i need help with my paper thats due on monday

[phixion]

okay for this paper i have to tear down creationism (people who believe the Bible's creation story is real and should be treated like a history text book)

so far ive talked about :
the size of the Garden of Eden (it would hafta be friggin huge to fit all thos animals)
noah's ark ( you couldnt get 2 of every animal on the arc, and if u did what would u feed them? also if only noah's family survived we would have a genetically weak population, )
disease (if the great flood occurred then most diseases that require a human host should be destroyed)
evolution (bacteria's resistance to antibiotics, our own vestigial organs like the tailbone and appendix,)
the age of the Earth (Creationists believe the Earth is 4,000 years old, yet we have fossils carbon dated that are far older than that.)

i know im forgetting ideas and i know u intelligent people out there can help me........

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"smoking weed, smoking weed doing coke, drinking beers
drinking beers, beers, beersrolling fatties, smoking bluntswho smokes the blunts?we smoke the blunts." -Jay

[HBox]

It sounds like you have one bitter professor.

[reeshy]

It also sounds like you're in a shit load of trouble!!

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[2BigFeet]

Er, um, uh, er.....

Ow, my eye, my doctor told me not to get pudding in it

[shamus mcfitzy]

the age of the Earth (Creationists believe the Earth is 4,000 years old, yet we have fossils carbon dated that are far older than that.)


i was always puzzled by that, considering that Mesopotamia dates back to 4500 B.C., and even then, the basis of Creationism should be Mesopotamian (Arab) then, not Christianity

...........I have nothing to add to your paper though.........

[Mr. Pink 2]

sorry.

[Johnny Fontane]

This is your paper:

"Creationism. It's all bullshit. Ya hear me? Bullshit.

This bullshit class ain't gonna do me no good in the real world, so fuck you and the horse you rode in on.

Special thanks to Johnny Fontane...the wind beneath my wings."

And then Johnny Fontane comes along with his olive-oil voice, and guinea charm.

[kc7586]

how about if there is no such thing as evolution and adam and eve were the first two people, then the whole world is made up of inscest. in order to populate the world adam and eve had to have kids, then they would have had to keep it in the family to keep the human race going. so now everyone is really everyone elses brother or sister if this is true.

and i have procrastinated the day away and have my own paper to write. i have to rip the wellfare system a new one. i hate writing papers. good luck with yours.

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I am woman hear me roar, bitch, and whine.

[Freebird]

I know this is also no help for your paper (although, honestly, if you're coming here for help you are in trouble :) ) but it's a pity your paper couldn't have been in defense of creationism. Now THAT would have taken some real creativity on your part.

-----------------------------
Now I'm starving

I'm about to turn it up a notch!

[Crippler]

Phix...here's some stuff I used when I helped my little brother write a paper similar to this just before he graduated (unfortunately he keeps terrible records, so I can't send you the paper itself). Hope it helps:

For the comedy view of the arguement, here's the Creationism website, you might find some points worth bringing up there. There'a an especially humorous paper on the origins of the Genesis Flood:

http://www.ICR.org/research

This site should give you some good stuff, especially the second half of Chapter #9:

http://reason-science-faith.co.uk/

Here's a scientist taking creationists to task, just be careful of how much you use, this could be your whole paper:
(Creationist Exposed)

http://www.talkorigins.org/origins/faqs-creationists.html

Good luck.

SigPic thanks to TenbatsuZen
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[center](Miles)[center]

This message was edited by Crippler on 3-8-03 @ 11:34 PM

[phixion]

crippler thanx

i owe u a blunt and if i get a good grade on the paper ill turn that blunt into a gotti.

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"smoking weed, smoking weed doing coke, drinking beers
drinking beers, beers, beersrolling fatties, smoking bluntswho smokes the blunts?we smoke the blunts." -Jay

[shellcreatives]

Feel free to ignore this, it's in defense of creationism. The earth was created in seven days, but never was a day defined as 24 hours. Seven days could have been millions of years (and years may not be 365 days). That would be the reason creationists say 4000 years. Because of course, by our interpritations, 4000 years is a short time, but by God's definition, a year could be several million of our years. Also, when did creationists deny we are related? But on another note, the population of Earth's humans is devided into three sub-sections. Adam was black, formed by earth. Eve was white, formed by a bone. Orientals are a combo of Adam and Eve. Their faces are different because one day an Oriental Jew was walking around and got hit by a shovel. Or, the technical explanation is because (and this could very well be true), that their location on Earth forced them to evolve differently.

<img src=http://gvac.50megs.com/images/heyyousig.gif><br><b><font color="red">Hey GVac... Can I borrow your sig for a bit?</font</b>

[phixion]

Feel free to ignore this, it's in defense of creationism. The earth was created in seven days, but never was a day defined as 24 hours. Seven days could have been millions of years (and years may not be 365 days). That would be the reason creationists say 4000 years. Because of course, by our interpritations, 4000 years is a short time, but by God's definition, a year could be several million of our years. Also, when did creationists deny we are related? But on another note, the population of Earth's humans is devided into three sub-sections. Adam was black, formed by earth. Eve was white, formed by a bone. Orientals are a combo of Adam and Eve. Their faces are different because one day an Oriental Jew was walking around and got hit by a shovel. Or, the technical explanation is because (and this could very well be true), that their location on Earth forced them to evolve differently.



um ur defense is l;ogical and understandable but then u dont know what creationists beleive. they take the bible as a text book, word ofr word accuray. what your telling me is the current Catholic view of the creation of Earth. We believe its a metaphor not to be taken literally.

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"smoking weed, smoking weed doing coke, drinking beers
drinking beers, beers, beersrolling fatties, smoking bluntswho smokes the blunts?we smoke the blunts." -Jay

[TooCute]

If this is an assignment where you're allowed to go out and read other peoples' arguments on the topic, go to your local Barnes and Noble and buy this book : http://search.barnesandnoble.com/textbooks/booksearch/isbnInquiry.asp?userid=2VGAK9MA3K&isbn=0878931848&TXT=Y&itm=9 - Science on Trial, the Case for Evolution. It's written by Doug Futuyma, who was faculty in my department until this year (he just left for Michigan) - it is excellently written and easy for non-scientists to understand. It is also the book that is most often cited by creationists when they're trying to refute evolution.
If the assignement is to write this paper on your own, based on your own ideas and what you have learned in your class abuout evolution and creationism, then you ought to do just that and ignore the book :)


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[TheMojoPin]

The earth was created in seven days, but never was a day defined as 24 hours. Seven days could have been millions of years (and years may not be 365 days). That would be the reason creationists say 4000 years. Because of course, by our interpritations, 4000 years is a short time, but by God's definition, a year could be several million of our years.

This was how I always tried to rationalize my Catholic upbringing and what I learned about evolution. I mean, right from the very start, I had no problem "believing" in evolution or the "natural" creation of the universe...the idea of a "Big Bang" is pretty friggin' God-like to begin with.

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[FiveB247]

You should mention some ideas and notions made in the book "Inherit the Wind". It talks of the "Scopes Monkey trial".

[TooCute]

So God was creating the universe, and he turned to one of his angels and said, "Hey, I just made this really great thing - first it's light out, then it gets dark!"

The angel's all, "Cool! What are you going to do now?"

God goes, "I think I'll call it a day."



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[TheGameHHH]

How much are you cooralating science into this paper? Cause you could also talk about how studies show no historical record of a flood during the time of Noah in the area he was believed to have lived in. The soil around that area doesn't really support the theory there was a massive flood.

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Thanks ADF

[ChickenHawk]

Worse comes to worst, you can pull the bigotry card.
Just sue the school and say the teacher made you
write a paper on something that challenged your
religious beliefs. That'll take care of your paper
problems, and you'll make some money in the process!


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SIG CURRENTLY STUNTING * NEW SIG COMING THIS SPRING

[dcpete]

The earth was created in seven days, but never was a day defined as 24 hours.

actually, in the direct translation of genesis, the word isn't day. It is a word that has no current synonym. However, it means a length of time. So to make it seem more miracalus the biblical scholars translated it as day, because shorter time frame is more powerful. So if you look at it in this frame of reference, in some places science and religion actually match up.

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the praise is pouring in for dcpete. Just look at these qoutes:

IM me at gpigking or suffer a fate worse than death.

[TooCute]

How much are you cooralating science into this paper? Cause you could also talk about how studies show no historical record of a flood during the time of Noah in the area he was believed to have lived in. The soil around that area doesn't really support the theory there was a massive flood.


actually I just saw a whole special on this on TLC (may have been the history channel or discovery... one of those) and the fact that there totally is evidence for like all those plagues and the parting of the red (in actuality 'reed') sea and all that - it was pretty interesting.

uhm, yeah, so anyway...

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[TheGameHHH]

Those specials on any of those channels aren't really reguarded as totally factual by most top historians.

<img src= http://thereisnogod.faithweb.com/images/hhh.gif>
Thanks ADF

[FiveB247]

HHH, I've never heard of any of those types of specials being fasle or misleading (either TLC, Discovery or the History Channel).

PS...Look up "inherit the wind"! It discusses all of these topics...how long it took to create the earth, time frame of a "a day" as well as Darwin.

[Death Metal Moe]

You could always just give him the Rub and Tug.

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