i am "scared" of a few places

[AngelAmy]

when i say scared i mean these places make me terribly uncomfortable and i do everything in my power to stay away from them. i dont know why im scared of these places, but i am.

-the post office

-panera bread

-i hate when i am looking around victoria's secret and the people come up to me and ask me if i need help....i leave right after because i get so nervous.

-in the same idea of victoria's secret, i hate when im in the mall and looking at the lil stuff on the carts and the people are all up on me and after like 5 minutes of stalking, they ask if they can help me....i also leave right away when that happens

-if i walk into certain stores in the mall i feel like i don't belong and people are judging me so i try to avoid going in...abercrombie and fitch, the gap, american eagle, i love shopping at aeropostale but even that place i feel like i am being judged.

thats it for now....im sure ill think of more later. i think there is something wrong with me.

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[jeffdwright2001]

If I recall, you mentioned a fear of phones a while back.

Any chance that you don't really have a fear of phones, its a fear of people. Particularly a fear of how you think people perceive you?

[AngelAmy]

yeah thats bascially what it is. anyone i am not comfortable around, i am nervous around. sometimes i come off anti-social or stuck up but the fact is that im just scared and panicing on the inside.

i just wanna get over it.

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[Tall_James]

You were very nice to me when we met at the Big Ass Night of Frights. Hopefully that wasn't because you are afraid of benevolent giants.

I am scared of balconies on the upper floors of apartment buildings with small railings. And since I am tall, most railings are way to small for my liking.


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[DreamWeaver]

If salespeople would just learn to leave the consumer alone when they're shopping they'd probably get alot more sales. Whenever I go into Macy's to smell the perfumes the saleswoman will come right up my ass and ask if I want to smell this and that fragrance. And then they don't leave! They will stand over me like a hawk. I have no choice but to leave immediately.

The cart people are bad too! They think everyone is a thief and they don't take their eyes off you for a second. And it's not like you can wonder off and look at something else around the cart. The only option is to bolt.


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[Reephdweller]

I hate when they do that in stores. They come up to you or follow you and ask questions. Worst of all is the moment you walk into the store and they're on you like vultures. Just leave me alone. Nothing gets me out of a store quicker than a pushy sales person. Generally if I'm in a store, I'm there because I intend to buy something. If I need you I'll look for you. Just don't bother me.

I don't mind if they greet when you walk in the store, it's not so much of a problem for that, but if I need help I'll ask for it. Also, I understand the people are just doing their jobs and doing what they're told, but these places need to change their policy and just let people look on their own.

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[AngelAmy]

I am scared of balconies on the upper floors of apartment buildings with small railings.


i totally know what you mean. in the mall i cant even stand near the railing thing on the second floor. when im at a friends apt on his balcony i cant stand near the edge too...i just get a very panicy feeling over my whole body when i get a certain distance from it.

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[grlNIN]

This is not the girl i knew who came to pick me up & take me to my first ever Bar 9.

What did you do with my Amy?!!?!?!?

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[Reephdweller]

in the mall i cant even stand near the railing thing on the second floor.


I used to have that problem, i'd feel like someone was going to push me over or something. Though I guess at some point I just got over it.


I think my worst experience was when I was a kid, I was in the boy scouts and we climbed Bear Mountain. There was this area where there was all kinds of giant rocks overlooking water, it went up sort've like a cliff. My friends decided to climb it and so basically I had to go along with them. I had to walk along this very very thin edge of rock with the heels and tips of my sneakers to scale it. We had no ropes or anything, and below us was huge rocks and water. I remember being terrified that I was going to fall. I even slipped at one point near the end, thankfully one of my friends grabbed my hand and helped pull me up.

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[AngelAmy]

sometimes its easier for me when i have someone with me....but sometimes that doesnt even help.

in a few minutes i have to go to the post office to buy some stamps....thats kinda what sparked this thread. im freaking out about it.

i know its all in my head but i dont know how to help myself.

i know ill need to get over it if im ever going to survive in the real world. im afraid i never will.

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[Reephdweller]

in a few minutes i have to go to the post office to buy some stamps....thats kinda what sparked this thread. im freaking out about it.


Thank god most post offices have vending machines!

:)

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[Tall_James]

I think my worst experience was when I was a kid, I was in the boy scouts and we climbed Bear Mountain. There was this area where there was all kinds of giant rocks overlooking water, it went up sort've like a cliff. My friends decided to climb it and so basically I had to go along with them. I had to walk along this very very thin edge of rock with the heels and tips of my sneakers to scale it.

Try doing it at 2 am with a styrofoam cooler of beer and fireworks strapped to your back. The climb sucked but ambushing our sleeping friends at the top with a bottle rocket volley....PRICELESS !


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[Jennitalia]

This is not the girl i knew who came to pick me up & take me to my first ever Bar 9.

What did you do with my Amy?!!?!?!?




I think the effects of inhaling cat piss are finally kicking in.

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[Mike Teacher]

in a few minutes i have to go to the post office to buy some stamps....thats kinda what sparked this thread. im freaking out about it.


Could be Agoraphobia? From one of a bazillion sites:

Agoraphobia is one of the three main groups of phobias. It manifests itself as a fear of crowds, open spaces, and public places. The fear is especially acute if it seems like there is no escape. The agoraphobic is also fearful of being incapacitated by the fear they have of the situation, and they are afraid of loosing control in front of people that they do not know.

Literally, this means fear (phobos) of the marketplace (agora). This is believed to affect as many as 4% of people, although females seem to be twice as likely to suffer from this fear.

There is a wide variety of situational triggers, some that affect some people, and others that do not. Some triggers include: large crowds, few people, darkness, light. For some any of these attributes can help them deal with the fear. Some agoraphobes experience a lot of fear, others also experience panic.

The most crippling aspect of this phobia is that the agoraphobe will avoid encountering the feared situation, and many normal things in life can be come nearly impossible. For many agoraphobes, the only way they can cope is to become housebound.

----

I have had this intensely in the past; before and after, but weirdly, not during when I taught. It reached a point where I went into a Mall, and lasted about 90 seconds before I was headed for an Exit. It can be a fear of 'open-ness' or of a smple lack of control about the situation.

I've so been there. It went away. Dont know why.



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[Jennitalia]

I had freaked out a lot a couple of years ago, any time I made plans to get together with friends. I would look forward to doing things with them, but would bow out the day we were supposed to get together. I would just go into a panic. Same thing if I went to a mall or something. I'm also "cured" now. I was going through a really bad time back then, and had severe depression, and I'm sure that's why I felt like that.

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[FUNKMAN]

I always get a little nervous before i meet with my Manager for my yearly review. I haven't received a bad reveiew in the 16 years i'm at my company but i have that 'you never know' kind of feeling...

I get a little nervous in Parking garages when i'm between levels. I don't want to leave this world crushed in my car like a sardine in a can of tomatoe sauce...

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[AngelAmy]

i kinda feel that way about bridges...i always think "what if we fall" to myself as i drive over a bridge. i dont let it get the best of me, but the fear is always there. i just try not to look over and down but over and beyond.

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[FUNKMAN]

i get a little 'panicky' in the ocean too... i find myself constantly looking for 'large dark shadows' coming at me or shark fins ...

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[East Side Dave]

I'm scared of antique furniture, words that end in "d" or "th," and pointy objects.....


I'm.........




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[JesterOfSadness]

For alot of retail businesses we usually have to ask the customer if they need assistance or some shit because they use some called a mystery shopper.

Meaning that the store or company pays people to go into a store and see how the store looks, if anything is a mess and to see how the customer service is.

Basically we get paranoid that if we dont ask people if they need help, our bosses will be on our asses asking why they didnt get a 100% on their Mystery shop,etc and how that since we failed it they wont get their bonuses.

I failed 2 in a row so far and still climbing

Better yet, Just swallow some jacks-CM Punk

[sr71blackbird]

I think what you might need is to do what I do. You remember when we went to Red Lobster and Im talking with the waitress as if I know her and stuff? I use to be totally scared of people, but I overcame it with some humor and maybe making them feel a little uneasy. Tony can attest to times he thought that things Id say would have gotten me in trouble with somones boyfriend or thrown out of resturants. Its not that I make them feel threatened, I throw them off. When they are thrown off, they dont know what to say and they leave you alone in the worst case, or laughing with you in the best case. They are just people. Dont worry who judges you. No amount of anxiety you can throw on yourself can change anyones mind about anything. In a store like Victorias secret, do you think that they are sizing you up and would have the balls to say something about it to your face and still stay employed? But even if they did, you dont have to give them any money and you walk out. Remember my analogy with the yellow jacket? Its a bee, small and insignificant, but it strikes terror in you because you cant control it. Your scared because its so small and not intimidated by you. Look how much bigger you are than a bee. Next to another person, your much more intimidating! Be the bee!
Next time we hang out, I'll show you that nothing bad happens when I encourage a discussion with a stranger. Its good to get over this too so other people who already know the bee analogy dont try to take advantage of you.

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[Katylina]

I am scared of the drivers on the LIE. In fact, I refuse to drive it and will either have someone else drive, or find another route.

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[more cowbells]

I'm afraid of driving over bridges. It scares the hell out of me. I just look straight ahead and hold on to the steering wheel so tight that my hands literally turn blue, that's how scared I get.

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[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

I get it. I'm afraid of Macy's or any place I might get sprayed with a perfume sample.


I'm afraid of driving over bridges. It scares the hell out of me. I just look straight ahead and hold on to the steering wheel so tight that my hands literally turn blue, that's how scared I get.


I SOOOOO get that one! I have SO much trouble with the Raritan Bridge. The lanes get more narrow. I panic when I'm next to a bus. They run into lanes like it's nothing.

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[sr71blackbird]

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Focus dude!!

I ignore it if I am on a bridge. I trust that the ground beneath me is solid. The only time I panic is when I am in a tight area or near an accident scene (where you are in the highest likelyhood of being involved in an accident--avoid them, get away fast- dont even look at the accident scene) or when passing a vehicle that blocks the view of someone who might be coming out on the roadway - I fear that a car will suddenly shoot out into my lane (it happened to me and I crashed). When I first started driving I imagined my car from above as I drove, as if I was looking down on it. The most important thing is to adjust your mirrors. When you look at the side view mirrors, you should see a portion of the cars rear quarter panel in the image as well as somewhat dehind you and the entire lane next to you. When you drive, if you clasped the very top of the wheel with both hands, both your shoulders should be pressed into the seat and your arms straight (this will enable you to remain in control even if the car is skidding because you wont be thrown about). Continuously scan with your eyes as you drive from left side mirror to windshield to rearview mirror to right sideview. Do this often. You should see some of the sideview mirrors with your pheripheral vision while looking ahead out the windshield. Try to relax your eyes and "aim high" keeping your attention not focused on the ground, rather, higher up. Youll notice if your looking towards the top of your monitor, you can easily see the desk and objects on it. But look at the desk--can you see details on the top of the monitor? No. Aim high.

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[reeshy]

I'm so afraid of naughty places!!

one thing that gets to me is a crowded elevator...I've been known to let 3 o4 go by if there are more than 3 or 4 people in it...this fear is based on reality..several years ago I was trapped in a Housing Authority elevator(the world's smallest and smelliest elevators) with my partner and a psycho case...he decided to go psycho the whole time we were trapped in there (over 45 minutes until ES could get us out!!!!!!!!!) Fun times...how I miss that job!!!!!

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This message was edited by Mr. Bad Touch on 4-28-04 @ 7:40 AM

[FUNKMAN]

sometimes i get nervous when i'm driving behind one of them trucks that carry a bunch of cars. I'm thinking one of the cars is gonna fall off...

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[Freakshow]

When people in stores come up and ask if I need help, I say i'm just looking, even if I do need help. I'm not really scared, but something keeps me saying anything else.


I am scared of phones, however. Thank god for the internet and email.



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