Review: The Polar Express

[Little Tony DeFranco]

Review: The Polar Express
http://www.browntownjohnny.com/index.php


What would Christmas time be without a big-ass Santa fantasy flick form a big-ass studio with a big-ass star. Warner Bros went all out for "The Polar Express" by snagging Tom Hanks and director Robert Zemeckis (replacing Rob Reiner) and based on a classic kids book by Chris Van Allsburg (Jumanji). Zemeckis's has gone the animation route here since his classic "Roger Rabbit" and it breaks new ground for amazing computer graphics and use of real actors as models. Hanks is the star and has his hands full playing most of the roles (the Conductor, Santa, Hero Boy, Hobo Ghost, Dad) and it is topnotch direction to see Tom do it all.

This is a fine addition to the holiday movie season but it is far from classic...why? Because it is not a classic story. A boy is losing his belief in Santa, goes to sleep to wake up and go on a train to the North Pole to see Santa. Then he believes. The End! It's better than watching Ben Affleck doing pratfalls on the ice (asswipe whore).

This movie is a pure G rated roller coaster ride (literally) and it works but Zemeckis drops the ball in the final reel by selling out to the execs. An appearance by Aerosmith as Elves? Wasn't this a 60's style, old fashioned fable? Why did he sell out for a soundtrack bit? Wrong thing to do. I did get pissed off. Otherwise I thought it was very well done and beautiful to see what is topnotch animation. Hanks is the star and never fails to do his best, along with Zemeckis's old friend Eddie Deezen doing the voice of 'No It All Boy' (you know him when he talks). Hanks brings former 'Bosom Buddies' pal Peter Scolari in to play 'Lonely Boy', and some roles went to real life dwarf actors (a cool Yule thing). Merry Merry Christmas from The Big Man with the Jolly Laugh...BTJ

Heartbeat is a Love Beat

[East Side Dave]

This movie is a pure G rated roller coaster ride (literally)


We may have to take your movie-reviewing license from you for that one, Little Tony!! You might as well say you laughed, you cried, then you laughed some more!!!

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This message was edited by East Side Dave on 11-11-04 @ 9:20 AM

[torker]

You might as well say you laughed, you cried


and maybe,just maybe, learned a little something about life

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[Reephdweller]

I don't know. The animation to me looks weak and stupid. Nothing close to what a studio like Pixar could do with it. While I'd watch the movie on cable if it came out, I'd never pay to see it. Though I'll happily see The Incredibles or any other pixar movie any day of the week.

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[badorties]

looks horrible ...

except for 'roger rabbit' and 'back to the future,' i detest roger zemeckis movies -- especially ones starring tom hanks ...


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[kevcala]

An appearance by Aerosmith as Elves?

That is so annoying. I hate both Steven and Liv Tyler.

I might have liked Armagedon a little more if she wasn't in it and the movie wasn't one long Aerosmith Video.

Please note, I said "might"

And that commercial when the women flip out trying to get their cameras out to take the picture of Steven Tyler. The man looks like a real life Billy Bass

Take it Steven
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Big Ass #22981

[GodsFavoriteMan]

Never insult the Bass like that again.

Poor Billy, there there, it's okay. . .

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[Doctor Manhattan]

We may have to take your movie-reviewing license from you for that one, Little Tony!! You might as well say you laughed, you cried, then you laughed some more!!!


Anyone giving "White Chicks" a good review should be banned


'nuff said.

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[mdr55]

Anyone giving "White Chicks" a good review should be banned


'nuff said.

Did you even give White Chicks a chance?? Trust me it's funny.

[GodsFavoriteMan]

For the most part, to have seen Polar Express one must have paid to see Polar Express. And that, my friends, simply boggles the mind.

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[Doctor Manhattan]

Did you even give White Chicks a chance?? Trust me it's funny.

shhhhh! You'll be banned too!

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[TheMojoPin]

I'm the conductor of the bi-polar express.

Anyone want on?

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[Doctor Manhattan]

'Incredibles' ices 'Polar' at box office (http://www.cnn.com/2004/SHOWBIZ/Movies/11/14/box.office.reut/index.html)

Pixar's move made 51 million in it's second weekend while the Tom Hanks Stink Machine made less that half in its opening weekend (Opened on a Wed too, Incredibles opened on a Friday and made $71 million.

Pixar spent $92 million while Polar Express cost $165 Million to "film" and then animate. (CNN reports it cost $270 million to make and market, I guess all those Annoying commercials cost a lot!)

Looks like Hanks is now officially Box Office Poison, perhaps he and Ben Affleck should do a buddy film.



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This message was edited by SKW on 11-15-04 @ 8:31 AM

[Mike Teacher]

Way to blow it, Tom; Hanks a lot.

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[GodsFavoriteMan]

So the eternal question, "Is there such a thing as too much Hanks?" has been answered.

And it's a resounding, "Yes!"

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