50 worst acting performances of all time [Archive]

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Iamnotatool

04-03-2005, 01:00 PM

During the film awards season, we are always subjected to an endless stream of superlatives directed at actors, films and filmmakers. Everyone you hear about is "extraordinary," "amazing," "incredible," or a "genius." Actors "transcend." Directors are "visionary." Writers are "timeless." Each year those words mean less as they are attributed to this year's crop of less than great work. That's not to say that there aren't great films being made, but there certainly are not enough to fill all the hundreds of nominations for the dozens of award shows. As an antidote to that, we here at the ronfez.net have compiled the opposite group. The worst of the worst: The 50 Worst Acting Performances in a Film. You'll find this list full of athletes, musicians and even "professional" actors who have disgraced themselves, acting and the whole film industry with some of the most unforgettably bad, uncomfortable or incomprehensible attempts at acting ever committed to celluloid. Enjoy. 50. Tom Cruise in Cocktail While Tom Cruise perfected his ultra-hammy "acting" style during the early 80's in movies like All the Right Moves and Top Gun, it wasn't until 1988 that everything came together for him in this turd of a film. As an added antibonus, this film also inflicted the pop-sensation "Kokomo" on the world as well. 49. Jake Llyod in Star Wars: The Phantom Menace Never known for his ability to direct actors, George Lucus' nearly two-decade hiatus from the director's chair did nothing to improve his skill in that department. The kid is stilted and wooden throughout, and does nothing but deflate the memory of the great character that he is supposed to become. 48. George Clooney in Red Surf A perennially mediocre star, Clooney made the leap from being TV's Booker Brooks on Roseanne to the silver screen in this shit pile about two drug dealing surfers. Another terrible performance in this film worth noting is submitted by rocker Gene Simmons as Doc. 47. Ben Affleck in Daredevil A favorite to "win" this list, Affleck makes his first appearance here at #47 with Daredevil. A remarkably bad movie, this "superhero" flick seems even worse every moment Affleck is on the screen. At times Affleck, who plays a blind crime fighter/lawyer, literally made me wish I was actually blind... or dead. 46. The Cast of Charlie's Angels: Full Throttle Oh god, what to say about this two hour music video. The acting in this movie is so god-awful I have to believe that it was done on purpose. There is no way that this group of Hollywood A-List actors could collectively display an absolute void of ability for two solid hours. The director, a grown-man who goes by the frat boy moniker"McG", did accomplish one impressive feat with this film. The worst way to spend 100 million dollars. 45. Richard Pryor in Moving I love Richard Pryor, and it pains me to put him on this list. But he is a terrible actor- sorry Richard. He is bad even when he is funny, but in this movie he is almost never funny. 44. French Stewart in McHale's Navy French Stewart is an abomination. This movie is full of terrible actors, but one shines above all others. When you are the worst actor in a movie starring, Tom Arnold, David Allen Grier and Tim Curry you are fucking bad! 43. Meg Ryan in Against the Ropes Meg Ryan is the epitome of Hollywood's obsession with cute blonde bimbo "actresses." There is NO reason why Meg Ryan should still be getting roles. She has never been good. Not once! 42. Christopher Reeve in A Step Toward Tomorrow This film about a mother, Judith Light, with a child in a wheelchair, Kendall Cunningham- who is much more convincing as an invalid than Reeve, is pretty awful all around. It is also Reeve's first film role after the accident and he is as stiff as can be. I mean, it sucks that the guy was in an accident, but when furniture is acting circles around you, it is time to hang it up- or in his, case have someone hang it up for you. 41. Jean Claude Van Damme in Universal Soldier: The Retu

furie

04-03-2005, 01:14 PM

so where's you lift that from?

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Iamnotatool

04-03-2005, 01:14 PM

Dunno, my bro sent it to me, does it matter? 

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furie

04-03-2005, 01:18 PM

no, just curious

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<a href="http://fallingtowardsapotheosis.blogspot.com/">mental vomit</a>

badorties

04-03-2005, 01:20 PM

keanu reeves in 'a midnight summer's dream' ... 
worst ever
 

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FUNKMAN

04-03-2005, 01:23 PM

one guy that comes to mind is Chuck Norris...  it's all bad stuff

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WindowSill

04-03-2005, 01:31 PM

I nominate Keanu Reeves for everything hes ever done. Especially that movie Hardball, ugh!

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torker

04-03-2005, 01:35 PM

Viggo Mortensen in Carlito's Way....
http://www.geocities.com/nzmermaid2003/Carlitos2.jpg
Not a big role, just fucking awful. 

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Tazz

04-03-2005, 01:46 PM

nd the winner is... Denise Richards! In this, the second installment of the Pierce Brosnon era,

Actually, that was the third. But she did suck.

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Snoogans

04-03-2005, 01:47 PM

im sure ben stiller has been in 50 movies, this list should be all him

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shamus mcfitzy

04-04-2005, 03:36 AM

"17. Ben Affleck in Sum of All Fears Ben Affleck, Kevin Costner and Robin Williams in a movie together, now that would be the Sum of All Fears. But Affleck’s performance in this installment of the Jack Ryan series is timelessly bad. After seeing Harrison Ford play Ryan in three of the previous four films, watching Affleck stumble through the part like a lost autistic monkey is doubly painful." haha i liked this movieand am I the only one that thinks the Chris Rock in "Dogma" and Tarrantino in "Pulp Fiction" things are way too harsh. I mean they aren't that bad. And no Michael Dutikoff (spelled horribly) or Dolph Lundgren? SOMEONE hasn't seen enough bad movies.Micheal Rapaport seems like a retard in every movie he's in. I pick his role in "Zebrahead" (i think its what it was called) as the worst acting of all time.

Doctor Manhattan

04-04-2005, 05:38 AM

quote:<hr color="cococo" align="left">...After seeing Harrison Ford play Ryan in three of the previous four films...<hr color="cococo" align="left">
 
 What about Alec Baldwin in "The Hunt for Red October"? He should have his own slot, because he's been bad in a lot of stuff but is capable of not sucking.
 
 And speaking of that, It's amazing how many of those people have won or at least been nominated for Oscars and Golden Globes. Perhaps we should list the directors and editors of these films for making these people look bad.

Also, Richard Pyror, Dana Carvey and Chris Rock aren't trying to be good actors, they are trying to be funny. Eddie Murphy and Robin Williams are trying to be real dramatic actors. <a href="http://www.fox.com/24"TARGET="_blank"><img src="http://members.cox.net/nicksporsche/wwjbd.jpg" border=0 TARGET="_blank">
 "We're putting the band back together."</a> 

This message was edited by SKW on 4-4-05 @ 9:55 AM

badorties

04-04-2005, 05:55 AM

and am I the only one that thinks the Chris Rock in "Dogma" and Tarrantino in "Pulp Fiction" things are way too harsh.no ... both were way too forced, and didn't flow with the rest of the movie ... tarrantino's scene in the bedroom talking to jules, was a bit off ...and chris rock is a brilliant stand-up, but a dreadful, horrible actor ... every movie he's starred in has been pathetic ...

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A.J.

04-04-2005, 08:08 AM

quote:__________________________________________________ ______________________________Chris Rock aren't trying to be good actors, they are trying to be funny.__________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ _____________________________<img height="475" src="http://images-eu.amazon.com/images/P/B00004CYY1.02.LZZZZZZZ.jpg" width="352" border="0" />

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Doctor Manhattan

04-04-2005, 09:01 AM

He soon made fun of that role
 <img src="http://imagehost.vendio.com/preview/co/comicod/.mids/minicb4.jpg">
 I couldn't find a picture of him in an American Flag shirt smoking crack, from either CB4 or New Jack City.

And he hasn't done anything that should be taken seriously since, except Pootie Tang (The Citizen Kane of the 21st Century!) <a href="http://www.fox.com/24"TARGET="_blank"><img src="http://members.cox.net/nicksporsche/wwjbd.jpg" border=0 TARGET="_blank">
 "We're putting the band back together."</a>

This message was edited by SKW on 4-4-05 @ 1:03 PM

Iamnotatool

04-04-2005, 09:36 AM

Tarentino is a shitty actor, but doesn't hide or deny it.  As long as he is just making a cameo-type appearance, it's cool, but anything more, and he's in trouble.

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TheMojoPin

04-04-2005, 09:37 AM

quote: quote:__________________________________________________ ______________________________Chris Rock aren't trying to be good actors, they are trying to be funny.__________________________________________________ __________________________________________________ _____________________________<img height="475" src="http://images-eu.amazon.com/images/P/B00004CYY1.02.LZZZZZZZ.jpg" width="352" border="0" /> <img src="http://img40.photobucket.com/albums/v124/Canofsoup15/Sigs/AJinDC-Sig.jpg" border="0" /> A Skidmark/canofsoup15 production. Red Sox Nation  I DARE you to tell me that he wasn't the best crackhead that's EVER been on the silver screen!

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FUNKMAN

04-04-2005, 09:55 AM

quote I DARE you to tell me that he wasn't the best crackhead that's EVER been on the silver screen! quotethere were better ones in Don't Be A Menace To Society While You're Drinking Your Juice In The Hood and In The Hood... plus they would provide additional servicesYou can't put Chris Rock and the word acting in the same sentence...

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badorties

04-04-2005, 10:17 AM

Tarentino is a shitty actor, but doesn't hide or deny it.  As long as he is just making a cameo-type appearance, it's cool, but anything more, and he's in trouble.reservoir dogs - goodpulp fiction - no goodYou can't put Chris Rock and the word acting in the same sentence...sure, you can ... if you use forced, god awful, ham, and/or bad

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JustJon

04-04-2005, 11:01 AM

Everyone knows Tarantino's best acting role was as a guy at a party in Sleep With Me. 

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fezident

04-04-2005, 11:36 AM

Nice to see that Tarantino is getting slammed in this thread.  He is EASILY the worst, most un-natural actor I've ever seen.  Pulp, Rez Dogs, FROM DUSK TIL DAWN??!  Ugh. The only acting that is MORE self aware and awkward is when PeeWee Herman plays the Hotel Receptionist at the end of PeeWees Big Adventure.  HONORABLE MENTION: Brad Pitt in Seven.  And Fight Club. And 12 Monkeys.  And Troy.

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Freakshow

04-04-2005, 04:18 PM

This thread is null and void since it does not contain Sandra Bullock in A Time to Kill (i'm from New England. And i'm a feminist. And miraculusly i'm exactly like Sandra Bullock in every movie i've ever been in, hehe). and Tom Petty in the Postman.

Tarantino might not be the greatest actor, but I kinda dug him in 4 Rooms.

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Alice S. Fuzzybutt

04-04-2005, 04:42 PM

Why does Tom Cruise have three Oscars? He plays the same pompous ass in every movie.

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I hope if dogs ever take over the world and they choose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Dachshunds with some good ideas.

torker

04-04-2005, 04:51 PM

"Why does Tom Cruise have three Oscars?" <img height="282" src="http://forum.canalstars.fr/canalstars/canalstars.nsf/0/D6941ED7B6AFF3E1C1256F94003FAF98/$file/warworlds_photo2.jpg" width="264" align="middle" border="0" />He wore the first two down to a nub.

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[center]Tell me, Sister Morphine, how long have
I been lying here?[center]

FUNKMAN

04-04-2005, 04:53 PM

[quote]50 worst acting performances of all time [quote]one of my old girlfriends having an orgasm... <img src="../../../../../../tiny_mce/plugins/emotions/images/thumbdown.gif" border="0" />

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Alice S. Fuzzybutt

04-04-2005, 04:59 PM

one of my old girlfriends having an orgasmWomen fake orgasms. Men fake entire relationships.

<IMG SRC=http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v303/Kevin2700/FUZZYcopy.jpg>

I hope if dogs ever take over the world and they choose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Dachshunds with some good ideas.

FUNKMAN

04-04-2005, 05:09 PM

[quote]Men fake entire relationships[quote]but only to make another woman happy...i got nuthin'

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Bulldogcakes

04-04-2005, 05:52 PM

quote:one of my old girlfriends having an orgasmWomen fake orgasms. Men fake entire relationships.

 

 Oh! Oh! Yes! I'd LOVE to go shopping with you! Oh! Yes! Yes
Baby!! Oh she's gonna try on another 12 dresses! Ohhhh Damn
you're so hot! No, honey, you dont look fat in that OOOOOOhhhhh
Ohhhhhhh AAAHHHHhhhh I need a cigarette. 


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Can placebos cause side effects? And if so, are the side effects real?











This message was edited by Bulldogcakes on 4-4-05 @ 10:04 PM

Bulldogcakes

04-04-2005, 06:08 PM

http://www.angelineking.com/test%20madonna%20smaller%20copy.jpgMadonna in "Desperately Seeking an Acting Coach" 

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Can placebos cause side effects? And if so, are the side effects real?

Bulldogcakes

04-04-2005, 06:11 PM

I hate these new fuckin tools. Which are SLOW AS SHIT 


<img border="0" src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v303/Kevin2700/bulldaogcopy.jpg" />

Can placebos cause side effects? And if so, are the side effects real?

This message was edited by Bulldogcakes on 4-4-05 @ 10:13 PM