Long story game.

[Reephdweller]

...the former Heavy Weight Champion Mike Tyson had once again found his true long lost love Johnnywadd, diseased and sore from the repeated anal intrusions, and still smarting from losing his dick to the squirrel on page one, a poor pathetic Johnnywadd had to sit there and take all the love that Mike had for him, it wasn't until after all the sex that he....

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=go2osirus">

<marquee behavior=alternate scrolldelay=30>The digital pimp, hard at work...</marquee>

[reeshy]

that he promised to never, never, NEVER lie about those so-called dreams again. Then he turned to Mike, dropped his sari, smiled and said.....

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:vAT5eb31tzMC:www.rp-online.de/news/bilder/bildershows/bilder2002-0909/bilder2002-0909/lewis.jpg>

[Tall_James]

"Sari I have no dink Misstah Mike! How you like number 2 love? Chop Chop?"

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Def Dave in SC]

"Thuttup bitch," screamed Mike. "I do the funny voithes around here! I'm gonna rip out your larynex until you love me, faggot!!"




Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/```def.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
Much Love to my Homie dcpete

UCF:AYBABTU

[reeshy]

Wadd said " Oh, you say the sweetest things" but then he did something very strange- He hit Mike as hard as he could(teehee) right in the face-Mike didn't bat an eyelash- he just...

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:vAT5eb31tzMC:www.rp-online.de/news/bilder/bildershows/bilder2002-0909/bilder2002-0909/lewis.jpg>

[Tall_James]

smiled and asked Johnee to do it again. When Johnee tried to hit him...Tyson just

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Def Dave in SC]

Head butted johnees fist. Hos wrist shattered and his dirty, dirty had fell to the ground.

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/```def.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
Much Love to my Homie dcpete

UCF:AYBABTU

[reeshy]

Now Wadd had no dink and no hand to pretend he was jerking said dink. He was a shell of his former self. He looked Tyson in the eye and...

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:vAT5eb31tzMC:www.rp-online.de/news/bilder/bildershows/bilder2002-0909/bilder2002-0909/lewis.jpg>

[mikeyboy]

"kill me. Please, kill me." Tyson laughed and kicked johnee in the neck. He laughed and said to johnee...

<IMG SRC="http://www.angelfire.com/film/mikeyboy/sig11.jpg">

I am an American aquarium drinker

Every Board needs a Chairman

[Heavy]

"Johnee, you know this is just another Resshy dream youre in right?"

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Def Dave in SC]

"Why would I kill my favwit bitch? That would be ludimacrith. I'm gonna hold on to you and snuggle with you and occasionally rape you."

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/```def.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
Much Love to my Homie dcpete

UCF:AYBABTU

[Heavy]

"Because this is Reeshys dream, his fantasy, and thats what he likes to see. At his age its difficult to get it up without thining of a black mans hard dick. Hes probaly humping the bed thinking of us right now"

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[mikeyboy]

Johnee's dream logic confused Tyson a bit, but not for long. "You can't fool me. This ain't no dream" and he punched johnee in the back of the head.

<IMG SRC="http://www.angelfire.com/film/mikeyboy/sig11.jpg">

I am an American aquarium drinker

Every Board needs a Chairman

[reeshy]

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:vAT5eb31tzMC:www.rp-online.de/news/bilder/bildershows/bilder2002-0909/bilder2002-0909/lewis.jpg>


Johnee went down like a ton of bricks but you had to hand it to him- he got back up and drew his samurai sword, looked Tyson in the eye and...



This message was edited by reeshy on 5-19-03 @ 7:08 PM

[AppleBoy]

Begged Mike for another one. Mike obliged. Finally, johnee had gotten the donkey punch he had longed for. Johnee basked in the afterglow as Tyson's love juice flowed out of his distended anus. Iron Mike wasn't finished though....

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

This message was edited by powerdump5000 on 5-19-03 @ 7:10 PM

[Def Dave in SC]

Mike then beagn to grope and beat johnee's sister. This filled johnee with a jealosy he hadn't felt before. So, johnee walked right up to Mike and said...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/```def.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
Much Love to my Homie dcpete

UCF:AYBABTU

[Tall_James]

"Do you want cheese with that?" and squatted his oozing, syphillitic rectum over the former heavyweight champ's....

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Def Dave in SC]

...fist. Mike had begun punching johnee just as he started his squat.

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/```def.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
Much Love to my Homie dcpete

UCF:AYBABTU

[AppleBoy]

"Hey johnee" said Mike "do you really think people will believe that picture of you holding the club and the fish is reeshy? I can't believe you kept that club out of your ass long enough to pose for that picture. By the way, what happened to the pineapple that I just bought?"

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

This message was edited by powerdump5000 on 5-19-03 @ 8:18 PM

[Death Metal Moe]

Suddenly, Doc from Back to the Future appeared in a Firey Delorian tire trail.


"Johnee! You have to come with me right now! The fate of the Homosexual world rides on your shoulders. Well, actually it rides a little lower, but you MUST come with me now!"

Johnee dropped everything and climbed in the car. Doc set the controls and as quickly as the car appeared, it was gone. It suddenly appeared in.......

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Def Dave in SC]

Inside the nads of Patient 0. Yes, the gay flight attendant who brought AIDS out of Africa and in to gay assholes. Johnee felt a strong voice inside him yell, "HOME!"

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/```def.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
Much Love to my Homie dcpete

UCF:AYBABTU

[AppleBoy]

It was a fitting destination for johnee, seeing as how he named himself after an AIDS patient.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Tall_James]

Johnee then turned to Doc Brown and shouted..."Set the Delorean for October 2, 1985 and get me to Hollywood!!!!" Doc Brown asked why and Johnee responded "that's the day Rock Hudson died and I love to get a final sip off that d!"

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[reeshy]

When they finally arrived, they were too late. Rock had already passed away. The Dr. told Wadd that Rock died of Botulism. Wadd said "Botulism???" incredulously. The doc said 'Yup-Botulism-bad meat in the can". Wadd went nuts and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Def Dave in SC]

Sucked Rock's legendary dick. Luck for johnee, rigor mortis had set in and the dick was hard all day."Great," exclaimed johnee. Now he had an all-day sucker.

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[AppleBoy]

johnee then squatted down on Rock's member for some backdoor excitement but it was no use. After years of using his ass as public storage, it was like putting a grain of rice through a hula hoop.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[reeshy]

When Wadd realized that this wasn't going to work, he began to cry and begged Doc to take him back to March 11, 1988. Doc asked him what that date was and Wadd told him it was the day before his Hero of Heroes died. Wadd said " I got to meet my namesake- I GOT TO MEET THE REAL JOHNNY WADD"

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Def Dave in SC]

Johnee walked up to the real Johny. With his last bit of strength, Wadd sent an infected batch into johnee's face. "Don't you gay-up my reputation, faggot!" As johnee slurped down the ninja splooge...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Death Metal Moe]

He gently rubbed the area where his dick used to be, and felt something for the 1st time in years! He felt a little bump! Was this his cock finally growing back?!

Shit, just an ingrown hair.

This was the last straw. Johnee knew he had to end his sham of a life. So h walked out o the room and.......

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Def Dave in SC]

found a leprachaun. The leprachaun said...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Death Metal Moe]

"MOTHER McCREE! You're the gayest man I've ever se eyes on! Saints be Praised!"

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Tall_James]

Then the Leprechaun bent Johnnee over and filled his fudgehole with orange stars, yellow moons and green clovers. Johnee screamed "YOU FOUND MY LUCKY CHARMS!!!"

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[reeshy]

Meanwhile the real Johnny Wadd called his good friend Ron Jeremy and told him to hurry over to see the little freak. Ron showed up with a whole can of crisco dumped on his johnson. Little Wadd looked up and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Def Dave in SC]

Then all of a sudden, a gang of children ran up. "Luck Charms!" They yelled. The children raced up into johnees cavernous anal cavity in the hopes of getting just a taste of the sweet sweet cereal. But unbeknownst to the children, they would never return because...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Heavy]

The story ended out of nowhere!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Death Metal Moe]

Chapter 3

As the coast guard sent another cutter into the high tide in Johnee's ass, they began to wonder if it was worth losing a 4th ship in the vast ocean of shit, cum and pinapple juice that was Wadd's ass. So they pulled the search party back and left the children to die.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[DeltaPin]

To this day a large monument is stuck in Johnee's ass in memory of the lost children. Then each year on the anniversary of their demise a huge celebration is held where...

<img src=http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ktk7439/files/potch.JPG>

[mikeyboy]

johnee became known as the wadd who killed
Christmas, because he trapped all of the town's
children in his ass on December 25th. As johnee
watched the parents of the town cry, he smiled, but
then he could hear the songs of the children,
celebrating Christma in his ass. He realized, that even
a syphalitic dirtbag like himself could not stop
Chritsmas. It was that day that johnee's prostate
grew three sizes. As he smiled from ear to ear, he
thought...


<IMG SRC="http://www.angelfire.com/film/mikeyboy/sig11.jpg">

I am an American aquarium drinker

Every Board needs a Chairman

[Death Metal Moe]

With a prostate THIS big, I can cum GALLONS at a time! I'm off to San Fransisco.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Heavy]

He got on a plane...........and it crashed! Nobody can survive a plane crash! Yes flight 109 from japan to San Fran CRASHED AND BURNED and everyone aboard died!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Heavy]

http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:cf0bjvqgh_cC:www.davethewave.co.uk/mary-mungo-midge/big-jpg/the%2520end.jpg

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

This message was edited by johneewadd on 5-21-03 @ 4:55 AM

[reeshy]

The plane crashed on Wake island amid nothing but sand and rock. Nothing stirred except for...wait....what's that? A little gnarled, diseases gnome crawled out of the wreckage holding onto dildo and very used enema bag and it was dressed in a bright red kimona. YES...it was...yes, JOHNNEEEE WADD had survived!! Oh what cruelty the world is capable of!!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[AppleBoy]

As johnee staggered along the beach wondering if there was any life on the island, off in the distance he saw a fat man in a captain's hat and a tall skinny man in a red shirt and a bucket hat. It was the Skipper and Gilligan, who had gone out on another three hour tour and had gotten lost yet again.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Heavy]

He climbed to the top of the tallest rock to see the best passage to reach the castaways. After plotting his course he became dizzy and looses his balance .......oh no! the Wadd falls backwards 100's of feet onto a large rock, breaking his head wide open. Blood was everywhere and Wadds skull actually opened wide up. he then slid into the water and sharks ripped him to pieces, in fact about 12 or more sharks ate from Wadd, leaving nothing undigested!

THE END!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Def Dave in SC]

It's a good thing the Skipper told johnee to rest his AIDS-stricken body. Had he not sent Gilligan up there, his new lover could have perished. Now the Skipper was finally happ, Gilligan was gone and he had a new hole to stick his dick into.

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[RageCage]

Off in the distance, Wadd saw a ship headed toward him. As the ship neared his cum- soaked eyes, Wadd saw that this wasn't any ordinary ship, it was the tour ship of the Harlem Globe Trotters! As the Globe Trotters reached the island, they saw Wadd and shouted,


<IMG SRC="http://www.imagestation.com/picture/sraid62/p29e1729939604daf8451af5670cb9984/fc1bdf58.jpg"width=300height=100>
Kool and the mother fuckin gang.

UCF:AYBABTU

[Def Dave in SC]

"Shiiiiit, I thought we got ridda that nigga years ago!" The team began to move towards wadd when Meadowlark Lemon screamed...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Violent Jay]

oh no mista bill. he ran away untill he got caught by the evil todd evf. then they all skipped of into the...

http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/violentjay1.gif
R.I.P Giligan and Skipper

[Violent Jay]

Ok here it is the whole story for you its really long and it took a long time so have fun.



One day in midtown Manhatten, Johnee went to 4th grade to learn how to spell Manhattan. There he checked his e-mail and found that he had been put on extended vacation for starting inane threads. While on vacation he met a girl. She was a lesbian one-legged devil-woshipper with a terrible overbite. Johnnee knew right away that she was out of his league. Ok then in a different part of the city a guy named Steve was returning home from work when he saw Johneewadd sulking because he was all alone. He went over to Johnny and said Stop blowing my dog!!! And as he put the blowdryer down his pants ripped and his cock fell out so he went to buy new pants. When the 2 women across the street saw this, one said to the other, "Was that a man or a woman-I couldn't tell". The other woman started to vomit, while her friend cried, "was that an innie?!" And then those same 2 women across the street were mysteriously hit from behind by what they thought was a telephone pole. when they looked up they saw a telephone pole. and a pathetic crying man in the fetal position behind it. who turned out to be johneewadd. But while wallowing in his own patheticness, johneewadd failed to realize that a squirell had stolen his penis because it was only the size of an acorn to begin with. After the squirrel ate the penis his nuts fell off. But they too were too small to see Johneewad wasn't sure if he lost his penis since it had been so long since he had used it!! so he asked a little old lady standing next to him if she needed help crossing the street but she said " Bug off, Dildo" and kicked him in the crotch. Johneewad just laughed in her face because he had no balls. With this, the old lady hauled off and as she walked away she turned and said "hey, one sentence at a time" She followed that by reminding everyone on the street that the world doesnt revolve around johneewadd and his dick. He died shortly after, never to return to the story again. On his way to hell, Johnee cried on the shoulder of a passing demon because the truth of his pathetic tool
had been shouted to the world. People tell their children the ancient story of Johneewad and the children laugh and clap their hands in glee. But Johnee still sits in hell And now back to Steve, who now sits in burger King eating lunch who said, "I can't stop thinking about poor, dead, castrated Johnee rotting in hell. I'll bet he's thinking right now that steve was always a good friend to me. But then steve noticed the time and realized he was running late. He ran out the door and waved down a cab, never thinking of Wadd again. As he approached the cab, he slipped on a banana peel and fell into a manhole. While in the manhole, he saw two rats making love. This got him thinking about what really went on behind the scenes during the Muppet movies. Then he looked closely at one of the rats and much to his suprise found that the rat was wearing Wadd's penis like a pendant. As Wadd reached down to retrieve his penis couldnt possibly post twice without bringing it back to wadd huh? Steve said to himself,"Damn, I want to forget about Wadd but I know I shan't ever get him out of my mind"!!!!!! With that he went home and prayed to baby jesus: he asked baby Jesus to make sure that the Devil flopeed his gigantic penis in johneewadd's face over and over again. Meanwhile, back in Hell, the imprint of the Devil's dong on Johnewadd's face grew redder And johneewadd couldn't be happier. "Maybe this is really Heaven," thought johnee. And then johneewadd's mom sucked her own dick...................and kept the change. Johnee sits in a corner in Hell saying to himself. " But I really did have a dick, I really did" Meenwhile back on Earth, nobody cared. she was about to confront him but at that very moment, 2 small imps rolled Johnee over and stuck a pineapple up his ass she was about to confront him but at that very moment, 2 small imps rolled Johnee over and stuck a pineapple up his ass And when it that was brought to lig

[Def Dave in SC]

Meadowlark Lemon screamed, "Dogpile!!" And as the team began to pile onto johnee, they disapeared. I turns out they all got lost in his enourmous, gaping asshole. The Globetrotters survived for weeks on pineapple, but they knew they had to escape. The only way the Globetrotters could get out was...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

This message was edited by Def Dave in DC on 5-21-03 @ 7:24 PM

[Heavy]

Do you know how to continue a sentence you fucking retard? Youve been fucking up the story the whole time.

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Death Metal Moe]

Yea, but that bit he just wrote where the Globetrotters fell in your cavernous asshole and fed off pinapples you places there for sexual gratification was worth it!

I just have to break the cycle once to say that THIS is without a doubt the ONLY THING that keeps me coming in the game room now! It is AWESOME! And I think it's hysterical that we have Johneewadd trying to kill himself off in his own story thread just to avoid any further humiliation!

Now then,

The globetrotters used the the bones of some children they found to tie a make shift ladder together to escape the Wadd's monstrous poop chute. Just as they got their hands to the top of his butt cheeks.........

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[reeshy]

Wadd ripped the world's most deadly, foul and malodorous fart that man had ever known. The diseases that were in the air made anthrax and SARS look like harmless perfume. The Globetrotters all except Meadowlark succumbed to the noxious cloud. Meadowlark looked around and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[reeshy]

This message was edited by reeshy on 5-21-03 @ 9:41 PM

[Heavy]

No no Reeshy, say it!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Def Dave in SC]

So Reeshy told him. "God sent me down to give you this message: 'Ye shall not have the power to stop your own life, that is up to me. the only way to be saved is to...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Tall_James]

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

This message was edited by Tall_James on 5-21-03 @ 9:56 PM

[Tall_James]

...is to accept your fate. Meadowlark heard this and popped out of Johnees' shitter like a misshapen brown turd. He smelled of pineapples and assfunk. He turned to Johnee and..

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Heavy]

Shot him in the face, killing him instantly!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Tall_James]

Or so he thought. Wadd had a hole in the back of his mouth from where years of man-junk had slammed against it. The bullet passed harmlessly through and hit a passing howler monkey in the arm. The monkey turned to Johnee and

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

This message was edited by Tall_James on 5-21-03 @ 10:01 PM

[Heavy]

ripped his heart out, killing him instantly!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Tall_James]

Johnee was shocked. Why would a monkey tear out its own heart? Oh well, he turned and saw that Meadowlark had turned the gun on himself to put himself out of his own misery. Johnee cried "Everyone I love kills themselves! I need to hear showtunes!"

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Def Dave in SC]

So god put him instantly in an off, off, off, off Broadway production of "Spunk!". It is the story of...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Tall_James]

a retarded sea-captain who dreams of sailing a sea of man-juice. he wears a jaunty beret and has a pet monkey named "Scabby". The highlight of the musical is when the captain sings...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Heavy]

a hetrosexual man named johneewadd


Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Heavy]

And he kills himself in it, but wait, by some tragic accident real bullets found its way into the gun....Johnee shots himself in the gut, killing himself instantly

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Tall_James]

a hetrosexual man named johneewadd...And he kills himself in it, but wait, by some tragic accident real bullets found its way into the gun....Johnee shots himself in the gut, killing himself instantly
And the critics call this the worst lyrics for a Musical ever written.

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

This message was edited by Tall_James on 5-21-03 @ 10:15 PM

[Heavy]

Shortly after the bad reviews came out, they layed Johnee to rest. Buried and dead. Buried in Concrete

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Immigration Dude]

which is just gay slang for a jizz bath. In fact wadd was back home in his gay shag-pad in sanfransico...

<IMG SRC= http://f1.grp.yahoofs.com/v1/UGi9PobK7FpMveyBd9WBB8yYOQk9LQV907GwvEXaVttxDe8Peg c_UYgeqOwOjdzj1wUr6VDKW_4_ZFGA/newsig.bmp >
"There's nothing better than a three beer buz, and firing a sawed off shotgun at a beat up tractor".

[Tall_James]

beaten with a dog's dink and shipped off to Jim Nabor's house. Gomer Pyle himself opened his door...


<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

This message was edited by Tall_James on 5-21-03 @ 10:23 PM

[reeshy]

Shortly after the bad reviews came out, they layed Johnee to rest. Buried and dead. Buried in Concrete


When the critics saw this title for the musical, they demanded that the showbe closed immediately and insisted that the writer be...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[grlNIN]

....he kicked his penny-loafers off and spread out across the bear skin rug in front of a roaring fire. The soft, fur felt insatiablt to him adn only deepened his desire for a good drilling of the ass. he flipped through his roledex and right in between the numbers for his Manicurist and Tanning salon he found Gary's number......

<font size=3><marquee behavior alternate><font color=purple>It's your big mouth and it's getting on my nerves you know I wish you'd just shut it up. </font></marquee></font><center>
<IMG SRC=http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=ariam21></center>

<font color=black><center>And if you don't agree with me, fuck you too, cause you forced-happy motherfuckers make me just as sick.-FTL
</center> </font>

[reeshy]

and said "Goooollllllllly, Mr. Wadd, I heard that you're available. After all, Johnny Mathis is just a dried up old man and doesn't turn me on anymore- but you, you little cutie...


(you guys keep stepping on my lines!!!)

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef




This message was edited by reeshy on 5-21-03 @ 10:25 PM

[Def Dave in SC]

But he didn't die, for God had already told him that he would not be able to die unless God himself let him. Unfortunately for johnee, God had decided that johnee would live for at least 2 or 3 more pages, no matter what happens.

Suddenly, Reeshy came down bering another holy message...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Heavy]

are hot. He then hit Wadd in the haed with a bat and killed him instantly!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Immigration Dude]

are hot. He then hit Wadd in the haed with a bat and killed him instantly!



You stupid DOUCHE! It hasnt worked yet. Try another way.

<IMG SRC= http://f1.grp.yahoofs.com/v1/UGi9PobK7FpMveyBd9WBB8yYOQk9LQV907GwvEXaVttxDe8Peg c_UYgeqOwOjdzj1wUr6VDKW_4_ZFGA/newsig.bmp >
"There's nothing better than a three beer buz, and firing a sawed off shotgun at a beat up tractor".

[reeshy]

Johnneee kept having these dreams about dying since he was very ashamed of the way he has lived his life. He knew that he was a slimy, disgusting little cat turd that did deserve to die but as stated before, God said no-so there!!!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Heavy]

But then God changed his mind and the Almighty struck Wadd dead himself!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Def Dave in SC]

Suddenly, the voice of God boomed, "Remember this, you assbag?

God had decided that johnee would live for at least 2 or 3 more pages, no matter what happens.


This means that you cant die until the 14 or 15 page, but even after that, you ost likely wont die!"

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Death Metal Moe]

It was at that moment that everyone realized Johnee prayed to an old Dildo he drew a white beard on and called God because it made him feel so good. So this GOD he talked about was just a plastic toy.

As he was muttering to his divine dildo, some horribly decomposed human remains fell out of his asshole right in front of a Police cruiser. They had no choice but to actually touch him and arrest him. Truly America's FINEST! They deserve a big bonus, or at least a free AIDS test after toughing that scrounge.

While in jail...........

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Tall_James]

...Johnee killed some time by blowing the guards, the DA and some guy delivering a pizza. All of the sudden, Johnee saw a bright light through the bars of his cell...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%



This message was edited by Tall_James on 5-21-03 @ 10:40 PM

[reeshy]

About this time, a comet passed close to the earth changing the space-time continuum. Wadd found himself in Ancient Rome. Not only that , He found himself standing on a large stage being sold as a slave.

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Def Dave in SC]

He was sold as a beast of burden, for he could carry 30x his own weight within his asshole. Unfortunately, the AIDS had withered him down to only about 38 lbs. This caused his price to drop to only...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Tall_James]

to an even trade for a 3 legged dog. Johnee thought that the dog was a cutie and tried to grab its junk. The dog turned on him and...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Heavy]

Bit Wadds face off, causing him to bleed to death instantly!

This means that you cant die until the 14 or 15 page


I said God changed his mind, pay attention stupid

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Heavy]

Hey btw this is page 14 you fucking retard

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[mikeyboy]

God chuckled. "Go along, you little scamp. I'm not
done with you yet."




This message was edited by mikeyboy on 5-22-03 @ 12:59 AM

[Death Metal Moe]

A scientist suddenly appeared and took the brain of Wadd. He returned to his volcano hideaway and implanted it into a robot!

He turned the robot on and set it loose on Greenwich Village! No man ass is safe!

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[reeshy]

The robot was equipped with everything that Wadd didn't have in his mortal body-good looks, strength, charm and yes...yes...a nuclear powered dink!! Wadd had died and gone to heaven!!! Now he could roam at will about Greenwich Village and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Heavy]

had a great amount of hetrosexual intercourse!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

This message was edited by johneewadd on 5-22-03 @ 8:06 AM

[reeshy]

As you can see, Wadd has the occasional lapse of dementia thinking he is straight!! Modern science can't fix everything!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Tall_James]

While collecting semen samples from the Gay Men's Choral Society, something horrible happened. Wadd's new robotic dink started smoking and throwing off sparks! Oh dear! What to do! Unfortunatly for Wadd, the Choral Society's baritone tried to put out the fire by throwing a Cosmopolitan on the now flaming metal member. This shorted out Johnee's robot body and ...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Def Dave in SC]

in order to stay functioal, the robot got rid of the dink. Now the robot could function as normal, only it could no longer perform its dink-related missions...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[FUNKMAN]

the spirit of Wadd came down from heaven... he knelt down before the robot and began to

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[Heavy]

go back up to heaven immediatly

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

This message was edited by johneewadd on 5-22-03 @ 9:43 AM

[Def Dave in SC]

But God wouldn't let him back in. It was a mistake that he was there in the first place. Heaven is no place for a syphillitic, gay AIDS patient. God reinstated johnee back on Earth with his original body (the one missing the penis and hand). And as johnee was walking down the street, an abviously gay man accosted him. He said...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Tall_James]

...but not before an Indian shaman from Greenwich Village preformed a mystical rite, bonding the soul of Wadd to the robotic Wadd forever! The Indian, whose young son had been sodomized by Wadd earlier in the story, said.....

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Violent Jay]

i will take you to the alley behind this building there will be many other men there and they will all run after you with long polls and...

http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/violentjay1.gif
R.I.P Giligan and Skipper

[Def Dave in SC]

and chase after you. But not very far, the y are week from the chemo therapy. Your nuclear dink has given nearly every gay man on the planet cancer!" Now johnee was truly alone, he has a gaping anal cavity, and soon there will be no one to stick anything in it...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Tall_James]

..but Johnee had an idea. "Hey - I could fuck chimps!" And then he trotted off to the zoo.

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[reeshy]

As Wadd was stumbling towards the chimp cage in the Bronx Zoo, the head chimp saw him coming. Although monkeys are known for their occasional reach-arounds and infamous public jerk-offs, they are essentially a heterosexual animal. They also heard of Wadd's reputation through the grapevine. They starting flinging chimp shit at Wadd and Wadd...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Def Dave in SC]

...and he gobbled it down with a ferocity not seen before on this Earth. Seeing this, the zoomaster promptly...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Tall_James]

...took a dump on the floor to see if Johnee would eat that too. Surprisingly...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Def Dave in SC]

johnee passed. He didn't want all the chmeical preservatives that went with Human fecal matter. Johnee felt his body was a temple, and he only wanted natural substances to enter, so he stuck to the monkey shit.

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Tall_James]

...and while he had his tongue up Cheetah's ass, scraping out the last of his chocolately goodness he accidently ate an undigested peanut. Johnee was very allergic to peanuts (not to penis though) and had a violent reaction...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Death Metal Moe]

Or, did the monkey shit stick to HIM?

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[reeshy]

Not only did the monkey shit stick to him, he had an unusual adverse reaction to the shit. He felt a stirring between his legs!!!! He put his hand down there and found...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Immigration Dude]

his old boyfriend Mike Tyson sippin his D. "Oh...

<IMG SRC= http://f1.grp.yahoofs.com/v1/UGi9PobK7FpMveyBd9WBB8yYOQk9LQV907GwvEXaVttxDe8Peg c_UYgeqOwOjdzj1wUr6VDKW_4_ZFGA/newsig.bmp >
"There's nothing better than a three beer buz, and firing a sawed off shotgun at a beat up tractor".

[Def Dave in SC]

...man-gina re-opening. "Another dick-hole," he yelled...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[AppleBoy]

"Plus I can finally get all the hot lesbo action from Billie Jean King and the Chinese women's hockey team that I've always wanted", sqealed a delighted Wadd.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Violent Jay]

he was also very surprised that so many peopl had come to go into....

http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/violentjay1.gif
R.I.P Giligan and Skipper

[Heavy]

This isnt making sense anymore. Striaghten up your act guys

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Tall_James]

This isnt making sense anymore. Striaghten up your act guys
Agreed.

So Johnee returned to tossing salads behind the dumpster of the Abortion Clinic in Clifton, NJ. He survived on the protein from the jizz and occasionally eating a fetus that he would find tossed out back. Johnnee often wished that he too could get pregnant and abort a child. Just at that moment, the magical Blue Fairy appeared and...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Immigration Dude]

impregnated him with the seed of Satan.

<IMG SRC= http://f1.grp.yahoofs.com/v1/UGi9PobK7FpMveyBd9WBB8yYOQk9LQV907GwvEXaVttxDe8Peg c_UYgeqOwOjdzj1wUr6VDKW_4_ZFGA/newsig.bmp >
"There's nothing better than a three beer buz, and firing a sawed off shotgun at a beat up tractor".

[Tall_James]

Johnee cried "Oh Joy! I can have a baby shower!" He invited all of the important people in his life...Mike Tyson, the monkeys from the zoo..

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Heavy]

and we cant forget Gilligan and skipper...

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[reeshy]

Yes, of course, Gilligan and the Skipper showed up with bells on. So did that poor little Indian guy and well-look who's here-Steve!!!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[AppleBoy]

The squirrel that stole his dink was there as well as the CEO of the Dole Pineapple Company.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Tall_James]

and Hassam the purse snatcher, Doc Brown and the Japanese JohnneeWadd came through the door as well. Why look who else came by....

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[AppleBoy]

Charles Nelson Reilly, Jim Nabors, Boy George, Paul Lynde, Richard Simmons, JM J. Bullock and Greg Louganis all were there. Elton John and Harvey Fierstein entertained the crowd as the scent of hairy man ass wafted through the air.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Death Metal Moe]

It was a beautiful party. They had whine spritzers, plenty of banannas, an a HUGE cake that had a male stripper inside! What a filling!
And he was just that, filling..........ewwwww.

As the night came to an end, Johnee began to consider the obstacles his child would face being the child of a known freak.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Tall_James]

He came up with an idea. He asked each of his 400 gay party guests to punch him as hard as they could in his stomach.

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[reeshy]

After all the guests had a shot at Wadd's protruding stomach, The fetus was still alive. I mean, after all, Wadd had no womb- the fetus was an asshole baby and therefore was protected from the pummeling!!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[AppleBoy]

Soon, wadd felt contractions. The spacing between them became shorter and shorter. He was about to give birth!

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Death Metal Moe]

He sat on the bowl and shat out the child! It's a boy! Finally! Johnee felt like had had acomplished something! He had created life!

At that moment, he suddenly realized he FLUSHED THE TOILET! NOOOOOOOO!

He looked back just in time to see his bung hole baby spin away to a coll blue watery grave.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[reeshy]

All was not lost. The baby, who wanted to be called Elvis, cried out his relief of escaping what was probably the worst life for a baby. Being that he was a freak of nature anyway, he was born with gills. He swam through through the sewers till...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef




This message was edited by reeshy on 5-23-03 @ 7:51 PM

[Def Dave in SC]

..he came across two squirrells having sex.

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Heavy]

Dave,
Are you really that stupid? Do you understand the concept of building off of something? You repeadedly take a sentence or paragraph headed in a certain direction and kill it by saying something totally unrelated and lame. Get your fucking act together before I ban you from this thread you fucking moron.

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Tall_James]

Get your fucking act together before I ban you from this thread you fucking moron.

Hah! That is the funniest thing I have heard all day. You...ban someone from this thread? Please. Here, have another pineapple.

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Def Dave in SC]

Get your fucking act together before I ban you from this thread you fucking moron.


Who else feels I am doing this thread a disservice by posting in it?

And since when has johnee had the power to ban members? And since when was it possible to ban members form specific threads?

I am sorry for breaking the flow of the story witht his post, but it had to be done.


Oh yeah, johnee what i did with that last post is called a "callback". It is a reference to an earlier post, meant to make the reader recall that joke.

Now let no further posts interrup the story. W'eve come this far, and we can't let it die now.

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

This message was edited by Def Dave in DC on 5-23-03 @ 9:53 PM

[reeshy]

Having seen the squirrels have sex, Elvis decided to ban them from the sewer. He threw pineapples at them till they ran away. The baby found an old joint sitting on a ledge in the sewer and ...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Def Dave in SC]

brought it home to mommy. Wadd instantly recognized it as his ancient, shriveled penis...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Heavy]

You...ban someone from this thread?

Tall james, I trust you realize that was sarcasm. You know I've been on the board for along time and of course I realize I cant ban anyone from a thread. ahem.

Oh yeah, johnee what i did with that last post is called a "callback". It is a reference to an earlier post, meant to make the reader recall that joke.


Get this amigo, callbacks are suppssed to be funny. You took a line that coulda went somewhere special and killed it. 2 squirells having sex isnt funny.
Think back, you have a newborn ass baby floating through a sewer and he sees something......What could it be? Squirells? huh? Oh I get it, a squirell was mentioned on page 2. Great. Nice job Deek. you couldve said" he saw that he was floating in Gallons apon gallons of cum that came out of Wadds ass when he shit out the baby" but no.....you choose to say that he saw 2 squirells.
This isnt the first time this has happened either. You have Tall James, Reeshy, and MOE serving up softballs throughout this whole thread and you continuosly bunt them foul. Try to turn it up a notch if atall possible.

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Def Dave in SC]

I'll admit it, that post was not even close to my funniest. They can't always be the best post ever. I took a chance and it didn't work as well as I'd hoped. Boo Hoo, I'm sorry I upset you so much that you had to derail the thread.


But to say that I've blown every "chance" I've had is rediculous. The only times I can remember causing the thread to make a left hand turn was after one of your posts.

When you post something about two women getting hit by what they thought was a telephone pole, I'm not gonna make you feel good and say that the "telephon pole" is really wadds penis. Thats not funny. I'm going to disrupt your plans and say that it was a telephone pole.

Its very reasonable to say I have messed up a couple posts in this story. When you have enough killer lines, a level of humor is expected in ALL your posts. But like I said, they can't all be the best ever.

But you wouldn't know about any of this. No one has any expectations for your posts.

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

This message was edited by Def Dave in DC on 5-24-03 @ 12:02 AM

[Heavy]

All anyone expects from your shitty lines is that it will not relate in anyway to the one before it.

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[reeshy]

With the mummified dink in hand, Elvis walked into the hospital room where his "mommy" was. Wadd was in the bed, strapped down, screaming over and over to some imaginary person named Dave about sabotaging trains or something. Elvis becamed afraid and ran down the hallway. As he did, he tripped and the petrified weiner sailed out of an open window and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[AppleBoy]

into the arms of a passing Mike Tyson who was on his way to visit johneewadd and congratulate him on the birth of his bung hole baby. "Aren't you the cutest little thing" said Mike as he....

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Johnny Fontane]

...took a bite off its ear.

[AppleBoy]

"Mmmm, pineapple with just a hint of man chowder. Tasty!", said Mike as put the little tyke down and made his way into the hospital.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Heavy]

and then punched it in the mouth.........(?)

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[reeshy]

Excuse me, Johneee. You have just disturbed the continuity of this epic saga. As you can see, Mike had left the little tyke on the sidewalk and had already walked away-My, my, pay more attention next time-ok, Bucky?

Now...Mike Tyson went into the hospital and went over to Wadd, kissed him on the cheek then punched him in the mouth. He said" you wittle twamp, Dat ain't ma kid, you mofo" Wadd then said"...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef






This message was edited by reeshy on 5-24-03 @ 12:58 PM

[Heavy]

You know damn well I got stepped on by Mr 5000

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[AppleBoy]

wadd said "I have needs. I was lonely. You were getting your ass beat by Lennox Lewis. What was I to do?" Tyson yelled...

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[reeshy]

"I don't give a damn, And who the fuck is this Mr.5000 you keep talking to in your sleep, you wittle bitch?"

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[Heavy]

with that Wad had enough. Left! right , left! Tyson is down! Johneewadd then throuws his hands up in the air like a true champion! But then, out of nowhere.....

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[reeshy]

Elvis came into the room being held by none other than John Wayne and behind him, Anita Bryant!! Wayne took one look at Wadd and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef




This message was edited by reeshy on 5-24-03 @ 3:59 PM

[AppleBoy]

said in disgust "What the hell's the matter with you, pilgrim? Don't you know ass babies need love too?" No sooner did those words leave his mouth when an enraged Anita Bryant began to....

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Def Dave in SC]

...shout, "No homo babies! Give this child a chance to be staright!" That being said, Elvis, Bryant and the Duke left with the ass-baby. Wadd and Iron Mike were now left to talk out their problems...

Abba Zabba, you my only friend
<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU

[Donnielimes]

Their discussion was long Iron Mike qouting mao tse tung in correctly and Johnneee distracting himself by flashing young catholic school girls on their way home from class but in the end they decided....

"Good Times/Noodle Salad, Thats my story"

[FUNKMAN]

get a tatto of each other's image on their buttocks using the bung for a left eye... they parted ways and it was off to

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[reeshy]

..the circus for little Wadd. He thought he could land a job as a trapeze artist that doesn't use his hands(remember he only has one) and no feet. He figures he can use a hook stuck up his ass with a 2X4 as an added attraction. He looked up the Circus Master and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef

[reeshy]

Fuck these double posts

<IMG SRC=http://www.osirusonline.com/sub/reeshy.jpg>
Thanks Reef




This message was edited by reeshy on 5-24-03 @ 7:30 PM

[DeltaPin]

He looked up the Circus Master and...


He fell from the trapeze since there's no way a 2X4 stuck up Johnee's ass could support anything after all the years of reaming. As he plummetted to sure death he kept thinking, "damn, should've used a 2x10."

Then to everyone's suprise Johnee was saved from death as his ass was impaled on two circus tent posts (some call them douvble posts) that the clowns held up to break his fall. Johnee was so elated he didn't know how he could repay the clowns for their great deed. So he...

<img src=http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ktk7439/files/potch.JPG>


This message was edited by DeltaPin on 5-25-03 @ 12:54 AM

[Heavy]

Stole a bike and rode off into the night! Miles from any civilavation by the time he stoped, he came across an abandoned shack and took it as his home. He lives off the land for 50 years, and then dropped dead one day. The End

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[reeshy]

One day in the future, Merlin was trying out some magic tricks. As he was walking through the woods, he came across some old bones. He wondered and pondered... ah, what the hell, he said to himself..Hocus Pocus Shazamm...POOF... there stood JOHNEEE WADD in the flesh. Merlin was amazed and he...

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>

[Heavy]

was thanked by Mr Wadd, who if he wasnt before, was without a doubt now %100 hetro with all body parts functioning and healthy and adequate in size.

http://www.findadeath.com/Decesed/h/John%20Holmes/portrait.jpg

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[AppleBoy]

All of johnee's parts were healthy, functioning and of proper size, even his junk....if he were a child. Yes, johneewadd was a full grown man who was hung like an infant, which was fine with him since he was a filthy kid toucher in the first place. Now he didn't have to go to the maternity ward anymore to get his thrills, he could just stay home. Plus, johnee still had a hankering to have pineaaples shoved up his ass.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[reeshy]

http://www.gvincxxx.com/rednail/images/items/37745.jpg


Just before Wadd left Merlin, Something fell out of his pocket. Merlin picked it up- IT was a gay porno that Wadd had been in years ago-there goes that rep of 100% hetero!!! Merlin looked at him and told him "Get thee away from me, you perdicious buggerer!!!!!" Wad ran crying into the the forest and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>





This message was edited by reeshy on 5-25-03 @ 9:32 AM

[reeshy]

This message was edited by reeshy on 5-25-03 @ 9:34 AM

[Heavy]

Boy you can really make things look different with photoshop these days huh?

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[AppleBoy]

Wad ran crying into the the forest and... realizing that Photoshop had nothing to do with his gay porn activities, looked for a porcupine to shove up his ass in order to console himself. Soon, wadd came upon a cool stream.


<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[reeshy]

Sitting at the stream, Wadd thought about what he could do next. Everything looked bleak. He thought "Maybe I Really should kill myself" He looked around for something to end his life with when an old newspaper floated by him. The headlines showed Clinton amd Monica on the front page. It hit Wad like a ten gallon bag of cum! He said to himself (talking to himself was more evidence of mental illness) " Johneee, my boy, with your reputation, there is no place to go except---Politics!!!!"

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>

[AppleBoy]

Thrilled beyond belief, johnee ran home as fast as he could to begin packing, singing "It's Raining Men" all the way. When he got home, he shoved his Village People CD's up his ass, put on his best polyester jumpsuit, hopped in his yellow Miata and headed for Washinton D.C. No local politics for johnee. He was starting right at the top!

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[FUNKMAN]

He ran straight for the Lincoln Memorial and tried blowing the statue but chipped his tooth.
He then looked up and there stood the Washington Monument, needless to say

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">



This message was edited by FUNKMAN on 5-25-03 @ 5:53 PM

[reeshy]

He wished he could do something unmentionable to himself with the monument. But alas, even Wadd has his limitations. So he walked over the Smithsonian Institute because he heard that they had an exhibition on...

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>

[FUNKMAN]

chipped tooth cocksuckers. There it was, his family tree. He began to shed a tear when Hillary Clinton strolled along, he and Hillary

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[reeshy]

Talked over a decaf double cappucino about Bill. Hillary sllipped and call her husband a "cocksucker" and Wadd's ears perked up. He wondered if he could get an interview with the ex-president and asked Hillary and she said "...

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>

[FUNKMAN]

he would have to apply for an intern position. it was the only way to find out what was in Bill's head(sort of speak). Wadd never learned to read or write so he hopped the train to

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">



This message was edited by FUNKMAN on 5-25-03 @ 8:25 PM

[Heavy]

Become a porn star

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Heavy]

But he hoped to keep the press out of it so he was going low key. Somehow he thought being a secret porn star would help him become president. But then......one Sunday morning on the front page of People Choice magazine!

http://w1.523.telia.com/~u52306129/seka2/THE%20PEOPLES%20CHOICE-%20Girls%20Who%20Love%20John%20Holmes.jpg

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Heavy]

And on the inside more damaging picturs!

http://www.1-classic-porn-star-ron-jeremy-jon-holmes-picture-gallery.com/images/john5.jpg

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[reeshy]

The next day, there was an expose done on those pictures. The two "Models" pictured were actually transvestites who lived with Wadd and did his every bidding!!

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>

[FUNKMAN]

Wadd was in his glory. Everynight he would do the YaYo and get a mayo facial... But one morning he awoke to find that

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">



This message was edited by FUNKMAN on 5-25-03 @ 9:50 PM

[reeshy]

This message was edited by reeshy on 5-25-03 @ 11:50 PM

[Heavy]

SAY IT!!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Death Metal Moe]

He awoke to find that his transvestites had tied him up, drugged him and robbed him blind.

His entire empire he had built as a porn star had come crashing down. He was poor again. With nothing but his underware, black socks and $5000 in gold bars he stuffed up his ass, he set out YET AGAIN on the dusty trail.

About 100 miles and a week later, Wadd began to notice something strange about the countryside he was walking through.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[reeshy]

People that he met were actually nice to him. Nobody was throwing bags of loose monkey shit at him like they did in the old days. Folks were offering him a place to stay overnight while ignoring his obvious plight and overt homosexuality. He finally asked one person what this was all about and he said, "...

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>

[AppleBoy]

"You're back in Than Franthithco, thilly! Now bend over and show us that big, beautiful brown eye of yourth."

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Death Metal Moe]

This Johnee did gladly.

As he was enjoying the sensation, he suddenly realized that a dump truck was pulling out of his rectum! The fags of San Fran had fooled him! They didn't want his butt love, they wanted the $5000 in gold bars in his pooper!

So now he was homless, gay, AND broke...AGAIN!!!! So it was back to blowjobs for quarters. At least he was in his Graceland for such work so to speak.

He figured he's better go get some mouthwash first, so he walk towards an open CVS. As he walked through the door.....

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=njdmmoe">
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Tall_James]

...he had a thought as to how to make back his fortune...since he was near Silicon Valley he'd use THE INTERNET!!! So Johnee set up a site to sell his videotaped exploits. (Be warned...NOT SAFE FOR WORK!!!)

http://www.adultdvdgold.com/gay_details.asp?item=9069&gcategory_id=19



<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%



This message was edited by Tall_James on 5-26-03 @ 6:21 PM

[reeshy]

Of course, that was a very, very real looking prosthesis that he was wearing on the cover of that tape. When the money starting pouring into his bank account from all the sales, he diecided to invest in a commune for others in the same dire straits as he found himself. So he looked for a real estate agent and met...

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>

[ADF]

...some guy named Jim Jones, Jr. Wadd and Jimmy hit it off great. It seems as if Mr. Jones had come up with a new flavor of koolaid.. fried chicken! Johnee was all set to invest with Jim Jones, Jr., but what he didn't know about the koolaid was...

<center><a href = "http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com"><img src = http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/adftron.gif title = "2%" width = 300 height = 100></a>
Do you know the way to San Jose?
</center>

[Death Metal Moe]

....it was actually watered down man goo. No wonder he couldn't stop drinking it!

So Johnee scheduled a sit down with Jim. He went in the room, sat down, and suddenly realized he had sat on Jim! GEEPERS! Now Jim was lost in the labyrinth that was Johneewadd's asshole.

He could hear him screaming for months, trying to find his way out, sustained only on a pack of cheese crackers he had in his pocket and pineapple chunks from the brown chasm.

So one day, Johneewadd flew down to Columbia to score some nose candy when...

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Tall_James]

Pablo Escobar himself asked Johnee if he'd like to be a "mule" to carry cocaine back to the states. Johnee misunderstand Pablo and thought he asked him to sip from his mule. Bad idea....

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%



This message was edited by Tall_James on 5-26-03 @ 8:42 PM

[AppleBoy]

because wadd gulped down Escobar's pole like an Ethiopian at an all you can eat buffet. Escobar couldn't pop his load as he was distracted by the echoes of a lost Jim Jones Jr. eminating from wadd's cavernous ass. This made johneewadd mad ....

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Tall_James]

so he looked up from Pablo's junk, about to give him a piece of his mind, when he saw a gun pointed at his head! Wadd panicked when the gun went off but due to the hole in the back of his throat caused by the repeated pounding of man-lumber, the bullet passed through....FOR THE SECOND TIME IN THIS STORY!!!

Pablo freaked and turned the gun on Johnee's ass and shot him. The bullet entered the brown cavern and killed Jim Jones when the bullet reached him about 8 minutes later.

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[reeshy]

Wadd ain't no fool so he hotfooted into the jungles of Columbia where he fell off a cliff and into a raging river. All was lost until an indian in a canoe happened by and scooped our "hero" out of the drink. He took him back to his village where the chief wanted to give him a tattoo of a....

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:G_Rb4BBzqkUC:www.kisn971.com/photos/images/witch_doctor/01.jpg>





This message was edited by reeshy on 5-26-03 @ 9:41 PM

[Heavy]

I have nothign to add except to say you guys are on a roll and doing great, the story really seems to be moving along smoothly without a certain somebody putting the brakes on every other post. Keep it up!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Tall_James]

I have nothign to add
THEN STOP RUINING THE FLOW OF THE STORY!!!

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Death Metal Moe]

"Caution:Open Manhole" on Wadd's ass, but he didn't have enough ink to make it the 40 feet it would need to span the top of his asshole.

Instead he put a wicked curse on Johnee. The effects of the curse were that everytime he had manjunk in his face........

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Heavy]

THEN STOP RUINING THE FLOW OF THE STORY

I have to check in every so often

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Death Metal Moe]

I have to check in every so often


Yea, to Cum Guzzlers Anonymous.

Back to the story! The CURSE!

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[AppleBoy]

The effects of the curse were that everytime he had manjunk in his face........ he politely said "No thanks. I'm trying to cut down." which was, of course, the furthest thing from the truth. This made johnee very sad. He desperately searched for a way to break the curse.


<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[reeshy]

So Wadd jumped on a tramp steamer (no-not a tramp) and sailed to New Orleans to find a certain woman trained in the arts of Voodoo. He had to have his mojo (teehee) changed. He found this woman on Bourbon St. but first he stopped in a bar to have a drink. A certain pirate we all know was sitting there drinking rum and said to Wadd "...

<IMG SRC=http://www.thestoreforcooks.com/Graphics/Chef%20photos/tojo.jpg>

[Death Metal Moe]

"Arrrr! My whole crew was killed by that giant squid. I need new seaman!"

Johnee squealed with delight at this request. He immediatly sat down and told the Captian how interested he was in Semen.

After the Captian was done vomiting, he agreed to employ Johnee as his new 1s mate. They were off in search of treasure!

So they set out for the docks. On the way......

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[reeshy]

The captain said he wanted to stop and get some bait. Wadd asked what was he fishing for and the captain said crabs. Wadd looked at the captain proudly and reached in his pants and pulled out a 6 pounder and tried to give it to the captain. The captain screamed a very unmanly like scream and pushed Wadd into the harbor. Just then, a shark happened to be swimming nearby and turned and sped towards Wadd. Wadd then...

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:mtXjmKVe5wcC:www.crawfishguy.com/images/crabs.jpg>







This message was edited by reeshy on 5-26-03 @ 11:41 PM

[SuperClerk]

challenged the shark to a game of "Connect Four". When the shark politely refused, Wadd reached in his pocket and pulled out a.......

<IMG SRC="http://home.attbi.com/~wwfallon/RFnetSuperClerk2.jpg">
We got a rockin' rhythm with a high tech sound
That'll make you move your body down to the ground.....

Fallon Rules!!!!


This message was edited by SuperClerk on 5-27-03 @ 3:01 AM

[Death Metal Moe]

...a can of Easy Cheese. He ate some for strength, and the sprayed the shark in the face! The shark, stunned by the preservitives and gases ran away like a little girly man.

Johnee swam to shore intent on kicking the sea captians ass. Of course when he got to him again, the sea captian just beat him like a red headed stepchild. Johnee is a pussy don't forget.

As he lay bleeding, cursed and dinkless on the dock.........

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[reeshy]

...he thought" maybe I can get a job as an entertainment director on that cruise ship over there-after all, I do know all the show tunes by heart". So Wadd scraped all the cash he had left and bought a beautiful gown, Red "fuck-me" satin spikes and a new wig and proudly marched up the gangplank of said ship. He went up to the pursor and told him he was applying for the job.

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:CF2VAcLaiZgC:www.ronniescotts.co.uk/ronnie_scotts/ronniescotts/130/gifs/watts.jpg>

[Tall_James]

To which the Pursor replied "This isn't a cruise ship you stupid fuck...it's a Garbage Scow!" Johnee, not missing a beat, replied "It still smells like a Love Boat to me!".

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[reeshy]

But the purser offered a job to Wadd anyway. He said"IF you really need a job that bad, You can be the chief superintendent in charge of sorting garbage." Wadd said"Shit yea- I'm great at that!!" So he started work. After about 3 hours, he had seperated all the used condoms from the rest of the filth but had decided that he was going to keep all of them for himself.

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:CF2VAcLaiZgC:www.ronniescotts.co.uk/ronnie_scotts/ronniescotts/130/gifs/watts.jpg>

[AppleBoy]

Johnee took all the used condoms and fashioned them into a lovely tiara. He then went poolside and began singing that old Ruppert Holmes song "If you like penis coladas, getting caught in the rain....". The passengers had seen enough. "We're on a cruise to get away from fucking degenerates like you", they cried. The angry mob then rushed johnee and ....

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Heavy]

Asked him for his autograph!!! They loved the Wadd! And then....

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[AppleBoy]

wadd came back to his senses. The smell of crusty man goo had made him believe he was on a cruise ship. The pool was really the toilet and the passengers were really the crew lining up for rim jobs. The only thing that was true was the fact that they loved johneewadd.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Def Dave in SC]

Well, not johneewadd per se...what they really loved were toothless blowjobs and his asshole that was "open" to penetration by any object.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU
We got more fruitier loops than that Tucan Sam bitch

[reeshy]

Again, Wadd came out on top. He charged everybody a quarter per BJ and netted 1600 dollars. He was a rich bitch. All for an afternoon's work. He went to the fantail to have a man-goo martini and catch some rays. The captain came down to him and told him "...

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:CF2VAcLaiZgC:www.ronniescotts.co.uk/ronnie_scotts/ronniescotts/130/gifs/watts.jpg>

[Death Metal Moe]

...It's time I told you my terrible secret, seeing as we've known each other for all of this afternoon. I'm really a woman.

With that Johnee vomited and jumped in on a crude raft he had fashioned out of used tooth brushes and empty enemas. Guess who emptied them!

He used his enormous buttplug as a paddle and got away from the woman. Fez had always taught him girls were ugly and stupid.

He set sail and used the stars to guide him. He called Sly Stalone and Jim Belushi for directions.

Their directions led him to......

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[AppleBoy]

Tom Cruise's secret island hideaway off the coast of Greece and all the hairy Greek man ass he could handle. Wadd was so overjoyed, he....

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[reeshy]

He...he...stopped in his tracks. He became overcome with grief and guilt. His whole sordid life came crashing down around him. He knew he had to change his ways or he would die. It wasn't too late. As he walked down the road, He saw a sign for the Clint Eastwood Rehabilitation Clinic for the Hopelessly Gay!! There was hope in the world. He ran..no...he scrambled for the front door and entered. He ran to the front desk in dire desperation and...

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:CF2VAcLaiZgC:www.ronniescotts.co.uk/ronnie_scotts/ronniescotts/130/gifs/watts.jpg>

[Tall_James]

...and he found himself staring into the dreamiest blue eyes that he had ever seen! His name was Lars and he worked the front desk. Johnee took one look at those eyes and fell madly in love. "This could be the one" he thought. Lars handed him a registration form and when he slid the paper across the table...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[reeshy]

Wadd said "No-NO-must... fight.... tempation!!" He ran screaming into the men's room to get away from beautiful hunk of a man. He knew that this was his last chance to be straight, to be happy, To BE NORMAL!!! He broke down and cried!!!

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:CF2VAcLaiZgC:www.ronniescotts.co.uk/ronnie_scotts/ronniescotts/130/gifs/watts.jpg>

[Death Metal Moe]

...Johnee noticed it was Lars from Metallica. St. Anger had sucked SO BAD that it ruined Metallica's entire career, so he got a day job helping fags get off Dick.

Johneewadd leaned over to him and said "I bet you have great stamina having toured the world as a drummer."

Lars leaned in and replied...

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Tall_James]

"Let me tell you a secret Johnee...Enter Sandman was not about nightmares...it was about our beautiful roadie "Sandman" and what the four of us did everynight after rehearsal!"

Johnee was shocked! He turned to Lars and said.."WOW! I knew you guys were hardcore!"

Lars just smiled and said.."I was a lot like you Johnee. As a matter of fact...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[reeshy]

...before I joined Metallica, I was a fluffer for the Village People. Night after night doing that friggin' Indian dude really got to me so I decided to change and become the leather wearing Macho man you see before you-and you know what Johneee? I can help you change-I really can. All you got to do is...

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:CF2VAcLaiZgC:www.ronniescotts.co.uk/ronnie_scotts/ronniescotts/130/gifs/watts.jpg>

[Heavy]

He knew he had to change his ways or he would die.

Yea, like theres a chance of that happening

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[Def Dave in SC]

...is bend over"

Johnee bent over and Lars jammed his head up johnees ass and pulled it down to just over his ears.

"I have a johnee hat!" Yelled Lars.

<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU
We got more fruitier loops than that Tucan Sam bitch

[Tall_James]

But to Lars' horror, while looking about the cavernous brown eye, he spotted the bullet-riddled body of Jim Jones - shot to death by Pablo Escobar and decomposing rapidly. Lars said to himself "No wonder the body went unnoticed for so long, the smell from this ass alone would knock a camel off a corpse wagon!"

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[Def Dave in SC]

But thats not all, while poking around, Lars made another shocking discovery...

<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU
We got more fruitier loops than that Tucan Sam bitch

[Death Metal Moe]

ATLANTIS!

The long lost civilization had FINALLY been rediscovered!

Lars quickly told Johnee he had a lost city in his colon. Johnee was stunned. He thought the movement he had always felt in there were just the scores of hampsters breeding.

Johnee's ass was now a piece of history! It would need to be explored and examined by professionals! As Lars went to go phone a local museum...

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[reeshy]

Johneee started jumping up and down in pure exctasy!! He was going to have a bunch of strangers rooting around his rectum in search of discoveries and treasure. But the action of jumping up and down caused a massive earthquake in Atlantis knocking all the buildings down and destroying all of the artifacts.

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:CF2VAcLaiZgC:www.ronniescotts.co.uk/ronnie_scotts/ronniescotts/130/gifs/watts.jpg>

[AppleBoy]

"Thanks for wrecking my city, douche bag", johnee heard someone yell. That someone was none other than Namor of Atlantis, Prince of the Deep.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[shamus mcfitzy]

He and HIS gay lover, Aquaman, promised that Johnee would feel their wrath. As punishment they......

{I think eventually this will become really unfunny, a limit should be set, maybe 666}


This message was edited by shamus mcfitzy on 5-29-03 @ 12:13 AM

[Tall_James]

..they relocated their entire population to the fishtanks at Petland Discounts and were never heard from again.

Johnee felt so much lighter after the Atlanteans left his ass. But he also felt emotionally empty. He didn't know what he would do with all of that additional space in his ass. He turned and asked Lars what he thought should be done. Lars thought for a second and came up with a brilliant idea for what to do with the cavernous expanses of Johnee's anal cavity....

"WOODSTOCK 2003!!!!!!"

Lars said that he could get a bunch of his gay musical cohorts to preform and they could probably fit about a quarter million people up Johnee's ass. Johnee thought the idea was fabulous! Lars started making some calls...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[AppleBoy]

Elton John and Boy George agreed to perform. They hadn't seen johnee since the baby shower and asked how the little tke was doing. Michael Jackson agreed to perfrom but only if the grand finale consisted of all the performers making a huge daisy chain on stage while singing 'Beat It'. Prince, Little Richard and Rod Stewart all signed on....

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Heavy]

The End!

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[reeshy]

Yes, all the artists agreed that they would all sing that Doors classic "The End" together since it symbolizes the path that all their lives are taking. Johnny called in Jim Nabors to give him singing lessons and Jim said"...

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:CM1FhMA1fPAC:film.tierranet.com/films/a.now/jhwayne.gif>

[Tall_James]

"SHAZAM!!!!" Johnee looked at Jim cock-eyed (which was ironic because he didn't have a cock) and thought "MY GOD! Jim Nabors is Captain Marvel!"

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[AppleBoy]

johnee paused for a moment and thought about how good Jim's package would look in that tight Captain Marvel outfit. He soon got back to the singing lessons. The Village Peole just signed up and he was looking forward to joining them in singing 'YMCA' and 'In the Navy'.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Tall_James]

Johnny Mathis, George Michael, Frankie Goes to Hollywood, Bronski Beat and Love & Rockets all replied in the positive...HIV positive that is.

Johnee got wood just thinking about it. And by wood that meant he picked up a 2 x4 and started deep throating it.

Jim Nabors started the singing lessons...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

the forgotten 98%

[AppleBoy]

when in walked the newest addition to the line up - The Metal God - Rob Halford - and shoved a bull whip up johnees ass.

"If I had a dick, then you'd have another thing cummin'," cooed johnee.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[reeshy]

As Wadd was trapsing across the stage doing his terrible impression of Alice Cooper, Who should be driving by on his way to the local golf course but Vinnie Furnier. He became incensed when he saw the spectacle of mockery before him. He stopped his Rolls and ran behind the stage where the gay fest was happening. He had a can of gasoline with him and splashed it all about and lit it. The stage went up since is was constructed with nothing but old, dry faggots (of wood) and all the entertainers started to...

<IMG SRC=http://images.google.com/images?q=tbn:4R6gZWBtLJYC:cooper.hobby.ru/images/face.jpg>





This message was edited by reeshy on 5-31-03 @ 4:05 PM

[mikeyboy]

It took the site being taken down to kill this thread, and even then it was only for a couple of days.

At this point, I'll be nice and give johnee a short break from the story to have a hearty meal of an overstuffed sandwich, and maybe some soup. Now back to the abuse...

<IMG SRC="http://www.angelfire.com/film/mikeyboy/sig12.jpg">

I am an American aquarium drinker

2%

This message was edited by mikeyboy on 6-2-03 @ 1:37 PM

[Death Metal Moe]

Break?

FUCK THE FUCKING HELL OUT OF THAT!!

and all the entertainers started to...


Sing "The roof! The roof! The roof is more flaming than us!"

since tape was rolling the whole time, a record executive took the raw recording in the studio and made a top 10 hit out of it! Little jerkoffs were requesting it up to #1 on TRL everyday!

Johnee had finally become a pop sensation! He was signed my Manhole records and went on an international tour, with 60 shows in San Fransisco.

At his very 1st show......

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Heavy]

a stalker with a sniper rifle ended johneewads carear right there on stage infront of everybody

Mad props to Fluff for the sig and C.O.soup for hosting!
<img src="http://publish.hometown.aol.com/canofsoup15/images/jwaddsig.gif">
138%

Yes, he is hung like a horse. One female porn star describes having sex with Johneewadd as like giving birth.

[reeshy]

The sniper had Wadd in his crosshairs-just as he pulled the trigger,he farted. The round was off by mere inches! It struck Wadd right in the bunghole!! Alas!!! Wadd was rushed off to the hospital where the ER doc took a look at his wounds and said. "...

<IMG SRC=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/reeshy.jpg>





This message was edited by reeshy on 6-3-03 @ 7:13 AM

[AppleBoy]

"Are you sure the bullet hit him in the brown eye? The only thing I saw up there were some pineapples, a Coast Guard cutter, a monument to some lost children and a sea of mule juice." No sooner had the doctor spoken, when...

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Def Dave in SC]

The inescapable gravity of his black hole of a browneye pulled him in...

<img src="http://members.aol.com/TheToddsterLSP/sigpics/defdaveindc1.gif">
Much Love to my Homies dcpete, Todd EVF, PanterA, and Tall_James

UCF:AYBABTU
We got more fruitier loops than that Tucan Sam bitch

This message was edited by Def Dave in DC on 6-3-03 @ 2:00 PM

[Tall_James]

But luckily for the doctor, he was prepared for this eventuality. Before examining the Wadd, he tied a Winnebago to his own back. Luckily the Winnedbago was just wide enough to prevent him from being lost for all eternity. However, the horrors of Johnee's sphincter scarred him forever, causing him to leave the medical profession because he felt the need to take 45 showers a day for the rest of his life.

Meanwhile, Johnnee was flown by Manhole Records to appear on TRL with Carson Daly to promote his newest single..."It's Raining ManJuice !"

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/boundries.jpg>

[AppleBoy]

The performance was spectacular. Two rows of Greenwich Village's finest cranked one out on johnee as he sang and danced between them. Busby Berkley, eat your heart out! After the performance, Carson...

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[Tall_James]

Carson said, "Hey Johnee, I got us a table at Nobu - let's get something to eat." But Johnee misunderstood Carson Daly. He thought he said "Please whip down my pants in the middle of Times Square and make spastic movements on my junk like you were Katherine Hepburn."

Surprisingly....

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/PLATE.jpg>

[reeshy]

Surprisingly....


Daly planted his ass against the Times Building and let Wadd have his way with him. He whipped out his cell phone and called the New York Times and asked for Rex Reed. Reed sped down to Times Square and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/graphics/campaigns/iraq/ffkeyuday.jpg>





This message was edited by reeshy on 6-3-03 @ 5:55 PM

[Death Metal Moe]

...Blew his own brains out on the scene. Even HE knew how horrific this was. But ex's corpse was still warm and intact below the neck, so Johnee and Carson took turns on either end of the corpse. Johnee preferred the top, because he could mash the area where his dick used to be against the bloody hole in the side of Rex's skull. So wrong, but yet so right!

The cops arrived and.......

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Tall_James]

The cops arrived and.......
...took one look at the carnage and took Johnee away. As Carson looked on teary-eyed as his lover was taken away in shackles, he heard Johnee say - "Can I request the Abner Louima suite? I brought my own plunger."

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/PLATE.jpg>

[AppleBoy]

Carson staged a protest by handcuffing himself to the fence outside the police station, rubbing his taint and chanting "Free johneewadd!!" Inside the station, however, Carson was the farthest thing from johnee's mind.

<IMG SRC="http://hstrial-gschwarz.homestead.com/files/devilssig1.jpg">

[reeshy]

Johneee was thrown in a cell with 13 transvestites. He almost swooned with pleasure. The TV's took one look at Wadd, then looked at each other and as one, they proceeded to throw Johneee a beating like he never had before. Johneee backed up against the bars and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.garlicnews.com/images/personals-nicknolte.jpg>
I LOVE THE NIGHTLIFE
I GOTTA BOOGIE

[Tall_James]

and he screamed "MY BODY IS A THEME PARK! RIDE MY LOG FLUME YOU SWEATY HE-SHE'S!!!!" Johnee tore off his orange, prison-issue jumpsuit but the trannies stopped dead in their tracks when they saw the syphillitic hole where his dink used to be. Disgusted, they beat him senseless, threw him in a corner and took turns pissing on him. As Johnee sat there with an open mouth, tears of joy ran down his face....

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/PLATE.jpg>

[reeshy]

"They like me...they really like me!!!" Wadd kept repeating over and over. By this time, the cops came in with their teargas and firehose and sprayed the cell down. While everybody was blinded by the gas, Wadd crept around on his knees and...

<IMG SRC=http://www.garlicnews.com/images/personals-nicknolte.jpg>
I LOVE THE NIGHTLIFE
I GOTTA BOOGIE

[Tall_James]

and fell down the drainage hole left by the trannies when they ripped the toilet off the floor to beat Johnee with.

He slipped and slid down the pipe with the rushing water, faster and faster all the while not knowing where he would end up. After about 3 hours of sloshing through fecal matter and some of Johnee's other favorite flavors - he re-emerged...

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/PLATE.jpg>

[Death Metal Moe]

MUTATED by the sewage!!!

No longer was he a dinkless simpleton! Now, charged with the power of shit, roadwayr unoff and illegal dumping he had SUPERPOWERS!

He was THE WADDSTER!!!

With the power to......

<IMG SRC=http://www.unhallowed.com/sigs/Dutchboy.gif>
<A HREF="http://www.unhallowed.com">www.unhallowed.com</A>
<B>DEATH FACTION 4 LIFE!!!</B>
666%

[Tall_James]

...turn brown turds green! It was without a doubt the worst superpower ever granted in history!

<img src=http://users.rcn.com/jamespatton/PLATE.jpg>