Nosey Neighbors

[AngelAmy]

I'm looking for people who have stories about nosey neighbors.  My dad lives next to the two nosiest old people in the world.  They ALWAYS have their sliding glass door uncurtained (if that's even a word) so they can look out to be in everyone's business.  Whenever we come over they always have to stare as we walk by. The other day took the icing off the cake though.  I was going to my father's place to pick up my camera and I knocked on the door and the old bag poked her stupid head out the door.  As Norton would say, I wanted to spt in her face.  It made me so mad that she is so into anyone else's business that she would look outside cause someone is visiting someone else.  Next time I see her I will be cursing her off so if it's your grandmother tell her to go fuck herself and I am not sorry.

[A.J.]

I get more pissed off by <em>noisy </em>neighbors.

[Sheeplovr]

<p>you think thats bad my neighbor is C.D. Bales</p><p><img width="470" height="312" border="0" src="http://www.cinekolossal.com/star/m_n_o/martin/martin4.jpg" />&nbsp;</p>

[Judge Smails]

<p>I've got nosey neighbors on either side of me, but they're a little more stealthy in their spying.&nbsp; We've never caught them looking out the window at us, but they will always make comments like: &quot;So, I saw that your car wasn't in the driveway all day yesterday. Where were you?&quot; or &quot;There were a lot of cars parked in front of your house yesterday.&nbsp; Were you having a party or something?&quot; I would never think, or care, to keep tabs on them; and if I did, I would never ask them for what is obviously personal information.</p><p>My wife and I just laugh it off.&nbsp; The way we figure it, it reduces the chances that we'll ever be robbed when we're not home because they're keeping such a close watch on our house.&nbsp; They, of course, could be robbed blind and I'd never notice a thing.</p>

[torker]

<p><strong><font size="1">Nosey Neighbors</font></strong> </p><p>That reminds me, Happy Passover!</p><p><img height="536" src="http://www.arlington-mass.com/foodmaster.jpg" width="303" border="0" /></p>

[Don Stugots]

<strong>torker</strong> wrote:<br /><p>&nbsp;</p><strong><font size="1">Nosey Neighbors</font></strong> <p>&nbsp;</p><p>That reminds me, Happy Passover!</p><p><img height="536" src="http://www.arlington-mass.com/foodmaster.jpg" width="303" border="0" /></p><p>My computer monitor in now covered in pea soup with rice.&nbsp; Thank you very much.&nbsp; </p>

[JustJon]

I say start doing disturbing things to really make them talk.&nbsp; Walk up to the house wearing ski masks and carrying weapons.<br />

[marcymark]

a year ago i had the same problem with this old lady next door , whenever i cut the grass she was like not to bother you but .. so one day i just blew her off LOUD now she just's waves.

[suggums]

amy, you should stand at the edge of her property and have a stare off (assuming the cursing doesn't work)<br />

[MasterSoySauce]

<p>i had some neighbors get into a fight it went like this</p><p>female voice: you have a tiny dick</p><p>male voice: you get so fucking drunk and wanna fuck you prolly cant feel anything</p><p>female voice: you're a fat ass with no dick</p><p>male: yea, i'm a fat fucking whale with a tiny cock.</p><p>after that it was all inaudible, they argue constantly. </p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by MasterSoySauce on 4-12-06 @ 2:46 PM</span>

[Earlshog]

M.S.S. you don't live&nbsp;on Congress Street in&nbsp;Jersey City by any chance??? (uncomfortable laugh)

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by Earlshog on 4-12-06 @ 4:49 PM</span>

[PapaBear]

Maybe they never had&nbsp;kids and are longing for a visit themselves.

[mdr55]

<p>Maybe they're part of the neighborhood watch</p><p><img width="147" height="199" border="0" src="http://www.ci.san-ramon.ca.us/police/images/watchsign.jpg" />&nbsp;</p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>or Big Brother&nbsp;</p>

[SatCam]

Maybe they're just old bags and have nothing else better to do.

[Death Metal Moe]

<p>Invite me over. </p><p>That'll piss them off.</p>

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

<p>Invite me over. </p><p>That'll piss them off.</p><p>Remember that time I told you not to engage with my neighbor? He's the definition of the word DOUCHEBAG.</p><p>He moved in with his wife a few years ago and made himself czar of the condo. He has a problem with me for some reason and has bothered my guests on occasion. The other day he pulled a dick move. One of my other neighbors parks his motorcycle in front of the building on the sidewalk. He asked around to see whether people were bothered by it. Douchebag was, of course, bothered so the guy said he'd make room in his rented garage and move it as soon as he could. Before the guy could move it, douchebag called the cops and had the guy ticketed. </p><p>I really really wish he'd move.</p>

[OGC]

<font size="2">Start walking around the yard naked. Invite your fat relatives over to do the same. That'll give your nosey neighbors something to look at, or maybe cure them of peeking out their windows all together.</font>

[Death Metal Moe]

<strong>Alice S. Fuzzybutt</strong> wrote:<br /><p>Invite me over. </p><p>That'll piss them off. </p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Remember that time I told you not to engage with my neighbor? He's the definition of the word DOUCHEBAG.</p><p>I do remember that asshat.&nbsp; I never did get to meet him, too bad.&nbsp; It would have been a short yet productive discussion.</p>

[Reephdweller]

<p>Remember that time I told you not to engage with my neighbor? He's the definition of the word DOUCHEBAG.</p><p>He moved in with his wife a few years ago and made himself czar of the condo. He has a problem with me for some reason and has bothered my guests on occasion. The other day he pulled a dick move. One of my other neighbors parks his motorcycle in front of the building on the sidewalk. He asked around to see whether people were bothered by it. Douchebag was, of course, bothered so the guy said he'd make room in his rented garage and move it as soon as he could. Before the guy could move it, douchebag called the cops and had the guy ticketed. </p><p>You should find ways to torture him back...order 12 dozen pizzas to his place, or sign him up for 1000 mailing lists, grab every subscription card for any magazine you can find and sign him up for every one of them. I have a friend at work who did that and she made this guys life absolutely miserable. He had thousands of subscriptions to cancel and reconcile. I giggled.</p><p>Order a case of chocolate pudding, then take some of it and put it in a bag in front of his place and light it on fire. Take dog poop from around the neighborhood and fill the pudding box with it and put it outside his door as well. He'll stomp out the bag and think it was poop, but the real fun surprise will come when he opens the box. Hilarity will ensue (as Fark would say).</p>

[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

Order a case of chocolate pudding, <p>&nbsp;</p><p>It's all about the puddin!</p><p>Nah, I couldn't do any of that! It's too small a building. Although it has crossed my mind to key his car. I know enough NOT to do it! But it makes me feel better when I imagine myself keying his precious Audi. </p><p>Did I mention he stops for a minute to listen to what I'm doing? My second front door is in the living room (I have a railway apt). I can hear him come down the stairs because he likes to run and hits the stairs hard. My front door is at the landing from the 4th floor. I've heard him come down and stop for a full minute and then he goes along his way. I didn't really notice at first but I started to after the 5th, 10th, and 15th time.</p><p>UGH! </p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by Alice S. Fuzzybutt on 4-13-06 @ 11:01 PM</span>

[FUNKMAN]

the lady next door is pretty damn nosey. that's why when i'm out in the yard i'll scratch my balls alot and shoot snot rockets out one nostril...

[A.J.]

<strong>Reefdweller</strong> wrote:<br /><blockquote /><p>&nbsp;</p><p>You should find ways to torture him back...order 12 dozen pizzas to his place, or sign him up for 1000 mailing lists, grab every subscription card for any magazine you can find and sign him up for every one of them. I </p><p>&nbsp;</p><p>Or send some Mormons or Scientologists over to preach to him.</p>

[pennington]

<p>I have 4 houses around me with the same type of people in them. They're bored, lonely and have absolutely NOTHING to do.</p><p>I stop over and visit them on occasion.&nbsp;&nbsp;I eat cookies or drink a beer and talk to them for a while.&nbsp; They've been married to each other for 50 or 60 years and have totally run out of things to say to each other. Or one of their spouses died and they're like lost souls.</p><p>I suggest you just be nice&nbsp;and talk to them for a few minutes.&nbsp; You'll probably be the same way when you're 80.</p>

[ShelleBink]

<p>At home, my neighbors can be noisy... especially playing basketball at 3 am ((damn white boys)).</p><p> Here at school, I hear the cackling of the cunts... God I can't wait til this semester is over.</p><p>As for NOSEY... everyone keeps to themselves... which I guess is good in retrospect.&nbsp;</p>

<span class=post_edited>This message was edited by ShelleBink on 4-17-06 @ 3:43 PM</span>