Fear of Failure

[Tenbatsuzen]

I've been miserable for the past few weeks because of my employment status and I feel like I'm spinning my wheels in my current job.

I just saw a posting for a DREAM JOB on Tuesday... something I've been wanting my entire adult life... and I haven't done anything about it because I'm afraid that I'll just be rejected.

And even though I've been rejected before, I'm not sure why I'm so slow to reacting to this job posting and sending in my materials.

This fear of failure has been constant. And I wonder why it's so prevalent in my life.

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[Zoefus]

Illegitimi non carborundum

translates: Don't let the bastards get you down

Go for it

[TheMojoPin]

Plastics.

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2% << December boys got it BAD. >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[Reephdweller]

Tenbats, you'll never know until you try. I had lots of fears of rejection years ago and I kept letting it get to me. The best thing you can do for yourself is take a chance and go for it. Whether you get it or not, it pays to make the effort. If you don't get the job, try to figure out why you didn't and build on it. It's the same with anything where you have to deal with the possibility of rejection. I can't say I'm completely over it myself, but when the time comes and I have to deal with things I at least give it my best.

If there's the girl at the bar or the party and you want to talk to her but feel rejected, it's the same thing. Find the courage - walk up and introduce yourself, try talking. If you get rejected there'll always another one. I know it's not that easy but the more you try, the more likely you'll be to find the job or the person you want.

On job interviews, the one thing I've learned most is that they want someone who will be confident and well spoken. The best way to build confidence is to just keep trying and give it your best shot. Because when you do succeed you'll feel really good that you actually went for it and did it. Hope this helps.

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[FUNKMAN]

Because when you do succeed you'll feel really good that you actually went for it and did it.


and even if you don't succeed you may learn a thing or two about how to succeed the next time a similar opportunity arises...

the foremost reason I believe you should make the attempt is because then you do not have to go over and over in your mind about what "may" have happened... that could be tormenting...



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[golfcourseguy]

The biggest regrets I have in life are over the things "I didn't do" not mistakes I made trying.
Learning that "both sides" can interview was a powerful ( and calming) tool in the process.



" editing posts since day one"

[reeshy]

I agree with golfcourseguy. The things that bug me the most are the things that I didn't try-not the things that I did try and failed. At least I learned my limitations but if I don't try I will never know them and really experience what I am capable of-which is really alot now that I think of it- now I feel better-thanks!!!

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[HordeKing1]

TENBATSUZEN - It's clear you're unhappy about your current job. You've found a job listing for what you descirbe as a "dream job...somthing I've been wanting my entire adult life."

You seem to be paralyzed by the idea of being rejection to such an extent that it is preventing you from taking any action from securing this dream job.

You have a lot of intense emotional investment in obtaining this particular job. You've desired it for so long. It's your dream job. If you apply and don't get the position it may be a substantial blow to your ego and self-esteem.

Given the pressure you've put yourself under to capture this dream job, you've placed yourself in a situation where anything less than securing the job is a failure. It is not. Merely applying for the job is a success because it breaks the paralysis that grips you because of a fear of failure.

Consider that allowing this fear to paralyze you is also a blow to your self-esteem. By not applying, you're forcing your ego to accept that if you apply you'll fail. There's just no way that you can know this in advance.

If the job is desireable, there will certainly be compitition for it. But you have as much chance of getting it as the next guy - but ONLY if you apply for the position.

I'll be happy to talk to you privately about the overall feeling of failure that you describe, but the board is not necesarily the best place to do so. If you want to, of course, we can continue here. Otherwise contact me.

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