Suicide Nightmares- 9 years later

[Dirtybird11]

Aloha Horde King!!
Can u give me some advice on this?
maybe if anyone else has a similar situation , they could advise me as well- thanks
(long story short)

in 1994 i watched my best friend & bandmate of 16 years drive into a tree & kill himself,
i've pretty much self medicated ever since. I
Never had ANY dreams about it. (until 5 or 6 months ago.)
i woke myself up once screaming and the rest of the times i wake up in a cold sweat & very ill..
do u know of any nightmare cures? or why after this long it's starting to really kick my ass??
i think about him and the accident everyday, but now i am reliving it in my dreams..but its more graphic and very vivd.. like i said, i have to sometimes wake up and just walk around for a bit shakin my head.
really sucks.. any thoughts? thanks~
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This message was edited by PERRYNOID on 3-5-03 @ 2:44 PM

[Jennitalia]

I'm sorry to hear about your friend. That must have been so horrible. Unfortunately, self medicating yourself doesnt make things go away. It sounds as if you haven't really dealt with the situation, and the feelings that you have, which I'm sure are too heavy for you to handle by yourself. Starting a journal of your nightmares may help you sort things out for you. Seeing a psychologist about this will definitely help you out, as I'm sure the Horde King will also recommend. If you're uncomfortable about seeing a psychologist, maybe you could talk to some friends, or join a support group of people who are going through, or who have went through similar experiences. By all means, don't continue to deal with this alone. It sounds as though it's becoming too much to deal with on your own. Hope this helps a little bit.

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[Death Metal Moe]

That's tough. Sorry to hear that man. I don't wish a situation like that on anyone.

I agree with Jenn. It sounds like you may have tried to bypass dealing with this and it's starting to slowly come back into your head.

I have no idea how to deal with it but Horde King always gives solid advice.

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[HordeKing1]

PERRYNOID - For clarification purposes, you headed the thread "suicide nightmares" but you described what seems to be a driving accident.

As pointed out above, (and as we discussed long ago) self-medication is not the answer. It only creates additional problems. It can be considered a coping mechanism, but it's very maladaptive - hurtful to yourself.

You've never had dreams about their death until 5 or 6 months ago. Depending on your drug use, that may very well have been due to an inability to enter into a deep dream state.

The most obvious question though is what happened at that time, that brought about these dreams. You may be asssociating their deaths with something from your current experiences, or you may be thinking about it more now, or you may have finally begun to process their deaths.

You definitely need some insight as to what is going on. You may need help in processing their death. You may be experiencing delayed bereavement. In any event, I recomend that you get to a therapist and discuss all of this together. There are support groups for people's whose friends or relatives committed suicide. There are also support groups for people experiencing bereavement. While these groups can help, I suggest the first step is to seek out professional help, AND go to see a regular MD for a full checkup. Sometimes there are phsycial reasons for these things.

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