An Ode to Chairman Kaga

[IrishAlkey]

As I sit pondering the whereabouts of a Yuengling Lager bottle cap that flew to parts unkown in my bedroom, hoping not to step on it later while stumbling to the bathroom in a drunken stupor, consequently piercing the flesh on the underside of my foot and leaving a bloody trail throughout my apartment, which the dog will inevitably lick up while I sleep, the television grabs my attention. Stephen Lynch is on Comedy Central. I've seen this one before and have all the songs memorized, but I decide to take some time and watch it again. It's fun to sing along with a buzz. If I have to listen to the neighbors child crying and wailing at all hours of the night, they can endure my monotone voice for half an hour. In the past at this hour I would have been listening to the Ron and Fez show, laughing along, sending instant feedbacks with jokes probably only I thought were funny, calling in to embarrass myself over the New York airwaves and enjoying the company of two genuinely funny men right inside my living room. This was the past.

I'm careful not to ignore anybody who sends an IM while I'm watching television. Who knows what nugget of comedy brilliance is awaiting me at my monitor from the likes of ChickenHawk or Tenbatsuzen- pardon my absentmindedness- I'm not describing a dream here, this all actually took place. The IMs are slow. It's a Friday night. I have beer and a short attention span. Then, a reason to not turn on my away message slaps me in the face in the form of an IM from the one and only, MojoPin. Some say we like each other a little too much, I say to hell in a handbasket with them. Besides my obvious explosion of joy and fulfillment, it is brought to my attention one more reason to smile- Ron and Fez are mentioning me on their show, which I can't hear, but a cool thing nonetheless. I interrogate The Pin as to what the subject matter of said discussion is. As per usual it involves my girlfriend, with me as a sidenote. It's good to be the king's bitch, no? We continue conversing, more details of the conversation are revealed. It's also brought to my attention that two friends and board members, TooCute and Chairman Kaga (her name will henceforth always come before his- you'll soon know why) are in studio tonight. All the more reason for me to seek and obtain a way to hear the rest of the show, so I thought.

I ask the local "crack" dealer if he has anything for me. He obliges and I click on my stash. Snorting with Winamp is a bitch. Unfortunately, being on dial-up makes my rush skip all over the place, so I decide to give up and try and catch a buzz another day. Back to the television I go.

Not a minute passes before I'm drawn back into the world of e-mail, IM, buddy lists and message boards. Whereas my previous IM brought me joy and jubilation, this one bore intrigue and eventual disdain. I see the words "I know what you're getting me for our anniversary" on my screen. If the deliverer of this message had been anyone other than my girlfriend, I might not have been so bothered. Idealy, I would have replied "dad, you're such a kidder"! This was not the case.

"How do you know?"

"Kaga saw an IM between you and TooCute and just mentioned it on the air."

"@#$%"

The Chairman is a friend, an inspiration, an intellectual, a cultured voice of reason, wise, a confidant, charming, seasoned, wordly and an absolute dumbass. I hope you have full dental coverage because the foot inserted into your mouth must have chipped a few teeth. I hate surprises anyway. They're too predictable. The world is full of predictable surprises. Much like the fact that, one day, the Chairman would utter one word too many, rather than too cute.

I'm watching television again.

Nobody IM me. I'm off to the bathroom.



FUCK?!

Good news- found that bottle cap.

NO, Killian! Don't lick that!

CK1




<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[silera]

I guess it'd be too much for you to think up another gift while you're taking a dump?



<center>http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Silera/sig4.gif

<font size=3><font color=red>I can't stand myself either.</font></font></center>
<font color=FBF2F7>

[IrishAlkey]

You are now getting a package of Handi-Wipes. They're disposable.

It's all that popped into my head.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[JiZ]

The first time I read a post that had more than two lines. You are good at posting, tho NO mention of my IM's. Whatever!

<img src="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Alkey/zzzzzzjiz9.gif">

Ask me how YOU can help others hear Ron and Fez LIVE!!!

[IrishAlkey]

You are good at posting, tho NO mention of my IM's. Whatever!

I ask the local "crack" dealer if he has anything for me. He obliges and I click on my stash. Snorting with Winamp is a bitch. Unfortunately, being on dial-up makes my rush skip all over the place, so I decide to give up and try and catch a buzz another day. Back to the television I go.

You suck at reading between the lines.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[jamesdiggy]

Good news- found that bottle cap

Thank Yahweh, I will sleep the sleep of a 1000 Angels tonight.

<IMG SRC="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/diggy.gif">

I am now blessed with an ADF sigpic

[silera]

If you wiped your ass with handi wipes, you'd get more head.



<center>http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Silera/sig4.gif

<font size=3><font color=red>I can't stand myself either.</font></font></center>
<font color=FBF2F7>

[JiZ]

Holy *%^$. I guess it wasn't the first time I read a long post afetr all! I completely skipped over that part. Maybe it had something to do with drugs and I am 2 months shy of my 2 year anniversary of being clean. Not to mention tomorrow will be the 8th day of no cigarettes. Anyhow, wow...so now you have to get a new gift?

<img src="http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Alkey/zzzzzzjiz9.gif">

Ask me how YOU can help others hear Ron and Fez LIVE!!!

[IrishAlkey]

My dick isn't in my ass.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[IrishAlkey]

Anyhow, wow...so now you have to get a new gift?

No.

Kaga and I are going to the mall with his platinum Visa card.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[silera]

Your balls smell like shit.


<center>http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Silera/sig4.gif

<font size=3><font color=red>I can't stand myself either.</font></font></center>
<font color=FBF2F7>

[PanterA]

Your balls smell like shit.As soon as the admin page works, Alkeys got a new status.

<center><img style="backround:COLOR" style="color:RED" style="border style:double 6px" src="http://members.aol.com/fezwhatleyfan/rfsig"></center>

[IrishAlkey]

As soon as the admin page works, Alkeys got a new status.

Gluck, if you're out there, keep that page down.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[Geppetto]

I see the "golden gimp award" being replaced by "shit balls".

<IMG SRC =http://www.blakjeezis.homestead.com/files/geppetto.gif>

[GaryWyze]

My dick isn't in my ass.

<font color=purple>That's not the way I heard it.

<center>http://czm.racknine.net/images/krustysig.jpg

Much thanks to CZM for the killer sig

>>Fuck YERDADDY, Free Our POWs<<

[IrishAlkey]

Stay on topic.

Kaga is evil.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[ADF]

So what's the present? Is it herpes again?

<center><a href = "http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com"><img src = http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/adftron.gif title = "2%" width = 300 height = 100></a>
Do you know the way to San Jose?
</center>

[IrishAlkey]

She gets nothing and likes it.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[TheMojoPin]

She gets nothing and likes it.

No, no, she really CAN feel it. Work it, bubbletush, work it...

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << FREE YERDADDY! >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[IrishAlkey]

No, no, she really CAN feel it. Work it, bubbletush, work it...

You started this mess.

Your jokes aren't welcome here.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[TheMojoPin]

You're lucky you're pretty when I'm drinky.

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << FREE YERDADDY! >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[IrishAlkey]

You fucked a whore tonight.

I can smell it.

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[TheMojoPin]

Don't look at me if you're going to get like that. I'm drunk as hell and not going to take it anymore.

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << FREE YERDADDY! >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[GaryWyze]

<font color=purple>O'kay, here's what you've gotta do. Find a way to hack Kaga's account. Offer that Gluck guy naked pics of Silera if ya have to.

Once in, post as him. BUT, really long, lengthy posts. Throw in lots of big words. Maybe drop a few names, let it be known that you've got a couple of dollars.

In no time at all, resentment will grow. A fraction will come to think of you (him) as pretentious. Dare I say, a snob. It won't be true, but they'll think it anyway.

His message board experience will have effectively been ruined. And it will have been all of your doing.

That'll learn him!





<center>http://czm.racknine.net/images/krustysig.jpg

Much thanks to CZM for the killer sig

>>Fuck YERDADDY, Free Our POWs<<

[IrishAlkey]

O'kay, here's what you've gotta do. Find a way to hack Kaga's account. Offer that Gluck guy naked pics of Silera if ya have to.

Once in, post as him. BUT, really long, lengthy posts. Throw in lots of big words. Maybe drop a few names, let it be known that you've got a couple of dollars.

In no time at all, resentment will grow. A fraction will come to think of you (him) as pretentious. Dare I say, a snob. It won't be true, but they'll think it anyway.

His message board experience will have effectively been ruined. And it will have been all of your doing.

That'll learn him!

It's almost as if you can see into the past.



<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[Johnathan H Christ]

As per usual it involves my girlfriend, with me as a sidenote.

hehe.... welcome to my life in DC. glad i'm not the only one.



but about all that other stuff .....you seem like good peoples. you should kick it like that more often. i tip my redbull to you. respect.



<IMG SRC=http://subgenius.com/bigfist/pics8/heart-ignition2/funway.jpg width=100 height=100>



This message was edited by DrtyLuv on 4-19-03 @ 1:55 AM

[TheMojoPin]

Nobody likes it when someone brings a fashion Nazi to the party. Or when some homo names their dog after beer.

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << FREE YERDADDY! >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[IrishAlkey]

but about all that other stuff .....you seem like good peoples. you should kick it like that more often. i tip my redbull to you. respect.

I'll be down in D.C. soon enough.

I'm spreading out and widening the fanbase.



<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[TheGameHHH]

Just get drunk and kick his ass, that always worked for me.

<img src= http://wwfallon.homestead.com/files/RFnetTheGameHHH2.jpg>

[Dewey]

i tip my redbull to you.


You've got a dog named "redbull"? If so, I'm afraid to ask what "tipping" him means.

<IMG SRC="http://www.agw-werbeartikel.de/images/easy-rider.jpg"><br>"Still searching for America."

[Johnathan H Christ]

You've got a dog named "redbull"?
how did you get dog out of that? redbull is a delicious beverage.

<IMG SRC=http://subgenius.com/bigfist/pics6/a-misc-/dr-tripp/mush.JPG width=300 height=100>

[GaryWyze]

<font color=purple>Are you saying that your dog is delicious?

<center>http://czm.racknine.net/images/krustysig.jpg

Much thanks to CZM for the killer sig

>>Fuck YERDADDY, Free Our POWs<<

[guttersnipe]

I'll be down in D.C. soon enough.
I'm spreading out and widening the fanbase.


Yes he is, and I am his newest, biggest DC fan. I'll be
president of the DC division of the IrishAlkey Fan Club
soon.

~snipe


<img src=http://www.charm.net/~imp/me/eyes.jpg>

[DeltaPin]

My dick isn't in my ass.
If not your's, than who's is?

<img src=http://groups.yahoo.com/group/ktk7439/files/potch.JPG>

[Contra]

oh alkey

"You know there are people who THINK they have a sense of humor, even though they don't."

Another Contra and LSP joint production
<img src=http://members.aol.com/toddevflsp/images/contra4.gif>
The Fate Of Destruction Is Also The Joy Of Rebirth

[golfcourseguy]

Why not make the gift a volume (let's say a bouquet) of your "purple proseies"? I'm impressed, I'm sure she'd enjoy them too.


" editing posts since day one"

This message was edited by golfcourseguy on 4-19-03 @ 4:16 PM

[Johnathan H Christ]

Are you saying that your dog is delicious?

finger lickin good.... wanna taste it?

<IMG SRC=http://subgenius.com/bigfist/pics6/a-misc-/dr-tripp/mush.JPG width=300 height=100>



This message was edited by DrtyLuv on 4-19-03 @ 6:55 PM

[Tenbatsuzen]

I swear to God, when you're looped on as many painkillers as I'm on right now, Alkey is THAT MUCH MORE FUNNY.



<img src="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/franksig1.jpg">

[JustJon]

You only say that because he mentioned you.

<img src="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/bans/rfjustjon8.jpg">

[Tenbatsuzen]

<quote>You only say that because he mentioned you.
</quote>

I'm not nearly as witty as the Chairman, for alas, I have only a simple Fossil watch and I don't eat at the five-star restaurants.



<img src="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/franksig1.jpg">

[TheMojoPin]

Don't worry, Matty...we all think you'll always be the biggest ass you could possibly be.

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << December boys got it BAD. >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[silera]

IrishAlkey
My Balls Smell Like Shit

Goddamn Minorities always want to suck on my sheety balls!!!











****Status Hint****




<center>http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Silera/sig4.gif

<font size=3><font color=red>I can't stand myself either.</font></font></center>
<font color=FBF2F7>

[ADF]

I'm not nearly as witty as the Chairman, for alas, I have only a simple Fossil watch and I don't eat at the five-star restaurants.



I think you mean I'm not nearly as witty as the Chairman and I have only a simple Fossil watch and I don't eat at the five-star restaurants.


<center><a href = "http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com"><img src = http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/adftron.gif title = "2%" width = 300 height = 100></a>
Do you know the way to San Jose?
</center>

[IrishAlkey]

GRAMMAR RULES!

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[JustJon]

http://www.wiley.com/cda/cover/0,,0764553224|100,00.jpg

<img src="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/bans/rfjustjon8.jpg">

[Gmann]

My god, am I sorry I read all of this.

FEAR....FEAR attracts the fearful....the strong, the weak, the innocent, the corrupt.....FEAR....FEAR is my ally!!!

[grlNIN]

My god, am I sorry I read all of this.




drink 8 beers then say that

<center>Jesus Dont Want Me For A Sunbeam
<IMG SRC=http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=ariam21></center>


<center>And if you don't agree with me, fuck you too, cause you forced-happy motherfuckers make me just as sick.-FTL
</center>

[golfcourseguy]

Alky is the drinking man's esoheretic.


" editing posts since day one"

[JustJon]

drink 8 beers then say that

that's a requirement for reading any of alkey's posts.

<img src="http://www.chaoticconcepts.com/bans/rfjustjon8.jpg">

[grlNIN]

that's a requirement for reading any of alkey's posts



and writing them

<center>Jesus Dont Want Me For A Sunbeam
<IMG SRC=http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=ariam21></center>


<center>And if you don't agree with me, fuck you too, cause you forced-happy motherfuckers make me just as sick.-FTL
</center>

[ADF]

esoheretic


Wha-wha? I'm way too drunk to figure out what esoheretic means.

<center><a href = "http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com"><img src = http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/adftron.gif title = "2%" width = 300 height = 100></a>
Do you know the way to San Jose?
</center>

[TheMojoPin]

I'm just pissed because I mixed up the threads and thought this read "Do you like your Chairman Kaga flaming hot?"

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << December boys got it BAD. >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[Aggie]

I always knew the Chairman was no good. Anyone who knows that many facts about Cods has to be a little off.

So what the hell were/are you getting her? Inquiring minds want to know. It's not like you'll ruin the surprise now.

<IMG SRC="http://img.ranchoweb.com/images/aggie2323/devilssig.jpg ">

[TheMojoPin]

Perfume...now she'll just have to settle for a jug of "Piss-Off"...a-geh-geh-gargle...

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << December boys got it BAD. >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[IrishAlkey]

I've got another trick up my sleeve.

By the way... I call my pants "sleeve" and my penis "trick".

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[The Chairman]

My computer crapped out last week and I can't get used to Too Cute's Mac laptop and its touch pad or whatever.

In the meantime, I have been reading this thread and words cannot do justice in relating my sense of joyful anticipation at being on the verge of responding properly to Alkey's excellent homage.

All I will say at this point to those looking forward to my reply (they have already set aside an evening to read it) is that I will commence writing it soon after the box from Dell arrives.

I am particularly delighted that certain people who I thought were at least smart enough to know their limitations (and therefore know enough not to engage me) have provided the opportunity. Simply exposing their pussiness without provocation would be just plain mean, if not fundamentally unfair. Ideally, they and their pitiful attempts to crack (which, of course, transparently reveal pathetic jealousy) are best ignored. But it seems that, for some, posting in a Kaga or Kaga-inspired thread is a way (the only way) to experience a vicarious feeling of what the world might be like if they were not, in fact, a tool. Perhaps it's just a masochistic attempt to get some attention, any attention, even if it always exposes how sorry a person and disliked you are.

So, to my many, many wonderful friends on the Board, a word of thanks. To those of you who are friends and used this thread as an opportunity to crack on me (I can take it...since I can certainly dish it out), touch‚.

To the rest:

Prepare for The Tao of Kaga.

OK, this isn't even my official response, and I just checked my Patek Philippe and see that it's getting late and I have reservations at Le Bernardin in NYC at 8:00PM and must start getting ready. I'm driving tonight (only the second time I'll be using the new BMW Alpina..I hope they have a good valet....)

Perhaps I'll wear my new Brioni suit, a Hermes tie and Bruno Magli shoes. Or maybe I'll just go casual and fly a Helmut Lang shirt, Paul Stewart blazer, Ermenegildo Zegna pants, Salvatore Ferragamo loafers and Carhartt jacket (of course.)

Until Next Time.

Dr. Kaga



<img src = http://atamichimpo.50megs.com/images/kagastinksig.jpg>
2%


slanted and enchanted...
a skidmark production sig!

[golfcourseguy]

I'm way too drunk to figure out what esoheretic means.


(To me) It means "he has a helmet". It wouldn't be the first time I've tripped in the "word-playground". My elbows are still bruised from the time I decided that "to invent a 'French idiom' ( diacritical marks be damned) " was a "good idea".
Oh , Chairman you're back, what a coincidence.


" editing posts since day one"

[saveopieanthony.net]

naked pictures of silera?????

i'm definately in...how much you want? name your price.

j/k

not really though..lol

BIG ASS CARD HOLDER 316006 r+f are gone. Al is still gay. and Billy is still a drunk. and a waste. and sad. I even miss Billy.

SEEEEEYAAAAA

[TheMojoPin]

I hope Kaga's last post made Matty explode.

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << December boys got it BAD. >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[Def Dave in SC]

Wait, so this isnt about Iron Chef? Dammit. Its never about Iron Chef.

Well, it is now!!!!
<img src="http://www.cnn.com/2000/FOOD/news/04/07/iron.chef/1.iron.chef.jpg">


The Montgomery County Mobster
<img src="http://members.hometown.aol.com/gpigking/myhomepage/```def.gif?mtbrand=AOL_US">
Much Love to my Homie dcpete

Its Like Having a Football Helmet Inside Your Head

This message was edited by Def Dave in DC on 4-23-03 @ 9:20 PM

[Tenbatsuzen]

I hope Kaga's last post made Matty explode.


Someone thinks highly of themselves when they think "not engaging" is equivalent to "knowing their limitations".

It's better to be feared than loved.

Look at the time. My Fossil says it's close to 9:30. Time to hop in my Dodge and go eat some greasy hamburgers at the Rutgers campus. Hope I don't stain my Old Navy polo shirt.



<img src="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/franksig1.jpg">

This message was edited by Tenbatsuzen on 4-23-03 @ 9:28 PM

[TheMojoPin]

Someone thinks highly of themselves when they think "not engaging" is equivalent to "knowing their limitations".

I'm, like, the best detective in the world and stuff.

<img src="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=TheMojoPin">
2% << December boys got it BAD. >> "You can tell some lies about the good times you've had/But I've kissed your mother twice and now I'm working on your dad..."

[GaryWyze]

I will commence writing it soon after the box from Dell arrives.

<font color=purple>Well, I see somebody's too good for a Compaq.

I guess I'm outta the loop on who hates who, but Kaga = cool. Don't player hate!

<center>http://czm.racknine.net/images/krustysig.jpg

Much thanks to CZM for the killer sig

>>Fuck YERDADDY, Free Our POWs<<

[TooCute]

guess I'm outta the loop on who hates who

You been living on Mars for the past decade?

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/toocute2.gif>
!! 2% !!<font color=FBF2F7>

[GaryWyze]

<font color=purple>All up to speed now, thanks.

<center>http://czm.racknine.net/images/krustysig.jpg

Much thanks to CZM for the killer sig

>>Fuck YERDADDY, Free Our POWs<<

[Tenbatsuzen]

I'm, like, the best detective in the world and stuff.


You are Inch-High Private Eye? Cool!



<img src="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/franksig1.jpg">

[The Chairman]

Someone thinks highly of themselves when they think "not engaging" is equivalent to "knowing their limitations".

It's better to be feared than loved.

1. Who are you referring to? If it's me, I don't live in DC dude, I live close and would love to know what you mean by "limitations." Intellectual? Physical? Pugilistic? Please explain so everyone can know them, and then I BEG you to tell them to me to my face.

2. Who fears you?

Oh shit, there I go again...

Let me put my big stick aside for a moment and speak softly instead.

I knew we should have stopped back there
by the pudding station
but the pudding people were so---well--
full of themselves.

The Sphinx didn't want to come this far
even though we answered her questions
and threw in a bonus answer. "As honey is to the jaguar."

And we so well all along too--

Coming up is the world's longest single cantilever span.
I am numb with thrips.

John Ashbery

I remain,

The Chairman






<img src = http://atamichimpo.50megs.com/images/kagastinksig.jpg>
2%


slanted and enchanted...
a skidmark production sig!

[Arienette]

I hope Kaga's last post made Matty explode.i don't know about him, but i think i may have... yet, oddly, i'm still able to post. maybe that septum i found by my feet was just a candy corn i dropped and not the first sign of my impending explosion. myabe i'll be okay.

<center><img src="http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/arisubway.gif" height=100 width=300</img>

we hope your rules and wisdom choke you</center>

[GaryWyze]

<font color=purple>Or maybe it was all that hot sauce?

<center>http://czm.racknine.net/images/krustysig.jpg

Much thanks to CZM for the killer sig

>>Fuck YERDADDY, Free Our POWs<<

[Doogie]

This thread is like a debate between the characters on Cheers...lighten up people, sheesh...

<IMG SRC=http://www.cnn.com/2000/LAW/scotus/10/02/scotus.cheers.ap/story.scotus.cheers.cliff.jpg>

<IMG SRC=http://www.tv-scripte.de/frasier/cast/frasier.jpg>

<IMG SRC=http://www.eonline.com/On/Holly/Greatest/Facts/Images/s.cheers.jpg>

<IMG SRC=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/doogie.gif>
ADF Fan since day one...this sig rocks!!!
"Impossible is only the failure of imagination"
<marquee behavior=alternate>The Jedi Master and an incredible hound dogga</marquee>

[Thebazile78]

Perhaps it's just a masochistic attempt to get some attention, any attention, even if it always exposes how sorry a person and disliked you are.

But Inky's been banned.

Why do we all end up acting like 5th-graders here?

I'm not saying that everybody has to like everybody else, or even TOLERATE everybody else, but deliberately posting in threads that certain of us start solely to trash, provoke or otherwise distract from the conversation strikes me as "infighting" and is against the FAQ.

Disagreements/ debates add a bit of color to our little world here and we get to hear all kinds of views, BUT this whole thing is getting a little out of hand. You're stooping to below your intelligence. . . ALL OF YOU.

I expect this post may result in my beratement, but, since you all feel the need to flex your board-popularity might, have fun.

This is ridiculous and I'm truly surprised and dismayed that you can't see how childish you're all being.

<img src="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/lizsig2.jpg">
<br>"If human beings stopped exercising their lips, their brains would start working" - Ford Prefect

[TooCute]

But Inky's been banned.


Uhm, I don't think he was talking about Inky.

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/toocute2.gif>
!! 2% !!<font color=FBF2F7>

[Doogie]

Disagreements/ debates add a bit of color to our little world here and we get to hear all kinds of views, BUT this whole thing is getting a little out of hand. You're stooping to below your intelligence. . . ALL OF YOU.

I expect this post may result in my beratement, but, since you all feel the need to flex your board-popularity might, have fun.

<IMG SRC=http://students.washington.edu/ucf/images/Boy%20flexing.jpg>

Liz is right, you people all need to take a step away and breath and say to yourselves "What would Brian Boitano do in this situation?" We all may disagree but that is no reason to make this shit personal. I love you all, but dont make me whip out my big stick, they be some crying people when I besa done...

:-) SMiles make it all better.

<IMG SRC=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/doogie.gif>
ADF Fan since day one...this sig rocks!!!
"Impossible is only the failure of imagination"
<marquee behavior=alternate>The Jedi Master and an incredible hound dogga</marquee>

[silera]

I got perfume!!!!

So many many bottles of perfume!!!!

YAY!

YAY for me!!!



<center>http://groups.yahoo.com/group/silera/files/Silera/sig4.gif

<font size=3><font color=red>I can't stand myself either.</font></font></center>
<font color=FBF2F7>

[fluffernutter]

OK, this isn't even my official response, and I just checked my Patek Philippe and see that it's getting late and I have reservations at Le Bernardin in NYC at 8:00PM and must start getting ready. I'm driving tonight (only the second time I'll be using the new BMW Alpina..I hope they have a good valet....)

Perhaps I'll wear my new Brioni suit, a Hermes tie and Bruno Magli shoes. Or maybe I'll just go casual and fly a Helmut Lang shirt, Paul Stewart blazer, Ermenegildo Zegna pants, Salvatore Ferragamo loafers and Carhartt jacket (of course.)

I am incredibly confused as to what all of that means.

Enlighten me?

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=fluffer6">

<marquee behavior=scroll direction="left">Statistics say, chances of being gay are what, one in ten? That means there is a 40 percent chance that one of the guys in Pantera likes men. - "Hats Off To Halford" - Atom</marquee>

[TooCute]

I am incredibly confused as to what all of that means.

Enlighten me?

It's called "name-dropping".

<img src=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/toocute2.gif>
!! 2% !!<font color=FBF2F7>

[fluffernutter]

Thats what I figured. Gone for a few weeks and one misses a lot.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=fluffer6">

<marquee behavior=scroll direction="left">Statistics say, chances of being gay are what, one in ten? That means there is a 40 percent chance that one of the guys in Pantera likes men. - "Hats Off To Halford" - Atom</marquee>

[PanterA]

sniff sniff

This thread smells like someone got a fat mans ass in there face!

<center><img style="backround:COLOR" style="color:RED" style="border style:double 3px" src="http://members.aol.com/fezwhatleyfan/rfsig"></center><center><b>I Crush The Rush, I Rule You Fool</b></center><center><A HREF="http://www.b3ta.com/mind-control/">You know you want to click it.</A></center><center><font color="red">38.6%</font></center>

[Thebazile78]

You mean like this :



http://www.ringfury.com/photos/rikishi-and-christian.jpg

????

Pantera is truly God.

<img src="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/lizsig2.jpg">
<br>"If human beings stopped exercising their lips, their brains would start working" - Ford Prefect

[The Chairman]

This is ridiculous and I'm truly surprised and dismayed that you can't see how childish you're all being.

I agree. Thanks Liz.

The Chairman offers an Olive (Branch) as the Secret Ingredient.

cK1





<img src = http://atamichimpo.50megs.com/images/kagastinksig.jpg>
2%


slanted and enchanted...
a skidmark production sig!

[fluffernutter]

I will go ahead and present a Laurel.....

...and Hardy handshake.

<IMG SRC="http://members.hostedscripts.com/randomimage.cgi?user=fluffer6">

<marquee behavior=scroll direction="left">Statistics say, chances of being gay are what, one in ten? That means there is a 40 percent chance that one of the guys in Pantera likes men. - "Hats Off To Halford" - Atom</marquee>

[IrishAlkey]

This thread smells like someone got a fat mans ass in there face!

From perfumes to ass crack...

Where did I go wrong?

<center>http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/alkey2.gif</center><marquee><font color=red size=4>2%</font></marquee>

[Doogie]

Just remember this little adage people...

<IMG SRC=http://www.segnbora.com/images/brian.gif>

<IMG SRC=http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/doogie.gif>
ADF Fan since day one...this sig rocks!!!
"Impossible is only the failure of imagination"
<marquee behavior=alternate>The Jedi Master and an incredible hound dogga</marquee>

[The Chairman]

I think Brian Boitano is a gay.

cK1

<img src = http://atamichimpo.50megs.com/images/kagastinksig.jpg>
2%


slanted and enchanted...
a skidmark production sig!

[Tenbatsuzen]

Screw you guys, I'm going home!



<img src="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/franksig1.jpg">

[Thebazile78]

I agree. Thanks Liz.

The Chairman offers an Olive (Branch) as the Secret Ingredient.


Olive (branch) accepted.

I trusted that you are a reasonable man. This has proven it to me. Thank you.

<img src="http://tenbatsuzen.homestead.com/files/lizsig2.jpg">
<br>"If human beings stopped exercising their lips, their brains would start working" - Ford Prefect