me dies instantly.  The stench is so strong it can even kill the undead.  "Undead" is that a blatant redudancy.

kdubya

07-09-2006, 05:02 PM

I would grab my .45 semi auto handgun and as much ammo as I can carry. I must admit when I bought it I went with a .45 vs a 9 mill because I once read a .45 is better for killing zombies.I also had a friend with an interseting idea. He said that since zombies are dead their skin and such is weak. He said a paintball gun with the valve opened up all the way with frozen paintballs could go right through a zombies head. If you could pull that off that would be a sweet zombie killer.

docgoblin

07-09-2006, 05:10 PM

Sheeplovr wrote: I've had a zombie plan since i was in 3rd grade every time i move i have ot make a newp lan but i always have oneI have the perfect zombie weapon sounds silly but till you've swung one you know how it isa Golf Puttersolid small wont rust and has a good grip so it wont side out of your hands when you get covered in chuncky zombie bloodnow
i would have a gun the only reason i've ever thought to want a gun is
incase zombie attack but you always need bullets golf putter you dont
need anything but a good swingnow i sleep with the putter under
my bed easy acress there was a time where i actully slept wiht the
putter next to me but i got older and decided as long as its 3 seconds
away im cooli always mesure my sdaftey anyplace by how far away
i am form a grave yard and or river cause you know when the zombies
come there will be weird zombie water zombies from many of missing
people that never were foundnow i know itsi mposible for zombies
ot break threw the dirt like in movies so the real threat is people
like one zombie experment monkey or somethign maybe a dog gets out
bites a perosn then the people go and bite then we are over runnow zombies move slow dammit not fast liek the gaywad remakeso
anyways always have a pair of good fitting boots in your owner
ship because if you knock um down you can always stomp in the brains be
sure to have spare wood around zombies cant break wood they are weak
glass they can break not double pain glass though but lets say a normal
hosue window on the bottom floor watch out for that they can pick up
rocks zombies hunt in packs and can problem solve they can
problem solve slowly much like a retarded kid tryingto get at a cookie
jar they will find a way and youll have crumbs on the floorzombies
smell so they can never sneak up on you they are covered in blood piss
dead meat shit and everything else they are filthy youd smell them the
basic plan is have the supplies knwo the rules find a safe zone
on a second floor of a home with object handy to baracade the home if
you have to leave have a rout to the nearest hunting store or wallmart
there no way to have a stock supplie of foods no matter what it
will run out the only way to live is to spread the plan and fight all the zombies only problem is we will invnet a zombie killign robot but the robot will turn on usteam with the zombies and we will have zombie cyborgs and we cant win thenbasicly we are fucked to the zombie cyborg overlords   You havethought about this way too much!

Tenbatsuzen

07-09-2006, 05:12 PM

Yo. She-bitch. Let's go.

Tenbatsuzen

07-09-2006, 05:14 PM

Now listen up, you primitive screwheads. See this? This... is my
boomstick! The 12-gauge double-barreled Remington. S-Mart's top of the
line. You can find this in the sporting goods department. That's right,
this sweet baby was made in Grand Rapids, Michigan. Retails for about
$109.95. It's got a walnut stock, cobalt blue steel, and a hair
trigger. That's right. Shop smart. Shop S-Mart. You *got* that?

LordJezo

07-09-2006, 05:14 PM

If you guys are really serious about getting yourself and family ready for a zombie attack I would highly recommend getting yourself a copy of this book.. <a target="_blank" href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1400049628/sr=8-1/qid=1152490459/ref=pd_bbs_1/104-9572112-9987105?ie=UTF8">The Zombie Survival Guide : Complete Protection from the Living Dead </a>I have a copy and it is filled with a lot of great information and can really prepare you in the event that a disaster does occur. This review says it best:There is no satire or humor here, but a bleak, realistic survivalist
guide to slugging it through a Night Of The Living Dead scenario
complete with detailed, realistic check lists. Get it if you really want to be prepared.  This is not a humor book, it's pretty much the only book out there that can actually give you good info for this sort of thing. 

This message was edited by LordJezo on 7-9-06 @ 9:17 PM

kellermcgee21

07-09-2006, 05:25 PM

LordJezo wrote:  I have a copy and it is filled with a lot of great information and can really prepare you in the event that a disaster does occur.i think everyone can agree that a zombie attack will occur it's only a question of when

This message was edited by kellermcgee21 on 7-9-06 @ 9:25 PM

FUNKMAN

07-09-2006, 05:28 PM

kdubya

07-09-2006, 05:40 PM

Here is my zombie kit. I must point out that everything pictured was in arms length of where I sit right now.<img src="http://xs303.xs.to/xs303/06281/aaa11111.JPG" border="0" />

Se7en

07-09-2006, 05:40 PM

I've got a small collection of medieval weapons.  So first thing I'd grab is one of them.  But I'd have to decide upon whether to take a sword or the axe.  Hmm.  Probably the axe.

DirtyJersey

07-09-2006, 05:46 PM

Tenbatsuzen wrote: Yo.She-bitch.Let's go. Well hello Mr. Fancy PantsI would grab my Hank Aaron Wooden Baseball Bat.

sr71blackbird

07-09-2006, 05:56 PM

I keep a Winchester Defender with an 8 shot magazine in my bedroom and a drawer full of shells for just this scenario.<img height="101" src="http://www.geocities.com/Pentagon/Quarters/7050/Winchesterdefender.jpg" width="499" border="0" />If the zombies attacked, I would have this with me and as much ammo as I could carry, and for close quarters fighting, I would use a mace:<img height="328" src="http://www.fisk-knives.com/Mace.jpg" width="497" border="0" /> It would be best if I had a light sabre, but they have not been prefected yet!

DarkHippie

07-09-2006, 06:01 PM

sr71blackbird wrote: I keep a Winchester Defender with an 8 shot magazine in my bedroom and a drawer full of shells for just this scenario.<img height="101" src="http://www.geocities.com/Pentagon/Quarters/7050/Winchesterdefender.jpg" width="499" border="0" />If the zombies attacked, I would have this with me and as much ammo as I could carry, and for close quarters fighting, I would use a mace:<img height="328" src="http://www.fisk-knives.com/Mace.jpg" width="497" border="0" /> It would be best if I had a light sabre, but they have not been prefected yet!The mace is essential, only blunt weapons do full damage against zombies.  I would go with a mace in one hand and the holy symbol of Lathander in the other.  Come on 20!!!

FUNKMAN

07-09-2006, 06:30 PM

suggums

07-09-2006, 07:14 PM

funkman youre cracking me up with thosebut realistically, i'd grab the wooden dowel in my closet i carved into a spear, and then a big ginsu butcher knife as i pass through the kitchen.  both good for ramming through the eye, into the brain.if i had, say, 10 minutes or so to get ready, i'd go dig out my old super soaker-the one with the big backpack water tank, fill that sucker up with gasoline, throw a few bics in the pocket and i'm good to go

JustJon

07-09-2006, 07:16 PM

I would grab my cricket bat, go get my girl from her flat and head for the Winchester.

kdubya

07-09-2006, 07:21 PM

JustJon wrote: I would grab my cricket bat, go get my girl from her flat and head for the Winchester. Don't forget your mum

Tenbatsuzen

07-09-2006, 07:22 PM

JustJon wrote: I would grab my cricket bat, go get my girl from her flat and head for the Winchester.    You could probably stop the armies of the undead with an infinite amount of needless British references.

MobCounty

07-09-2006, 08:20 PM

I have a zombie crushing bar on my  f250 already.. If the shit gets real bad, I plan on covering the windows with tin siding and  sleeping in the cab.   I'll drive town to town and pick you guys up.

Judge Smails

07-09-2006, 08:30 PM

Tenbatsuzen wrote:  JustJon wrote: I would grab my cricket bat, go get my girl from her flat and head for the Winchester.    You could probably stop the armies of the undead with an infinite amount of needless British references.  Is this the end of Zombie Shakespeare?

kdubya

07-09-2006, 09:03 PM

MobCounty wrote: I have a zombie crushing bar on my  f250 already.. If the shit gets real bad, I plan on covering the windows with tin siding and  sleeping in the cab.   I'll drive town to town and pick you guys up.I will hang out in the bed of your truck and pick the undead bastards off with my .45. Then we can share my bottle of SoCo (no homo)

mikeyboy

07-09-2006, 09:43 PM

XMRonFez

07-09-2006, 09:48 PM

I think this thread should be taken much more seriously. People have thought I was crazy to actually have thought this out, but I'm glad to see I'm not the only lunatic.If they are the more modern fast zombies, I would honeslty shoot myself in the head. I could not handle an infected  family member chasing after me like that. I would most likely become a zombie as well...If they are the traditional slower zombies, I have a plan to hide myself in my attic. I can load up with as much supplies as I can and barricade myself up there until the redneck army comes through to clean things up. I would go with a good old fashion Meat Tenderizer. Preferably with a metal handle of course, but they'll do well across someone's head and if you run out of hammer's you can use it to board up the windows...<img height="252" src="http://www.acemart.com/graphics/00000001/products/AAAAMT11.jpg" width="300" border="0" />

This message was edited by XMRonFez on 7-10-06 @ 2:41 PM

Se7en

07-09-2006, 11:48 PM

JustJon wrote: I would grab my cricket bat, go get my girl from her flat and head for the Winchester. You've got some red on you.

Sheeplovr

07-10-2006, 02:12 AM

If they are the more modern fast zombies, I
would honeslty shoot myslef in the head. I could not handle an infected
 family member chasing after me like that. I would most likely become a
zombie as well...don't worry my friendits imposiblefor a zombie ot be fastthey are dead they
are like somebody with a bad flu they just working on the instincts i
do  belive you can throw meat at them a they are hungry and a big
problem nobody factors in is zombies are horny Zombies liek to fuckthey could be trying to rip you to preices but fuck you at the same time see the Peter Jackson movie Braindead or Dead Alive as it's called sometimes thats the first time i saw zombies going at it it makes sence mindless search for food mixed in wiht some boneing my conclusion zombies will fuck you

chili

07-10-2006, 02:57 AM

This one's pretty easy. If zombies attack, get yourself to the nearest Wal-Mart. There's guns, concrete (to build barriers around the openings, perishable and non-perishable food, clothes, etc etc. First block off the entrances and use a ladder and a high shelf to reach the roof. Cut through the roof and plant a sniper on the roof to pick off zombies/signal for help. Set up camping stoves from sporting goods to cook with, while setting up propane tanks around the perimeter as an exterior flamethrower if needed. I think that you could survive the longest in something like a Wal-Mart or any big box chain of that nature.

kdubya

07-10-2006, 06:37 AM

chili wrote: This one's pretty easy. If zombies attack, get yourself to the nearest Wal-Mart. There's guns, concrete (to build barriers around the openings, perishable and non-perishable food, clothes, etc etc. First block off the entrances and use a ladder and a high shelf to reach the roof. Cut through the roof and plant a sniper on the roof to pick off zombies/signal for help. Set up camping stoves from sporting goods to cook with, while setting up propane tanks around the perimeter as an exterior flamethrower if needed. I think that you could survive the longest in something like a Wal-Mart or any big box chain of that nature. Good call, screw the mall, Walmart all the way. Only problem is we will have to stop and grab some porn on the way. I mean you need some good batch material in the down time between attacks.

A.J.

07-10-2006, 06:55 AM

Start with the "best of"<img height="275" src="http://users.aol.com/adrockb/collecti.gif" width="281" border="0" />

MobCounty

07-10-2006, 07:06 AM

chili wrote: This one's pretty easy. If zombies attack, get yourself to the nearest Wal-Mart. There's guns, concrete (to build barriers around the openings, perishable and non-perishable food, clothes, etc etc. First block off the entrances and use a ladder and a high shelf to reach the roof. Cut through the roof and plant a sniper on the roof to pick off zombies/signal for help. Set up camping stoves from sporting goods to cook with, while setting up propane tanks around the perimeter as an exterior flamethrower if needed. I think that you could survive the longest in something like a Wal-Mart or any big box chain of that nature. Yeah, but what about the other 100k people in your area with the same idea? I think we should only let current 'zombie prepardness' members into the box store.  I'm not letting some fat guy with 10 crying kids into the store either.

Jujubees2

07-10-2006, 07:11 AM

I would bring a wooden stake and a silver bullet... no wait, that 's my vampire prepardness kit.My zombie kit is comprised of:<img height="220" src="http://www.sportsnmore.com/baseball/images/easton/bats06/a111407.jpg" width="220" border="0" />as long as they're moving slowly, I can hit them. Anything over 60 mph and I'm toast.

MobCounty

07-10-2006, 07:40 AM

pOOpsHIp

07-10-2006, 08:00 AM

You can hone your shootin' skilz here... http://artscool.cfa.cmu.edu/~lee/deanimator.html

JustJon

07-10-2006, 08:06 AM

Tenbatsuzen wrote: JustJon wrote: I would grab my cricket bat, go get my girl from her flat and head for the Winchester. You could probably stop the armies of the undead with an infinite amount of needless British references.   This one isn't needless, it's mandatory.

chili

07-10-2006, 08:15 AM

MobCounty you bring up a good point about other people scrambling to get to Wal-Mart. While I think that a large percentage of the US population is too dumb to think of boarding up in Wal-Mart, that same ignorant percent are probably the ones who spend the most time in Wal-Mart, so they'd already be there.The funny thing is, if you bring the question of zombies up to the average person they wouldn't take you seriously or have no idea what to do. Most of the good ol boys from where I'm from (SC) would probably be alright, as zombies move slower than deer and are bigger than turkeys and quail. And you know they already own small armories and trucks big enough to run over all the zombies.What's scarier? The zombie invasion or our new redneck overlords who take power after the assault?

kdubya

07-10-2006, 08:44 AM

In have done some research and compiled the following data on peoples reactions to a zombie attack.40% would panic and just run around getting hit by cars or bitten by zombies20% percent will go and check on the zombies to see if they are ok, and get bitten25% percent will listen to the Gov and hold up in their holmes waiting for help.7% percent will getconfused and run around making stakes, hording holy water and melting down the good siler into bullets.3% will be behind the attack, and hold up in their seceret underground bunkers waiting to see their plan for world domination unfold.5% percent will be ready and kick much ass. So we, the 5 percenters, will have all the Wal-marts to ourselves.Keep in mind that of the 5% about 40-50 % will head to the mall because they lack imagination.

This message was edited by kdubya on 7-10-06 @ 12:46 PM

chili

07-10-2006, 09:15 AM

5% eh? Sounds like the 5 percenters, offshoot of black NOI. 5% of the world has true knowledge and tries to educate the world, 15% have the knowledge but try to deceive, and 80% are sheep.

XMRonFez

07-10-2006, 11:08 AM

If movies have taught us anything, I think the two biggest mistakes people would honestly make is Making alot of noise trying to board themselves up, or to go hole up in a Shopping Mall or Wal-Mart, etc...All that hammering is going to bring these stupid things to you. Find somewhere secure, leave the lights off and wait. I don't want to be part of the 25 % that listens to the government. In that situation the government is gone for all I care.Zombies are obviously just looking to eat us, but they were us at one point. All the Guns, Supplies, and Food Wal-Mart can provide will mean nothing when a million Zombie's all with the same idea Smash the walls down... Whether they know your in there or not, they'll remember Wal-Mart from their normal miserable life and head there again...

kdubya

07-10-2006, 11:16 AM

XMRonFez wrote: If movies have taught us anything, I think the two biggest mistakes people would honestly make is Making alot of noise trying to board themselves up, or to go hole up in a Shopping Mall or Wal-Mart, etc...All that hammering is going to bring these stupid things to you. Find somewhere secure, leave the lights off and wait. I don't want to be part of the 25 % that listens to the government. In that situation the government is gone for all I care.Zombies are obviously just looking to eat us, but they were us at one point. All the Guns, Supplies, and Food Wal-Mart can provide will mean nothing when a million Zombie's all with the same idea Smash the walls down... Whether they know your in there or not, they'll remember Wal-Mart from their normal miserable life and head there again...You bring up good points. Here is what I have learned. You hold up while making plans to get to a boat. The boat can get you to an island where there are no zombies. The key is make sure the island is deserted before you pull into to port.Also <a href="http://www.ronfez.net/exec/obidos/search-handle-url/index=books&field-author-exact=Robert%20Kirkman&rank=-relevance,+availability,-daterank/103-5082214-7964631">Robert Kirkman</a> has taught us that zombies identify non-zombies by smell. So keeping quiet isn't as importent as masking your scent. If there are any chemists your might want to start working on some kind of synthetic  zombie scent. I say the key to any thing is a good plan. So folks in the DC metro area, when this hits make your way to Walmart in Mannassas. Walmarts closer in to the city don't carry guns, well at least not as many.  We will re-group and make our next move from there. (but don't tell anyone, it is a seceret, the secert code is "we are drpping zombies like they were 9 years olds")

XMRonFez

07-10-2006, 11:25 AM

That is absolutely True. If you cover yourself with the bood and intestines of another Zombie, they will most likely think you are one of them. A few acting lessons on how to bring out your inner zombie and all will be well. We are dropping Zombies like they are 9 year olds, brings up a whole new topic. How many 9 year old zombies could you take out?

MobCounty

07-10-2006, 12:45 PM

kdubya wrote: to get to a boat. The boat can get you to an island where there are no zombies. The key is make sure the island is deserted before you pull into to port.There are a couple records of zombies walking under water. I'm not sure if a water borne zombie is a real zombie or a fantasy zombie.I'm thinking keeping on the go will be key to survival.  I say we get giant coal trucks and convert them to solar, when we are not running down the seas of zombies, we can live in a house trailer in the bed.<img height="220" src="http://www.lord.com/Portals/4/caterpillar_797_dump_truck.jpg" width="275" border="0" />

kdubya

07-10-2006, 12:48 PM

MobCounty wrote: kdubya wrote: to get to a boat. The boat can get you to an island where there are no zombies. The key is make sure the island is deserted before you pull into to port.There are a couple records of zombies walking under water. I'm not sure if a water borne zombie is a real zombie or a fantasy zombie.I'm thinking keeping on the go will be key to survival.  I say we get giant coal trucks and convert them to solar, when we are not running down the seas of zombies, we can live in a house trailer in the bed.<img height="220" src="http://www.lord.com/Portals/4/caterpillar_797_dump_truck.jpg" width="275" border="0" />OK, change in plans, we make a run for the iron range in northern Minnesota to get some big trucks.

Sheeplovr

07-10-2006, 12:49 PM

I say we get giant coal trucks and convert them to solar,to power a ba ttery to power that truck we would need like a foot ball field sized solar panale 
we gotta be serious here this is a real threat not some goofynessthis theard may save your life and loved ones when the day comes and it will come

Marc with a c

07-10-2006, 12:49 PM

i would just put on my dancing shoes.   <img height="128" src="http://images.picsearch.com/is?MhPRaAt1UHkj5r3QLNmrygU7ISJSJslSUrqSnYqsHaw" width="128" border="0" />if you cant beat 'em...

MobCounty

07-10-2006, 12:58 PM

Sheeplovr wrote:  I say we get giant coal trucks and convert them to solar,  to power a ba ttery to power that truck we would need like a foot ball field sized solar panale we gotta be serious here this is a real threat not some goofynessthis theard may save your life and loved ones when the day comes and it will come Okay, add a windmill or two to suppliment the solar panel. My plan is a long term survival plan, not just any old fly by night, save myself for a week or two type of plan.

ChimneyFish

07-10-2006, 02:34 PM

I'm taking the ol' shotgun, with as many shells as I can carry, and a machete. And my ipod with these on shuffle;<img src="http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c217/luxa1/EarthADalbumcover.jpg" border="0" /><img src="http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c217/luxa1/dm138_sdwau.jpg" border="0" /><img src="http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c217/luxa1/126246.jpg" border="0" /><img src="http://i28.photobucket.com/albums/c217/luxa1/37370.gif" border="0" />When it comes to a soundtrack for zombie bashing, you're just not getting any better than this.

TheMojoPin

07-10-2006, 02:36 PM

I'd pull a Cobain after about a week or so.  Zombie killin' all the goddamn time ain't no way to live.

kdubya

07-10-2006, 03:05 PM

MobCounty wrote: Sheeplovr wrote:  I say we get giant coal trucks and convert them to solar,  to power a ba ttery to power that truck we would need like a foot ball field sized solar panale we gotta be serious here this is a real threat not some goofynessthis theard may save your life and loved ones when the day comes and it will come Okay, add a windmill or two to suppliment the solar panel. My plan is a long term survival plan, not just any old fly by night, save myself for a week or two type of plan.Nope, steam engine. What about fuel you ask?Once we shoot them in the head we burn the fuckers. If we ever run out of fuel that emans all the zombies are dead so we can stop running.

chili

07-10-2006, 03:14 PM

XMRonFez, you bring up some good points, but I still say Wal-Mart or a similar location is a safer long term bet than staying at hom with the lights out. You'd run out of supplies before the zombies ate everyone else and started rummaging house to house. The point of being in Wal-Mart is not to avoid the zombies, but to embrace the fact that they are comin after you and you must set up a location with enough supplies to last several years if need be until lil baby Jesus comes to save us all and shoots the zombies with his Jesus powers.I wonder if you covered yourself in mud like Arnie in Predator if the zombies would notice you.Also, the Shawn of the Dead technique was good, just amble around like the zombies to and maybe slip through.

sr71blackbird

07-10-2006, 03:16 PM

How long do you figure the whole zombie attack will go on for?  Weeks?  Months?  After say 90% of the world is dead, will they starve? Will they start eating animals after that?

chili

07-10-2006, 03:20 PM

It's tough to pinpoint an exact length of time a zombie attack would last. I would have to know the shelf life of a zombie without food. You have to consider that as the zombie hordes devour more people and turn them into zombies the number of zombies grows exponentially while the amount of food plummets. Keep this up and you have large numbers of zombies dying off. This, I theorize, would also create a strain of SUPERZOMBIES who know that the odds are against them and become unceasing murderers.

Death Metal Moe

07-10-2006, 03:22 PM

<img height="224" src="http://images.amazon.com/images/P/B00000607B.01._SCMZZZZZZZ_.jpg" width="235" border="0" />The soundtrack to the end of days.

kdubya

07-10-2006, 03:25 PM

chili wrote: It's tough to pinpoint an exact length of time a zombie attack would last. I would have to know the shelf life of a zombie without food. You have to consider that as the zombie hordes devour more people and turn them into zombies the number of zombies grows exponentially while the amount of food plummets. Keep this up and you have large numbers of zombies dying off. This, I theorize, would also create a strain of SUPERZOMBIES who know that the odds are against them and become unceasing murderers. Also remember a zombie is dead and starts to decay, as this happens it gets slower and eventualy falls apart. I would say after a few months we would be able to slow down our running.

sr71blackbird

07-10-2006, 03:27 PM

So you think if you can hide and protect yourself for a long enough period of time that youll be ok?  Say you drove does to Florida and stole a boat and went to a remore island with fishing gear and matches and tents and shit.. Stole tons of rice and fuel and pots and pans and fishing tackle, you might be able to hold up for months!  Thats what Id do!

FreshJ

07-10-2006, 04:35 PM

Good point are brought up, but I would 1st head to a major sports store of K-mart, everyone else is going to wal-mart, k-mart will have more suppplies.  I would then find a bus and pick up lots of people, from there we will be able to move on wheels, hopefully finding a power plant, where we could lure the zombies in and burn them for electricity.  That way they can not rise again and we will have lots of power and such to kill more zombies. It might be cool to get a working rail gun working off of the burning zombies that are creating electricity.

chili

07-10-2006, 04:39 PM

Good point. Maybe we should start marketing a new line of Zombie Shelters for the new paranoia.

XMRonFez

07-10-2006, 04:51 PM

I think the length of the zombie invasion may be determined on exactly how the virus is spread...Is it only the bodies of the recently deceased that are returning to life? Can someone only become a zombie by being bitten by one? Or is it some other form of disease? Like some popped open military canister, rage infected monkey, or alien virus? If you can only become a zombie by being attacked by one, I think the invasion will only last a day. We'll be able to round them up and adapt to the situation. If any one who dies, just gets up and becomes a zombie. No matter how they died. We're all fucked...

DarkHippie

07-10-2006, 06:07 PM

A House boat is the key.  Zombies can't drown, but they cant swim either.  i would live in a house boat and raid ports for food and weapons.  eventually we can form a WaterWorld free of the zombie menace

MobCounty

07-10-2006, 06:20 PM

Lets go one further and get a cruise ship!

chili

07-10-2006, 06:35 PM

A cruise ship is key. With guard dolphins. You know, just in case any of the Cuban zombies utilize their raft-building skills.

mikeyboy

07-10-2006, 06:45 PM

Zombies are so misunderstood.  They just want to be friends.  Sure they sometimes tear your flesh from your body with their teeth, but they mean it affectionately.

Death Metal Moe

07-10-2006, 06:46 PM

mikeyboy wrote: Zombies are so misunderstood.  They just want to be friends.  Sure they sometimes tear your flesh from your body with their teeth, but they mean it affectionately. Kinda like psycho Ex's.

kdubya

07-11-2006, 05:44 AM

Hottub

07-11-2006, 06:04 AM

You gotta go after these mother fuckers with everything you got, right off the bat.By eliminating the first wave of zombies, you dramatically cut down the number of 2nd generation zombies. (ie zombies biting humans and turning them into zombies.)I figure there are only so many unburied dead laying around at any given moment and it should be fairly simple to knock them out. Wait outside the mortuary or morgue with your sand wedge and have a blast.Also don't be fooled by the stories of the graveyards coming to life. Do you really think a zombie is going to be able to break through a metal box and then dig out from 6 feet of dirt?   Bullshit! You have to focus.

kdubya

07-11-2006, 11:04 AM

Hottub is right. I say we take it a step further and start capping people we think may become zombies, just to be safe.

Sheeplovr

07-11-2006, 12:01 PM

How long do you figure the whole zombie attack will go on for?  Weeks? 
Months?  After say 90% of the world is dead, will they starve? Will
they start eating animals after that?listen
zombie attack isnt the problem its the zombie disease it will be in the
air everyone who dies will get it even without a bite everyone would
need ot cut off there grandparnts and pets heads when they pass or else
they will eat you alivethis is a never ending treat the inniasl attack possible 6 months till everyone gets there shit tgeher and figures it outafter
that it will be like ebola and outbreaks will happen mostly i think 1
billion people will be zombies theres 6 billion in the world i give a 1
and 6 of every people will e zombiefied

Furtherman

10-29-2008, 08:29 AM

http://cache.gawker.com/assets/images/io9/2008/10/zombies.jpg

War and Social Upheaval Cause Spikes in Zombie Movie Production (http://io9.com/5070243/war-and-social-upheaval-cause-spikes-in-zombie-movie-production)

There's been a huge spike in the production of zombie movies lately, and many of them seem to be inspired by war. Everything from 28 Days Later to Zombie Strippers make explicit reference to wartime, as did seminal 1968 zombie flick Night of the Living Dead. Is there really a connection between zombie movies and social unrest? We decided to do some research and find out. The result? We've got a line graph showing the number of zombie movies coming out in the West each year since 1910 — and there are definite spikes during certain years, which always seem to happen eerily close to historical events involving war or social upheaval.

Patient zer0

10-29-2008, 08:50 AM

I would bite them and turn them back into humans

failing that. a nice aluminum bat and a sling shot with marbles

patsopinion

10-29-2008, 10:20 AM

unfortunatley i dont have 5k to spend on guns
but if i did
this is what i would have
http://www.budsgunshop.com/catalog/images/41869.jpg
http://www.budsgunshop.com/catalog/images/51903.jpg
http://www.budsgunshop.com/catalog/images/11510.jpg

Patient zer0

10-29-2008, 10:28 AM

what is that middle gun? looks like a glock hybrid thingamajiggy

furie

10-29-2008, 10:46 AM

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y178/furie1335/pics/16_podborka_75.jpg

I'm not a shotgun guy, so i would grab a .40 H&K and a bat for when i run out of ammo.

this ofcourse all depends on when then zombie attack comes, if i'm at home i would be better prepared, but probably asleep when the attack comes and ofcouse vunderable.

if this happens when i'm at work, i don't have equipment or weapons, but i'd be awake and beable to run and hide

patsopinion

10-29-2008, 10:58 AM

what is that middle gun? looks like a glock hybrid thingamajiggy

its a 9mm with a 100+1
its a semi auto though so im re evaluating

patsopinion

10-29-2008, 10:59 AM

what type of 12 ga ammo should i get for zombies?

im thinking slugs would be best
any recommendations?

Patient zer0

10-29-2008, 11:07 AM

fuck that. get some buck shot and blow their faces to smitheriens

marky2bucks

10-29-2008, 04:40 PM

thanks to patsopinion for reviving this thread. I have been thinking a lot about it lately. It is an election year.

I don't want a gun in my house unless there are zombies, so I think I will do my best with garden tools until my neighbors are overrun. Then I will take their guns and supplies.

As far as garden tools go, I will fend them off with a shovel, and finish them with a hatchet or a claw hammer. One on one, I think I'm ok. But that's tricky with a mob. I'll need to bottleneck them, probably my porch, or maybe the stairs.

The Ogre

10-30-2008, 01:48 PM

I'd take the AR-15 if I had to choose. Although honestly I'd rather stay at home. Maybe it's from watching every goddamn zombie movie made too many times in my youth, but I've always kept this as a jokey thing in the back of my mind. Or what I should say is that I think of it as a silly joke in order to justify the 50 gallons of water and few hundred cans of food I have in my basement. The piles of ammo boxes wouldn't hurt either.

Since I lent out World War Z and the Zombie Survival Guide to everyone I know, their plan is to swing on by my house in case the shit goes down.

Also, read The Walking Dead. Pretty fucking cool zombie comic, even if it does have the most sporadic release schedule of all time.

furie

11-01-2008, 08:58 AM

fuck that. get some buck shot and blow their faces to smitheriens

i'd go for the slugs. you want to be sure to get to that brain.
12 might be over doing it though when talking slugs and head shots...

WampusCrandle

11-01-2008, 10:13 AM

hello zombie lovers! as i was reading this last night, watching Zombie movies, feeling sick, my friend asked me this question, which i shall pass onto you all.

You are stuck in your one floor cabin, and directly outside are an endless supply of zombies (normal, slow moving). there is no escape, and there is no real chance of living through the night. you decide "fuck it, i'm going out there and taking as many as them as i can!" so, here is the question: What one weapon would you take with you, what are the last words you would say as you go out blazing, and what is the last song you listen to?

mine:
weapon: hammer and sickle
last words: I'm gonna rock out with my cock out!
last song: "Twistin' the Night Away" by Sam Cooke

disneyspy

11-01-2008, 01:25 PM

patsopinion

11-01-2008, 05:31 PM

http://rat-hunter.com/stories/2006/grenade-launcher/grenade-launcher.jpg
because im not dying without taking like 1000 of the fuckerz with me

marky2bucks

11-01-2008, 07:00 PM

Weapon:<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/YAZ2qvhJGgU&hl=en&fs=1"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/YAZ2qvhJGgU&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

Song: Another one bites the dust

Words: Ron and Fez Noon to 3. Bitches

WampusCrandle

11-01-2008, 10:48 PM

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MOD MOD MOD - please take care of this silly ninny!

furie

11-03-2008, 05:16 PM

http://www.bumlee.com/deanimator.html

I've posted this before, but it just its this thread

ChimneyFish

11-03-2008, 07:30 PM

http://www.bumlee.com/deanimator.html

I've posted this before, but it just its this thread

Pretty cool.

Weapon: Hydrogen Bomb

Last Words: "Awwww, fuuuuck."

Song: "See How Pretty, See how Smart" by (The) Melvins

Captain Rooster

11-03-2008, 07:38 PM

My bare fuckin' hands. I know Judo ... I've seen Austin Powers ... "Judo Chop!" ...gets 'em every time.

patsopinion

11-03-2008, 08:02 PM

grenade launcher
its a tough league to get a hit in
born as ghosts rage against the machiene

The Ogre

11-09-2008, 02:00 PM

weapon - aluminum bat. If I know I'm gonna be dead regardless why bother with the guns?

words - "I'm hurtin' for certain."

song - "Vocal Test" by Integrity

jauble

11-09-2008, 02:41 PM

Weapon: Riot shield and climbing axe

Quote: "Noon to three"

Song: Banana Phone

Mullenax

11-10-2008, 03:53 PM

Weapon: Riot shield and climbing axe

Quote: "Noon to three"

Song: Banana Phone

Ooh ... I like this format.
Weapon: Bat with metal spikes and scuba suit.

Quote: "See Ya!"

Song: Genius of Love

rick9669

11-10-2008, 04:00 PM

give me a peterbuilt .......flaten those fuckers:devil2:

patsopinion

11-10-2008, 04:16 PM

give me a peterbuilt .......flaten those fuckers:devil2:

wow
ur a redneck

furie

11-21-2008, 08:38 PM

MisterSmith

11-22-2008, 09:35 AM

This is great for humans and all, but not so great for zombie defense (http://www.guba.com/watch/3000010216?category_id=527&duration_step=0&filter_tiny=0&pp=40&sb=5&set=-1&sf=0&size_step=0&o=19&sample=1205661128:721434e81142f8cb0f3afc45cd9c967c d5a83be2)

If you had a herd coming at you that might be just what you need. When you are shooting into a crowd of oncoming zombies and accuracy isn't quite as important, that little baby might be just the ticket - if you have enough ammo and a solid backup weapon, of course.

furie

04-07-2009, 04:43 PM

Stranger takes bite of gardener's arm
Victim says attacker chewed, swallowed
Tuesday, April 07, 2009
By Michelle Hunter
East Jefferson bureau

A Metairie resident is recovering after a stranger bit a chunk of flesh out of his arm, and swallowed it, Saturday afternoon.

Joseph Lancellotti, 67, told authorities he did not know the suspect, later identified as Mario Vargas, 48, or why he was attacked in his front yard.

Lancellotti was gardening at his home in the 4400 block of Kawanee Avenue about 2 p.m. when he noticed a man walking toward his house, shouting angrily, the report said. Lancellotti said he couldn't understand the man because he was yelling in Spanish. But when the man got within two feet, he slugged Lancellotti in the head, the report said.

Lancellotti said he tried to defend himself with a garden rake. As the men struggled over the rake, the stranger bent over and bit Lancellotti on his right forearm, the report said. Lancellotti's flesh ripped away as he fell to the ground. The man then got on top of Lancellotti and began choking him, the report said.

more... (http://www.nola.com/news/?/base/news-1/1239081731120020.xml&coll=1)

TeeBone

04-07-2009, 05:27 PM

Slumbag

04-07-2009, 06:32 PM

http://www.randomhouse.com/crown/zombiesurvivalguide/index2.html

The book is both hysterical and useful.

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:pcOYGsZjElPo6M:http://i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff83/wathstud/zombie_survival_guide.jpg

I finished this a few months back. It's a good book, and really points out little things you may not think of at first. Like water supply and shit.

kdubya

04-07-2009, 06:42 PM

WampusCrandle

04-07-2009, 06:51 PM

http://www.randomhouse.com/crown/zombiesurvivalguide/index2.html

The book is both hysterical and useful.

http://tbn0.google.com/images?q=tbn:pcOYGsZjElPo6M:http://i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff83/wathstud/zombie_survival_guide.jpg

the author is damn funny. he came to Fordham recently and it was interesting to get his view of how NYC would do in different scenarios of a Zombie invasion, apocalypse. he signed my books with a creepy, grim smile. I love the guy.

Slumbag

04-07-2009, 07:07 PM

the author is damn funny. he came to Fordham recently and it was interesting to get his view of how NYC would do in different scenarios of a Zombie invasion, apocalypse. he signed my books with a creepy, grim smile. I love the guy.

I would have spent the whole night asking him about his mom and dad.

WampusCrandle

04-07-2009, 07:08 PM

I would have spent the whole night asking him about his mom and dad.

did something bad happen to them, or to see how the author is an odd end product of his parents

Slumbag

04-07-2009, 07:12 PM

did something bad happen to them, or to see how the author is an odd end product of his parents

http://photos.upi.com/story/t/fa6b5cfd9d5635c5833934c1e6a4c258/Delgo_marks_Bancrofts_last_performance.jpg

WampusCrandle

04-07-2009, 07:16 PM

http://photos.upi.com/story/t/fa6b5cfd9d5635c5833934c1e6a4c258/Delgo_marks_Bancrofts_last_performance.jpg

that's not his parents - of course, i had to look it up.

Slumbag

04-07-2009, 07:18 PM

that's not his parents - of course, i had to look it up.

According to Wikipedia they are
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Max_Brooks

And the interviews I read where he was talking about his father being an influence to him.

Not just that, look at him
http://www.moviejuice.com/images/brooks.jpg
He looks just like Mel Brooks

CofyCrakCocaine

04-07-2009, 07:18 PM

I finished this a few months back. It's a good book, and really points out little things you may not think of at first. Like water supply and shit.

Or the hazards of mullets.

WampusCrandle

04-07-2009, 07:22 PM

According to Wikipedia they are
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Max_Brooks

And the interviews I read where he was talking about his father being an influence to him.

Not just that, look at him
http://www.moviejuice.com/images/brooks.jpg
He looks just like Mel Brooks

i've been pwned...i only looked at the first marriage.

CofyCrakCocaine

04-07-2009, 07:28 PM

i've been pwned...i only looked at the first marriage.

I still love you Wampus. But you know the rules.

WampusCrandle

04-07-2009, 07:44 PM

I still love you Wampus. But you know the rules.

and the rules are?

kdubya

04-08-2009, 10:20 AM

So if and when the zombies rise, would you rather be in a big city or out in the country?

Thebazile78

04-08-2009, 10:24 AM

So if and when the zombies rise, would you rather be in a big city or out in the country?

Country.

Fewer surprises and no high-rise buildings that could be quickly infected overnight.

Duh.

TheMojoPin

04-08-2009, 10:33 AM

So if and when the zombies rise, would you rather be in a big city or out in the country?

Split the difference. Your best bet is to be in a Big Country:

<object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/hkr_2G3Jlko&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x402061&color2=0x9461ca"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/hkr_2G3Jlko&hl=en&fs=1&color1=0x402061&color2=0x9461ca" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object>

When the zombies come for you, you'll need to STAAAAAAY ALLLLIIIIIIIIIIIIIVVVVVVVE.