You must set the ad_network_ads.txt file to be writable (check file name as well).
Closer [Archive] - RonFez.net Messageboard

Log in

View Full Version : Closer


ChickenHawk
12-03-2004, 11:47 AM
I saw this movie last night at a free screening and was pleasantly surprised. I went into it with low expectations, considering it's a love story with Julia Roberts in it... but I was wrong. It is not a happy cutesy love story by any means. It's not an amazing movie, but I would say it's certainly worth seeing. While Natalie Portman doesn't show any actual nip, you see PLENTY otherwise. You'll see just about every inch of skin outside of nipple and vag. And ass shots to the ceiling.
But the fantastic Portman skin aside, it's a quality flick. I gained a lot of respect for Clive Owen seeing this movie. I've never really seen him in a legitimate ACTING role until now and I was impressed. His character is easily my favorite in the movie.

<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=ChickenHawk">
HORDE KING FOREVER!!! ORACLE NEVER!!!
<strike>Shock</strike>
<marquee behavior=alternate><font size=2><b>EMFA</b></font></marquee>[color=white]

This message was edited by ChickenHawk on 12-3-04 @ 3:49 PM

Hoojibs
12-03-2004, 12:25 PM
Shots from the movie.

Click here. (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v299/lilvenom/natass.jpg)

<img src="http://hometown.aol.com/erzengel1/images/hj_sig.jpg">
Much thanks to M1 for the sig.

furie
12-03-2004, 12:31 PM
"I just want to make one thing clear; I do not like Julia Roberts moivies!"


<img src="http://homepage.mac.com/furie1335/.Pictures/rfsigs/neal1.jpg">

<a href="http://fallingtowardsapotheosis.blogspot.com/">mental vomit</a>

MrPink
12-03-2004, 09:04 PM
i agree with furie cause i have an odd hate fer julia roberts. i have hated her the first time i saw her fer no reason.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v507/Catholiccannon/pink.jpg
Thanks to Curtoid!

Snoogans
12-03-2004, 09:09 PM
furie was calling back to a Lynch song, the best one i might add

and julia roberts + love story + chickenhawk liking = FAG

http://home.comcast.net/~rmfallon/RFnetSnoogs.jpg
http://snoogans194.blogspot.com/
GO SAWX!!!!!
The worst choke job in the history of sports Snoogans 1, Monitor 0

TheMojoPin
12-03-2004, 10:04 PM
This ain't a love story.

This a "classic" Mike Nichols-type film...namely, one that's very talky and populated with brutally horrible people.

Just check out one of his older films, "Carnal Knowledge." Or his adaptation of "Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolf?" Or even "The Graduate." The people in Nichols' films may be pretty on the outside...but on the inside, they're hideous.

"Sex/love as a weapon"=Mike Nichols.

"Closer" is a fantastic film. You'll feel awful after watching it...but it's worth it. I wish the Julia Roberts's role had been played by Cate Blanchett like it was originally cast to be, but whatever. She's not good...but she's not bad. The movie thrives AROUND her.

CH, if you like Clive Owen, watch him in either "Croupier" or "I'll Sleep When I'm Dead." Clive RULES.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=TheMojoPin">
1979 << I love my drug buddy... >> "You can tell some lies about the good times we've had, but I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

Little Tony DeFranco
12-04-2004, 07:23 AM
Review: Closer
http://www.browntownjohnny.com/index.php

In the Christmas season, the studios try to put out a few 'high end' dramas with a huge name cast to get in the intellectual crowd. Sony went all out with hiring Julia Roberts and Jude Law (in 7 movies this year! 2 more to come) along with up and comers Clive Owen and Natalie Portman. The stage play "Closer" has been adapted by Patrick Marber from his hit London play. At the helm is stalwart film and theater director Mike Nichols, and this is not new territory for him to do a film about doomed relationships. His last 3 endeavors on film were stage productions, most noted from last years HBO event "Angels in America" which was on my 'best of' list for best event of last season. "Closer" is in line with his previous filmed "Carnal Knowledge" and "Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolfe", stories about the ugly side of the male-female love game.

A tricky script begins with a beautiful waif walking the streets of London and a passing fancy to a stranger triggers 'love at first sight'. Dan (Jude Law) hooks up with sexy Alice (Natalie Portman is fetching again), he is a writer (obits) and she is a stripper so love begins on a good note. Jump a year and Dan meets photographer Anna (Julia Roberts) and finds real love even though she is hurting from a divorce. She rejects him, and Alice sees the fire in Dan. Enter a dermatologist named Larry (Clive Owen), a victim of Dan's practical joke on the internet sex chat (the films funniest moment) leads him to a meeting with Anna. They fall in love and marry. Then it gets even more complicated with the lies and cheats when Anna decides to keep here relationship with Dan.......enough said and where it goes is even more whacked.

This movie can get pretty annoying. I loved the first half of the film and then it got repetitive with the storyline. Also, Nichols makes some editing blunders but his knack for sharp comic and static tension save the whole movie. The saving grace is the complex performances by Owen and Portman. Owen's Larry gets the best lines and Portman is mesmerizing to watch as Alice. The final shot of the movie is a stroll through Time Square that would stun any man into a sexual frenzy (those were not extras ogling her). The problem of stars Law and Roberts are there, the starpower overrides the roles. Therefore it doesn't grab me, that's just me I guess. Not as classic as Nichols' much better adaptations of plays. A disappointment, but still worth a look. For the guys....Portman doing a lapdance while Owen throws money at her and yells obscenities is classic enough.

Heartbeat is a Love Beat

ChickenHawk
12-04-2004, 10:24 AM
up and comers Clive Owen and Natalie Portman
This guy's calling Natalie Portman an "up-and-comer"? Is he on CRACK?

SHE'S IN FUCKING STAR WARS.

<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=ChickenHawk">
HORDE KING FOREVER!!! ORACLE NEVER!!!
<strike>Shock</strike>
<marquee behavior=alternate><font size=2><b>EMFA</b></font></marquee>[color=white]

Little Tony DeFranco
12-06-2004, 06:55 AM
you mean the shitty new "Star Wars" movies that suck ass

up and comers Clive Owen and Natalie Portman
This guy's calling Natalie Portman an "up-and-comer"? Is he on CRACK?

SHE'S IN FUCKING STAR WARS.

<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=ChickenHawk">
HORDE KING FOREVER!!! ORACLE NEVER!!!
<strike>Shock</strike>
<marquee behavior=alternate><font size=2><b>EMFA</b></font></marquee>[color=white]


You mean the shitty new 'Star Wars' movies that suck.

Heartbeat is a Love Beat

This message was edited by Little Tony DeFranco on 12-6-04 @ 10:56 AM

Reephdweller
12-06-2004, 07:14 AM
This guy's calling Natalie Portman an "up-and-comer"? Is he on CRACK?



So you're the one who still reads his reviews.

<center><IMG SRC="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/randomizer/random.php?uid=3">
Reefy's website... (http://www.osirusonline.com/)</center>
<font size="1" color="red">
<center>Check out The Ron and Fez Show Logs...UPDATED!!!!! (http://www.osirusonline.com/ronfez.htm)</center>
<marquee behavior=alternate bgcolor="#FFFFFF">Right now you could care less about me...
but soon enough you will care, by the time I'm done</marquee> </font>

Iamnotatool
12-06-2004, 07:25 AM
Natalie Portman = Goddess

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/iamnotatool.gif>
Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits

Hoojibs
12-06-2004, 07:46 AM
you mean the shitty new "Star Wars" movies that suck ass


No he means that Natalie Portman has been acting since she was 12/13 and has over ten years of acting experience under her belt, she's hardly and up and comer.

<img src="http://hometown.aol.com/erzengel1/images/hj_sig.jpg">
Much thanks to M1 for the sig.

Doctor Manhattan
12-06-2004, 07:57 AM
you mean the shitty new "Star Wars" movies that suck ass

It doesn't matter. They are still HUGE movies. Plus she's been in a bunch of other movies.

She was an "up and comer" in L‚on (AKA The Professional) a decade ago.

Clive Owen has been in a bunch of movies as well, since 1988.

<a href="http://www.fox.com/24"><img src="http://members.cox.net/nicksporsche/skw-sw-01.jpg" border=0 TARGET="_blank"></a>

This message was edited by SKW on 12-6-04 @ 11:59 AM

East Side Dave
12-06-2004, 12:45 PM
Natalie Portman was on "Inside the Actors Studio" a few nights ago and I must tell you, she was quite striking. Hopefully Ms. Portman likes going to websites based on radio programs and will read what I have written and fall in love with me. That's my goal. Now...we must wait....come on, baby, anytime now.....
And, Ms. Portman, please wear that outfit from Star Wars when your shirt was ripped otherwise it's no dice, baby.

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/ESD.gif>
Big Ass Mafia

Click this link (http://www.publicbroadcasting.net/thenight/ppr/index.shtml) to hear my show on 90.5 The Night FM;
Friday and Saturday Night: Midnight to 5 AM you bastards!

East Side Dave
12-06-2004, 12:50 PM
......i can't wait all day, honey.............

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/ESD.gif>
Big Ass Mafia

Click this link (http://www.publicbroadcasting.net/thenight/ppr/index.shtml) to hear my show on 90.5 The Night FM;
Friday and Saturday Night: Midnight to 5 AM you bastards!

Iamnotatool
12-07-2004, 05:48 AM
Wanna see Natalie as a stripper? Gents, I bring you, Closer. (http://www.ryoni.com/phpn/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=176&mode=&order=0&thold=0)


Takes a minute to load. Be patient.


<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/iamnotatool.gif>
Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits

This message was edited by Iamnotatool on 12-7-04 @ 9:48 AM

angie101
12-08-2004, 03:14 PM
how is jude law in this movie?

angie101- take the course

"why drink and drive..when you can smoke and fly"

Iamnotatool
12-08-2004, 03:22 PM
They probably cast him in it.

I can see crashing the set only working for a day or 2 tops, and then they'd probably have edited him out anyway..

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/iamnotatool.gif>
Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits

This message was edited by Iamnotatool on 12-8-04 @ 7:22 PM

Se7en
12-08-2004, 07:08 PM
Wanna see Natalie as a stripper? Gents, I bring you, Closer. (http://www.ryoni.com/phpn/modules.php?name=News&file=article&sid=176&mode=&order=0&thold=0)


Takes a minute to load. Be patient.se

Well, shit.

They've pretty much guaranteed that I'll be purchasing this DVD when it comes out.

<center><img border="0" src="http://se7enrfnet.homestead.com/files/bush.jpg" width="300" height="100">
<br>
Nov. 3, 2004 - It's official. Four more years!
There are those who said this day would never come.
What are they to say now? </center>

FUNKMAN
12-08-2004, 07:18 PM
that video did nothing for me

then again she's no Avril...

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/SatCam/sig_funkmanstill.jpg ">

IamFogHat
01-09-2005, 08:10 AM
Wow, so I just saw that movie last night and was blown away. I had low expectations for some reason and I completely loved it. Anyone feel the same way? The writing, acting, directing, all of it fabulous.

http://home.comcast.net/~stan_ferguson/dude_copy.jpg

The Dude abides

JohnnyCash
01-10-2005, 09:07 AM
This was the worst movie I've seen in a long time.

<img src=http://www.christpuncherrecords.com/sigs/cash_monster.jpg>
Thank you Freakshow.