Real world super powers

[kdubya]

<p>The found money topic got me thinking. I find money all the time, to the point my friends call it my super power. So we developed a theory that everyone has &quot;real world&quot; super powers. Like I said I find money and I am very good at opening stuck jars.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>What are other folks real world super powers?</p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[suggums]

stealing lighters<br />

[blakjeezis]

<p>I have the ability to extract the exact number of pills from the bottle first time, every time, by tapping it into my palm.</p><p>My friend's brother eats like an animal. No matter what it is he gets it all over his face. When he's done, he needs only one wipe with one napkin and he's clean. Spotless, like that scene where Leslie Nielsen wipes the shit of himself in The Naked Gun.<br /></p>

[Don Stugots]

after i go food shopping, i can manage to carry 8-10 plastic bags in each hand, so that I only make 1 trip from the car to the house. i can also pick up dog poop with one whipe without leaving any on the floor.

[J.Clints]

I seem to find everything my wife looses

[nevnut]

<strong>jclintsma</strong> wrote:<br />I seem to find everything my wife looses <p>I'm the same way with my wife, except for the $250 in rent money we think she dropped in the post office 2 years ago.</p>

[FezPaul]

<p>http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/photo57.jpg<br /></p><p><font size="2">&quot;I can make spagetti.&quot;</font></p>

[EliSnow]

<font face="arial,helvetica,sans-serif" size="3">Finding a woman's g-spot.</font>

[reeshy]

<strong>nevnut</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>jclintsma</strong> wrote:<br />I seem to find everything my wife looses <p>I'm the same way with my wife, except for the $250 in rent money we think she dropped in the post office 2 years ago.</p><p>250 in rent money?????????...Where do you live???????..........Bosnia????????</p>

[J.Clints]

<strong>nevnut</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>jclintsma</strong> wrote:<br />I seem to find everything my wife looses <p>I'm the same way with my wife, except for the $250 in rent money we think she dropped in the post office 2 years ago.</p><p>Thats when you need KDUBYA's powers.</p>

[J.Clints]

<strong>EliSnow</strong> wrote:<br /><font face="arial,helvetica,sans-serif" size="3">Finding a woman's g-spot.</font> <p>Thats what i am talking about that she thought she lost.</p>

[FezPaul]

<p>http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/gc.jpg<br /></p><p><font size="2">I'm very good at backing into a parking space, I wish there was some way I could teach it to you, but it's a natural gift.</font></p>

[J.Clints]

<strong>FezPaul</strong> wrote:<br /><p><img src="http://i49.photobucket.com/albums/f281/FezPaul/gc.jpg" border="0" /><br /></p><p><font size="2">I'm very good at backing into a parking space, I wish there was some way I could teach it to you, but it's a natural gift.</font></p><p>Could you at least try to explain it?Please</p>

[nevnut]

<strong>reeshy</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>nevnut</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>jclintsma</strong> wrote:<br />I seem to find everything my wife looses <p>I'm the same way with my wife, except for the $250 in rent money we think she dropped in the post office 2 years ago.</p><p>250 in rent money?????????...Where do you live???????..........Bosnia????????</p><p>Trailer space rent, I'm a home owner now thank God.</p>

[curtoid]

<p>I have been asked directions in the native tongue in several foreign countries (France, Germany, Italy, Mexico) - I also am asked if I can take the picture of tourists, pretty much no matter where i go.</p><p>The BIG one, though, is that I can bend most of my fingers all the way back - my pinkies can be flush with the back of my hands. It freaks the out most villians. </p>

[Judge Smails]

<p>I can wake up at 6:30 am&nbsp;on the dot, without the aid of an alarm clock.&nbsp; This power turns into a curse on weekends though.</p>

[nevnut]

<strong>judge_smails</strong> wrote:<br /><p>I can wake up at 6:30 am&nbsp;on the dot, without the aid of an alarm clock.&nbsp; This power turns into a curse on weekends though.</p><p>I wake up at 4:30 am, I think I have the worse curse.</p>

[mdr55]

<img width="215" height="214" border="0" src="http://www.ecrannoir.fr/films/99/photoz/mystery/mystery.jpg" />

[kdubya]

<strong>nevnut</strong> wrote:<br /><strong>jclintsma</strong> wrote:<br />I seem to find everything my wife looses <p>I'm the same way with my wife, except for the $250 in rent money we think she dropped in the post office 2 years ago.</p><p>Thats when you need KDUBYA's powers.</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>As they say &quot;With great powers come great responsability&quot; I will keep my eyes out for $250. If I come across it I will let ya know</p>

[Gvac]

<p>Of course I'm an excellent driver.</p><p><img border="0" src="http://www.channel4.com/film/media/film/4x/R/rain_man_xl_01.jpg" /></p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>I also seem to have an internal compass; it's virtually impossible for me to get lost.&nbsp;&nbsp; Even in foreign countries I can find where I'm going relatively easily, with or without a map.&nbsp; </p><p>I'm a regular Magellan, I tell ya!&nbsp;</p>

[ADF]

<p>&nbsp;</p><strong>blakjeezis</strong> wrote:<br /><p>I have the ability to extract the exact number of pills from the bottle first time, every time, by tapping it into my palm.</p><p><br /></p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;Hmm.. that sounds vaguely familiar.</p><p></p><p>
Top 10 Least Exciting Superpowers - August 3, 1990<br />
<br />
10. Super spelling<br />
9. Lightning-fast mood swings<br />
8. Really bendy thumb<br />
7. Can breathe soup<br />
6. Ability to calm jittery squirrels<br /><strong>
5. Power to shake exactly two aspirin out of a bottle</strong><br />
4. Ability to get tickets to Goodwill Games<br />
3. Power to score with other superheroes' wives<br />
2. Ability to communicate with corn<br />
1. Magnetic colon </p><p>&nbsp;</p>

[Marc with a c]

<p><img src="http://www.shtick.org/RealWorld/puck.jpg" border="0" /><img src="http://www.hurherald.com/articles/12935/syrus_y.jpg" border="0" /><img src="http://www.station6online.com/Images/MTVimages/coral_smith1.jpg" border="0" /></p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>real world super powers</p>

[blakjeezis]

<p><span class="postbody">Hmm.. that sounds vaguely familiar.</span></p><p>Never heard of parallel pill taking?&nbsp;</p>

[Coach]

I pee standing up and can look at my dick while doing it!!!!!!!!!

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by Coach on 4-16-06 @ 2:41 AM</span>

[PapaBear]

<p>1. I have an uncanny ability to communicate with deaf people (though I know no sign language).</p><p>2. I can get from one side of town to the other, (without violating traffic laws) faster than someone who speeds and runs red lights or stop signs.</p><p>3. I can remember the most minute details of a situations, for decades,&nbsp;as long as the details aren't the ones I really need to remember.</p><p>4. I can wear a G.I. Joe boot (original full sized kind) on my thumb... forward or backward.</p><p><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X5bBLXFLkXM" target="_self">5. I can get an egg from one shot glass to another, without the shot glasses leaving the table... without them being tilted more than 45 degrees... and without touching the egg with anything. It's truly a wonder to behold.</a></p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by PapaBear on 4-16-06 @ 5:55 AM</span>

[suggums]

black people love me<br />

[Gvac]

<p>Screw flying or being bullet-proof.</p><p>Suggums has the most useful super power <em>ever.</em> <br /></p>

[kdubya]

<p>&quot;4. I can wear a G.I. Joe boot (original full sized kind) on my thumb... forward or backward.&quot;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>That is amazing</p>

[FezPaul]

I can clear out an entire room with a single fart.

[Don Stugots]

my chick has brought to my attention that I have other super powers that I failed to mention.

I can make a pitcher of sangria that will level a football team and they will never know how drunk they are due to how sweeeeeeeet it is.

I can leave my sunglasses on my forehead and make them fall down on to my eyes just by doing the people eyebrow

I can do this thing with my tounge where I sort of twist it and then she kind of losses all rational thought.

[PapaBear]

<p>I can't believe I forgot this one. I once threw a dart... hit the bull's eye... the dart bounced back at me... I kicked the dart up &quot;hacky sack style&quot;... caught the dart... threw the dart... and stuck it in the bull's eye.</p><p>Two bull's eyes with one dart!</p>

[kdubya]

My powers have once again come though, just found 5 bucks.

[shamus mcfitzy]

<p>similar to one before but unless i am sick (some sort of exposure to a kryptonite-like substance?) i can fall asleep on a train and wake up right when i stop at the stop before i need to get off. Tried it on the L, J, F, A, G, and I believe the 3.</p><p>I know this is at least unique to the props needed, but in high school (maybe 3 years ago I was exposed to that type of krytonite that takes away your powers forever?) i could bounce the little metal piece that comes off the top of a soda can into the soda can from within 5 paces away. I honestly did it everytime i tried for 3 years. True story.</p>

[Furtherman]

I can make certain streetlights turn off&nbsp;everytime I walk near them.

[Hottub]

<p>Given proper oral stimulation, I have the ability to ejaculate!&nbsp;</p><p>In 2 minutes!</p><p>Every Time!!</p>

[ChildofFez]

I've lost my wallet&nbsp;thousands times in over 18 years and find it every time no matter where it is no matter where i left it.

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by ChildofFez on 4-27-06 @ 11:01 AM</span>

[A.J.]

I&nbsp;can turn a gray sky blue.<br />I can make it rain, whenever I want it to.<br />I&nbsp;can build a castle from a single grain of sand.<br />I can make a ship sail, uh, on dry land.<br /><br />But I can't get next to you.<br />

[Marc with a c]

i can beat up chuck norris

[ChimneyFish]

<strong><em><font face="georgia,times new roman,times,serif" size="2">I can smoke four packs of cigarettes and drink 40 beers in two 7 hour sittings.</font></em></strong>