Ever get caught in a SLOW?

[Reephdweller]

I totally hate it when I'm on the road and I'm trying to get somewhere and there's nothing but open road ahead of me, and both lanes in front of me have cars going excrutiatingly slow and in almost perfect alignment with each other forcing you to either go into on-coming traffic to get around them or just deal with it.

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[fluffernutter]

I know sometimes this happens as the pure chance of two senior citizens being nnext to one another and it almost sems like they are playing dominoes together while they are driving. It can be annoying.

Back in my younger years some friends of mine and I decioded to do this just to be assholes. We held up rush hour Christmas shopping traffic for about 5 miles while doing this up the PA 309 Expressway. First time, last time but it was fun. Sure glad I grew up from that. And cops? Where? What cops?

Kindest Regards, Your Fluff

[Death Metal Moe]

The only thing worse than that in my mind is rubbernecking. ESPECIALLY for the OTHER SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!

CHRIST! There's a broken down car on the other side of the road so all the jerk offs on MY side of the road have to slow down? For what? Afraid you're never gonna see a tow truck again? Or maybe to satsify your morbid curiosity? Hope you see a body or something?

I've seen a man on the side of the road covered with a sheet before surrounded in shit to soak up the blood and it's a sight I wish I could forget. He had on work boots that looked just like mine, and it made me realize how easily it could be me one day.

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[FUNKMAN]

i got caught in a bunch of SLOW today, except it consisted of a bunch of cars and a bunch of traffic lights...

last night my central-air stopped working, the blower in the house was working but the unit outside was not. i dicked around in the dark at 2:30am with a troubleshooting sheet i got off the net... today my dad came over and we figured it was an outside switch that wouldn't turn back ON or another piece on the unit where all the wires attached, there were 8 wires.

Anyway! it took no more than 5-10 minutes to remove the switch and wiring thing, but it took 2 1/2 FUCKING hours to run around and find the parts...

then 5 to 10 minutes to put it back together....

have to say i got a bit stressed...



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[Death Metal Moe]

You wouldn't like Funkman when he's stuck in traffic.

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[Reephdweller]

You wouldn't like Funkman when he's stuck in traffic.


Yeah, but I think I'd rather deal with the Hulk than the wrath of the Weathercutioner. But maybe that's just me.

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<font size="1" color="red">
<marquee behavior=alternate bgcolor="#FFFFFF">right now you could care less about me...
but soon enough you will care, by the time Im done</marquee> </font>

[FUNKMAN]

who dare speaketh my name?

http://image.weather.com/web/common/wxicons/52/38.gif

BEWARE! His cloud is ominous, and not harmonious.



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[Death Metal Moe]

Good point reef. Because the Weathercutioner, or WC as I will call him from now on because his name is too fucking long, could CAUSE traffic with his weather abilities. So he is much more dangerous on the road.

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[FUNKMAN]

or WC?

http://image.weather.com/web/common/wxicons/52/38.gif

BEWARE! I am the Weathercutioner. Those who choose to call me WC will have their bacon burnt beyond recognition, Biotch!

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[sr71blackbird]

I was in a slow last week, and it was an old man in front and to my right was another old man and they were both going the exact same speed so getting around them was impossible. So I did something Id never done before; I started weaving in my lane, getting very close to the old man on my right, which must have spooked him into thinking there was something wrong with my car or I was a nut or whatever. Anyway, he slowed down (older people are extremely cautious) and I used his space cushion to go into what I call "Barrel Mode" which is essentially a step up from "Blow Mode". Blow mode you begin speeding up angrily. Barrel mode means that you dont care whats in front of you and dont care what color a light is, if there are Canada Geese crossing the road or whatever, you just Aint Stopping. People who see someone in Barrel Mode 99% of the time will get out of their way, or be T Boned off to the side of the road. Its very effective.

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Many Thanks Soup!

[SatCam]

Because the Weathercutioner, or WC as I will call him from now on because his name is too fucking long

You're confusing our good friend the WeatherCutioner with the Water Closet, aka the Bathroom.

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[Alice S. Fuzzybutt]

Sometimes I wish I had a digital scroll on my car so I could tell people in the left lane, "The left lane is for passing, NOT traveling. You're going 60, as is the idiot in fron of me is. See all that open road ahead of you? Get the fuck out of my way so I can be there!"

A little wordy, but it's what I usually mutter on the GSP.

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thank you dcpete!

[Reephdweller]

A little wordy, but it's what I usually mutter on the GSP.


Yeah, I generally don't mutter when I get caught in a slow, I usually scream.

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<font size="1" color="red">
<marquee behavior=alternate bgcolor="#FFFFFF">right now you could care less about me...
but soon enough you will care, by the time Im done</marquee> </font>

[more cowbells]

I drive an ambulance at work with a duel siren, so I have my chance of blasting these assholes right off of the road.

Revenge is sweet sometimes....I'm the guy that causes other accidents.

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[high fly]

I hate it when they pass a joint from one car to the other when I have none.

" and they ask me why I drink"

[CaptClown]

I keep looking for a car with the James Bond/ Spyhunter weapons options on it just for these occasions. I haven't found it yet, but when I do I'll let you know.

Director of the C.Y.A. Society.
Field Marshal of the K.I.S.S. Army

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[sr71blackbird]

The horn system of cars should be equipped to eject a steam of paint when the horn is pressed, thereby "marking" the car that causes horns to be honked. If you then get behind a car that has numerous paint splatters on it, youll know this guy causes "slows" and you can take evasive manouvers before you find yourself hoplessly caught in a "slow".

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Many Thanks Soup!

This message was edited by sr71blackbird on 8-6-03 @ 9:52 PM

[Heavy]

Speaking of traffic, it took me about an hour to get from the Throgs Neck to the 3rd ave exit off the Cross Bronx. Bumper to bumper the whole way. Then about 100 feet from the exit it picks up to warp speed out of nowhere and what do i see? SOme siren on the other side of the higway. I felt like killing people

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[high fly]

...James Bond/Spyhunter weapons...

The axle extensions from Spartacus would be enough for me.

" and they ask me why I drink"