What can you do with an ass?

[Johnny Fontane]

I remember playing basketball with a couple of friends when we were about 13. Billy was talking about this girl Nina, and he said her ass should be a national monument. My friend John replied, "what can you do with an ass?"

I don't recall if we gave him an answer, so this is as good a time as any. What can you do with an ass?



http://www.grandinotizie.it/image/g/000/00040.jpg
"The principal benefit acting has afforded me is the money to pay for my psychoanalysis."

[SatCam]

Ride it down the Grand Canyon.

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/SatCam/sig90_general_political.jpg" align="right" alt="LAL!" /><a href="http://www.satelitecam.tk">Ron and Fez Drops and Bits</a>
50%[color=white]

[FUNKMAN]

spank it

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[reeshy]

Take a dump?????

[center]<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=reeshy">
[center]

[Katylina]

Plant a chia pet.

<center>

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=katylina">
<a href="http://www.pagerealm.com/katylina/index.html" target=_new>Katylina's Web Page</a>
<br>
<br>
<marquee>I have no desire to make windows into men's souls.</marquee>

[reeshy]

Make a sundial!!!!!!!!

[center]<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=reeshy">
[center]

[BoondockSaint]

Give a Bronx cheer!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

[FUNKMAN]

scratch it

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[BoondockSaint]

Stomp a mudhole in it and walk it dry.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

[torker]

wear it like a hat

[JPMNICK]

slap it!

http://home.comcast.net/~nickcontardo/a_schilling_ft1.jpg
Thanks to Monsterone for my first sig.

[BoondockSaint]

Vote for it!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

[mikeyboy]

Make him a mod.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=mikeyboy">
Ron & Fez Show Log (http://www.osirusonline.com/ronfez.htm); Daily News Scratch N' Match is the Devil
Just because you don't listen doesn't mean I don't have a radio show
The Music Mikey Likes Show on RadioBBQ, weekdays 12-2 (http://www.radiobbq.net)

[reeshy]

Take it to Church and baptize it!!!!

[center]<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=reeshy">
[center]

[reeshy]

Call it Mojo???????

[center]<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=reeshy">
[center]

[morecowbell11]

according to bell biv devoe you can "smack it, flip it, rub it down"

im morecowbell11 and i approve this message

[East Side Dave]

Keep hamsters warm!

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/ESD.gif>
Big Ass Mafia

Click this link (http://www.publicbroadcasting.net/thenight/ppr/index.shtml) to hear my show on 90.5 The Night FM;
Friday and Saturday Night: Midnight to 5 AM you bastards!

[BoondockSaint]

Let a door hit it on your way out.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

[Doctor Manhattan]

What can you do with an ass?
walk into a porn video store. You'll see...

<a href="http://www.fox.com/24"><img src="http://members.cox.net/nicksporsche/sigfolder.jpg/sw3sig01.jpg" border=0></a>

[DJEvelEd]

Wipe the Diarrhea and pop the zits.

<img src="http://64.177.177.182/katylina/originoffeces.jpg">
PUTTING THE FUNNY IN PRESENTLY SEEN DEPTHS
SPONSORED BY: "THE F’CESTOF C’SAR" BY ’SOP c464 B.C.
HAS ANYONE SEEN MY BIG WET GAPING ’NUS FILLED WITH DIARRH’?

[FUNKMAN]

make bubbles

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[torker]

make one out of u and me

<IMG SRC=http://us.f2.yahoofs.com/users/41855e91zfa5977f1/torker131313/__sr_/b41b.jpg?pf8uqjBBejc9O.gs>
Jesus Titty-Fucking Christ

[sr71blackbird]

Dont click here unless you want to see a hot girls naked ass covered in closepins (http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:OKO8Q_LEqh8J:www.wayweird.com/archives/2003/aug/wild_tush.jpg)

<center>
http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/randomizer/random.php?uid=8 </center>


<center><B>My Thanks to Just Jon, Reefdwella, ADF, Yerdaddy,Monsterone and Katylina for the sig-pic help and creation!</B></center>
<marquee behavior=alternate><font size=1>Which Witch Wished Which Wicked Wish?</marquee>

[FUNKMAN]

hug it and squeeze it and name it George

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[Iamnotatool]

Dump half a tube of KY in it, the other half on your dick, and fuck the shit out of it. Literally.


Either that, or just pinch it.

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/iamnotatool.gif>
Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits

[FUNKMAN]

put it in, take it out, and shake it all about

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[BoondockSaint]

Go "brown nosein' " in it.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

[JPMNICK]

i would take a girl with a nice ass over big breasts anyday

http://home.comcast.net/~nickcontardo/a_schilling_ft1.jpg
Thanks to Monsterone for my first sig.

[FUNKMAN]

empty a room

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[PanterA]

You can do this,

http://penut.net/images/links/donkey.jpg



<center><img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=RFPantera"></center>

[BoondockSaint]

According to Cartman, you can shove food up it and crap out your mouth.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v11/squrl/huntnixsig.jpg

[torker]

strap it on

if it's cuban-bus-boy ass

<IMG SRC=http://us.f2.yahoofs.com/users/41855e91zfa5977f1/torker131313/__sr_/aeed.jpg?pfUPujBBAP1XJWm7>
It gives him the temerity to join the human race

[Evilpete]

I'd hit it....

<img src="http://www.hometown.aol.com/evilpete66/images/anisig.gif">


IM: Evilpete66
<li><a href="http://www.troubleintheterraces.blogspot.com/
">Blog (AKA random thoughts of a loser):</a></li>

[reeshy]

This is the first thread to make me laugh out loud in a year!!!!!!!!!!!! God bless you all.....you asses!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[center]<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=reeshy">
[center]

[A.J.]

http://www.simpsonloft.com/saison4/albums/15/9f13_51.jpg

<img src=http://img40.photobucket.com/albums/v124/Canofsoup15/Sigs/AJinDC-Sig.jpg>

A Skidmark/canofsoup15 production.

Red Sox Nation

[FUNKMAN]

crack walnuts

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[stickyfingers]

some have been known to Haul it

<img src=http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/sf2_sig.jpg>

[FUNKMAN]

spoon it


that can actually sound gross if you take it the wrong way

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[kevcala]

Don't just stare at it. Eat it.

<IMG SRC="http://home.hvc.rr.com/kevcala/kevcala_sig2.gif" ALIGN="left" WIDTH="301" ALT="Crud">

<MARQUEE>"I'll sit back bundled up, I'll sit back here and wait. I remember the past as wonderful though the pictures aren't that great." -atom and his package</MARQUEE>


Big Ass #22981

[IrishAlkey]

Have it pitch for the Sox...

<center><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v381/artemisentreri/alkey.gif"></center>

[A.J.]

Have it punch a clubhouse wall...

<img src=http://img40.photobucket.com/albums/v124/Canofsoup15/Sigs/AJinDC-Sig.jpg>

A Skidmark/canofsoup15 production.

Red Sox Nation

[IrishAlkey]

Touche.

<center><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v381/artemisentreri/alkey.gif"></center>

[JPMNICK]

give him a contract to do mornings on Sirius Satellite radio

http://home.comcast.net/~nickcontardo/a_schilling_ft1.jpg
Thanks to Monsterone for my first sig.

[mikeyboy]

Sell him the Orioles.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=mikeyboy">
Ron & Fez Show Log (http://www.osirusonline.com/ronfez.htm); Daily News Scratch N' Match is the Devil
Just because you don't listen doesn't mean I don't have a radio show
The Music Mikey Likes Show on RadioBBQ, weekdays 12-2 (http://www.radiobbq.net)

[Reephdweller]

Argue with cops at a cathedral to get yourself arrested and kill a number one drive time radio show off for two years and relegate it to satellite radio.

<center><IMG SRC="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/randomizer/random.php?uid=3">
Reefy's website... (http://www.osirusonline.com/)</center>
<font size="1" color="red">
<center>Check out The Ron and Fez Show Logs...UPDATED!!!!! (http://www.osirusonline.com/ronfez.htm)</center>
<marquee behavior=alternate bgcolor="#FFFFFF">Right now you could care less about me...
but soon enough you will care, by the time I'm done</marquee> </font>

[jocefus]

bounce a quarter off of it

http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=jocefus



Big ups to amy, aggie, satcam,adf fluff and can of soup for the sigs..

hey my man, what it look like

[JPMNICK]

Make him get a tatoo with the score of the Redskins - Lions game from this weekend

http://home.comcast.net/~nickcontardo/a_schilling_ft1.jpg
Thanks to Monsterone for my first sig.

[torker]

Well, I can make a hat, or a broach, or pterodactyl

<IMG SRC=http://us.f2.yahoofs.com/users/41855e91zfa5977f1/torker131313/__sr_/aeed.jpg?pfUPujBBAP1XJWm7>
Pangaean-American

[FUNKMAN]

hide salami

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[JPMNICK]

eat sushi off of it

http://home.comcast.net/~nickcontardo/a_schilling_ft1.jpg
Thanks to Monsterone for my first sig.

[IrishAlkey]

Argue with it in every thread on the board having to do with O&A...

<center><img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v381/artemisentreri/alkey.gif"></center>

[FUNKMAN]

toss salad

or go shrimping

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[East Side Dave]

Photogaph it and give the pictures to Arnold Friedman!!

<img src=http://www.richstillwell.com/ESD.gif>
Big Ass Mafia

Click this link (http://www.publicbroadcasting.net/thenight/ppr/index.shtml) to hear my show on 90.5 The Night FM;
Friday and Saturday Night: Midnight to 5 AM you bastards!

[Iamnotatool]

Make it dwell in a reef.

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/iamnotatool.gif>
Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits

[Donnielimes]

Rim It!! Brando said 'abundancy' is what you should be looking for according to Matthew Broderick in today's Daily News. Lick some BIGASS!!!

"Good Times/Noodle Salad, Thats my story"

[WNEWstinks]

Do what I do, shave it.

I'M GETTING BILLY STAPLES BIG ASS CARD!!!

[Iamnotatool]

14 year old girls have hairy asses?

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/iamnotatool.gif>
Please don't hold my huge nutbag against me, or I'll hold it against you that you have flapjack tits

[JamMaster]

Get a tattoo of Roy Orbison...

http://ynucc.yeungnam.ac.kr/~bwlee/gifs/royleft.jpg


"What Mamma don't know wont hurt her"

Ignorance, Predjudice and Fear Walk Hand in Hand - Neil Peart

This message was edited by reddyj31 on 11-10-04 @ 2:05 PM

[JPMNICK]

he forgot the second part to the Shave It idea which is

and teach it to walk backwards

http://home.comcast.net/~nickcontardo/a_schilling_ft1.jpg
Thanks to Monsterone for my first sig.

[Katylina]

Eat the corn out of it.

<center>

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=katylina">
<a href="http://www.pagerealm.com/katylina/index.html" target=_new>Katylina's Web Page</a>
<br>
<br>
<marquee>I have no desire to make windows into men's souls.</marquee>

[FUNKMAN]

break your foot off in it



<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[Hottub]

Pop the zits on it, use the spewtum as a lube, and fuck her 'til the cows come home.





*This post was officially sanctioned by DJEvelEd.*


F’CES

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v381/artemisentreri/hottub.gif" border=0 align=right>

"Ahh, Beer. The cause of, and answer to all of life's problems"
Big A.S.S.#22127
The Cruising Vessel (http://www.silentpix.com/modules.php?op=modload&name=Myalbums&file=thumbnails&album=41)

[FUNKMAN]

make mol'ass'es

<img src="http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm_sig.jpg">

[TheMojoPin]

Make it haul my fucking coffee, like it should.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=TheMojoPin">
1979 << I love my drug buddy... >> "You can tell some lies about the good times we've had, but I've kissed your mother twice...and now I'm working on your dad..."

[SatCam]

make whoopy

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/SatCam/sig90_general_political.jpg" align="right" alt="LAL!" /><a href="http://www.satelitecam.tk">Ron and Fez Drops and Bits</a>
50%[color=white]

[reeshy]

KICK IT!!!!!

[center]<IMG SRC="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=reeshy">
[center]

[SatCam]

Have brunch for two

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/SatCam/sig90_general_political.jpg" align="right" alt="LAL!" /><a href="http://www.satelitecam.tk">Ron and Fez Drops and Bits</a>
50%[color=white]

[sr71blackbird]

Use each cheek as a bun and make a shit sandwich

<center>
http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/randomizer/random.php?uid=8 </center>


<center><B>My Thanks to Just Jon, Reefdwella, ADF, Yerdaddy,Monsterone and Katylina for the sig-pic help and creation!</B></center>
<marquee behavior=alternate><font size=1>Which Witch Wished Which Wicked Wish?</marquee>

[Justice4all]

Put it in the middle of Fenway Park and make it feel at home with the thousands and thousands of other asses.










































































Yes I know I am bitter...so what!

<img src=http://home.ix.netcom.com/~camman/_uimages/Justice4All.gif>
"What did he want???"
"What do all men want Phillip?"
"He wants you to dress up like Wonder Woman, tie him up with your golden lariat and force him to tell the truth?????"

[Justice4all]

Or you could make a sunday out of it.

<img src=http://home.ix.netcom.com/~camman/_uimages/Justice4All.gif>
"What did he want???"
"What do all men want Phillip?"
"He wants you to dress up like Wonder Woman, tie him up with your golden lariat and force him to tell the truth?????"

[stickyfingers]

shock it.

<img src=http://img18.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/sf2_sig.jpg>

[FUNKMAN]

stick in your thumb and pull out a plum


eewwwww!!!!

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v53/monster6sixty6/guests/fm3_sig.jpg">

[SatCam]

Bust it anyway you see fit.

<img src="http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v91/SatCam/sig90_general_political.jpg" align="right" alt="LAL!" /><a href="http://www.satelitecam.tk">Ron and Fez Drops and Bits</a>
50%[color=white]

[MrPink]

eat it

"Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me"

[sham-i-am]

Red Sox Nation

"Red Sox Nation?"

THAT'S ASSinNINE.

[color=Navy]Fluke.

[mikeyboy]

Red Sox Nation

"Red Sox Nation?"

THAT'S ASSinNINE.

[color=Navy]Fluke.



Are you not a sports fan? Obviously you have no idea what the Red Sox Nation is.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=mikeyboy">
Ron & Fez Show Log (http://www.osirusonline.com/ronfez.htm); Daily News Scratch N' Match is the Devil
Just because you don't listen doesn't mean I don't have a radio show
The Music Mikey Likes Show on RadioBBQ, weekdays 12-2 (http://www.radiobbq.net)

[sham-i-am]

Red Sox Nation

"Red Sox Nation?"

THAT'S ASSinNINE.

[color=Navy]Fluke.



Are you not a sports fan? Obviously you have no idea what the Red Sox Nation is.



Without Pedro I'd say it's history. Lessee, the Yanks lost their pitchers last year, and it looks like the Sox are losing theirs this year. (BTW, notice the navy on the word fluke.)

Do you think that Morrison meant the Red Sox when he sang "champion Sox and a girl named Candy..." on the Soft Parade?

Yankees again next year. Baseball the way it's supposed to be.

This message was edited by sham-i-am on 12-20-04 @ 2:17 PM

[mikeyboy]

Red Sox Nation

"Red Sox Nation?"

THAT'S ASSinNINE.

[color=Navy]Fluke.



Are you not a sports fan? Obviously you have no idea what the Red Sox Nation is.



Without Pedro I'd say it's history. Lessee, the Yanks lost their pitchers last year, and it looks like the Sox are losing theirs this year. (BTW, notice the navy on the word fluke.)

Do you think that Morrison meant the Red Sox when he sang "champion Sox and a girl named Candy..." on the Soft Parade?

Yankees again next year. Baseball the way it's supposed to be.

This message was edited by sham-i-am on 12-20-04 @ 2:17 PM

Again. I don't think you understand the term. There's a difference between Red Sox Nation and Red Sox Dynasty. The Red Sox Nation has been around long before this year.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=mikeyboy">
Ron & Fez Show Log (http://www.osirusonline.com/ronfez.htm); Daily News Scratch N' Match is the Devil
Just because you don't listen doesn't mean I don't have a radio show
The Music Mikey Likes Show on RadioBBQ, weekdays 12-2 (http://www.radiobbq.net)

[sham-i-am]

Again. I don't think you understand the term. There's a difference between Red Sox Nation and Red Sox Dynasty. The Red Sox Nation has been around long before this year.

<img src="http://scripts.cgispy.com/image.cgi?u=mikeyboy">
Ron & Fez Show Log (http://www.osirusonline.com/ronfez.htm); Daily News Scratch N' Match is the Devil
Just because you don't listen doesn't mean I don't have a radio show
The Music Mikey Likes Show on RadioBBQ, weekdays 12-2 (http://www.radiobbq.net)


I know what you're saying, the problem is the population of the Red Sox Nationhas grown significantly with all the posers who want to be on the side of a winner. It seems that sucess has blurred the line between the two. Happens all the times with Yankee fans. We get a lot of people who just want a winner, so this has been a great way to ween out the posers. ;)

[Bulldogcakes]

Lets get this thread back on track

An ass? Make it Al Duke's girlfriend.
Wait, I'm sorry, that would be a Dog's ass.


NO! I'm not dating Al Dukes, smartass!



http://pic5.picturetrail.com/VOL77/857148/1548180/76422236.jpg


Ow! Hey! Get that net offa me! Ouch! Help!! Somebody HELP!!!!

This message was edited by Bulldogcakes on 12-26-04 @ 9:25 AM