Have You Ever Been Kincked in the Balls? [Archive]

Captain Rooster

10-02-2002, 06:00 PM

I can remember that dark, dark day in kindergarten when Alison nailed me in the sack with a furious front kick. I touched her play doh (no metaphor there either).

Gentlemen, has a chica ever "rang your bells" before?

I had a flashback today....*shutter.

<CENTER><img src=http://ltrooster.homestead.com/files/TalimanSig.jpg></center>
<center>Hey, Al Queda, keep hiding. We're coming.</center>

Captain Rooster

10-02-2002, 06:04 PM

I put a fucking "n" in the fuckin' post title. I am an asshole! *Punches his own sack repeatedly*

<CENTER><img src=http://ltrooster.homestead.com/files/TalimanSig.jpg></center>
<center>Hey, Al Queda, keep hiding. We're coming.</center>

This message was edited by LTRooster on 10-2-02 @ 10:05 PM

McNabbShouldDie

10-02-2002, 06:06 PM

This ho Ashley got me real hard one time cuz I stole her shinguard in gym. Sure it was mean, but i didnt think she'd be so offended. That whore.

OOOOO, kiNcked in the balls. Sorry, never been kincked before.

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Captain Rooster

10-02-2002, 06:11 PM

I stole her shinguard in gym.

CLASSIC! That bitch!

Did you give it back?

<CENTER><img src=http://ltrooster.homestead.com/files/TalimanSig.jpg></center>
<center>Hey, Al Queda, keep hiding. We're coming.</center>

JerseyRich

10-02-2002, 06:21 PM

I'm a lover, not a fighter.

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I'd like an order of UH UH!
With a side of some UH UH!

irishkb

10-02-2002, 06:21 PM

i have been kicked in the balls and have been hit the balls by a soccer ball more times than i can count......

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Captain Rooster

10-02-2002, 06:23 PM

I'm a lover, not a fighter.

Good for you, bro. When I was in middle school I felt as if I had a bullseye on my crouch. Bitches man, they know the Achilles heel.

<CENTER><img src=http://ltrooster.homestead.com/files/TalimanSig.jpg></center>
<center>Hey, Al Queda, keep hiding. We're coming.</center>

ToddEVF

10-02-2002, 06:26 PM

i nave been kicked and punched and open palmed in the nuts numberous times. . . so much i might soon be sterile for 5 more shots

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JerseyRich

10-02-2002, 06:27 PM

Good for you, bro. When I was in middle school I felt as if I had a bullseye on my crouch. Bitches man, they know the Achilles heel.

And with the size of Gvac's sack(hanging down to his socks), I'm sure his balls were kicked a lot

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I'd like an order of UH UH!
With a side of some UH UH!

DarkHippie

10-02-2002, 06:40 PM

And with the size of Gvac's sack(hanging down to his socks), I'm sure his balls were kicked a lot
Gvac's always talking about his balls, Mikey D had his "great adventure", and Jersey Rich is English; just how gay IS the RonFez.net Band? :)

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EffMeBoobs

10-02-2002, 06:45 PM

Ohhhhh suuuuuure....we all
know what they're all doing
during Sunday practices.
Blowing each other's trumpets. I
bet their lips hurt Monday moring.

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Fallon

10-02-2002, 07:28 PM

I put a fucking "n" in the fuckin' post title. I am an asshole! *Punches his own sack repeatedly*

If only you were a mod who could have deleted the topic and start over. :)

And no I've never been kicked in the nuts.

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fluffernutter

10-02-2002, 07:46 PM

I was thinking of starting a thread on this topic because I got here a classic story of acceptance and stupidity here.
In the 7th grade it would always be the cool thing to go and hang in the boys room after I had always wanted to fit in with the "in crowd" and even though I was accepted, my low self esteem made me think I was not. Anyway, there was only about 35 guys in the 7th grade and we all would cram into the boys room. One day this farmer kid jessee said to me, "Hey, Let me see how close to your nuts I can come with my foot." I was like ok. Will i still be able to hang with you guys then? I was a real idiot. So anyway he kicked and kicked HARD! I never felt a pain like that in my life and have never since. It was the worst. So as I was there hunched over everyone was like "Oh fuck! Oh shit! Oh fuck! Oh shit!" I managed to make my way to the nurses office and never dimed the kid out because that was how popular I wanted to be. Hey, you could'nt be a snitch in the 7th grade so I never told. i was just like, "I had an accident and I need to go home" I checked the boys and they were purple and it hurt to piss so incredibly bad. The next day when i got to school everyone had heard and was like "hey, you gonna kick his ass? You should kick his ass, You should really kick his ass!" I never did and just turned the other cheek and was the better kid. Turns out they never messed with me again. Sorry this was long but I remember this like it was yesterday.

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Captain Obvious

10-02-2002, 07:50 PM

I've been hit I don't recall getting kicked...I think I would remember that!

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EffMeBoobs

10-02-2002, 07:50 PM

Kincked balls just sounds
awful and painful.

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<marquee behavior=alternate>God bless America</marquee>

<marquee>We Will Never Forget - September 11th, 2001</marquee>

TheMojoPin

10-02-2002, 09:26 PM

I was once Knicked in the balls when Patrick Ewing went on an insane coke bing back in '88.

What I find worse than being flat out whomped in the hads is when they just get a grazing blow, and then less than a minute later you get that awful, "I'm gonna vomit everything I've eaten this week" feel come all over you...

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SuperClerk

10-02-2002, 10:19 PM

Never been kicked in the balls. But once I whacked myself in the balls while doing a DX crotch chop. Not good.

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DreamWeaver

10-03-2002, 04:12 AM

I knicked some nasty bastard in the balls once. It looked like it hurt.

getting punched in the tit hurts too so don't feel so bad.

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A.J.

10-03-2002, 04:58 AM

Yes.

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SilentSpic

10-03-2002, 05:00 AM

phew, never have...
Sorry for the bastard who been kicked there. I http://www.silentspic.com/emoticons/praying.gif it never happens to me.

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my_mr_happy

10-03-2002, 05:24 AM

my friend her name Was Julie stambross... and after she knicked me .. She felt so bad- this was 7th grade- she kissed me. It was my second french kiss I had ever had. Thank god it was not my first I would be scared for life! I only wish I could have been somewhat aware... she hit me HARD...

Death Metal Moe

10-03-2002, 07:34 AM

ALWAYS in Te Kwon Do. I took it for a few years back in like 7th grade. It was fun, but if you went up for a Roundhouse kick to the face, and you opponenet went for a level side kick, Peanut Butter is what the kids called it my friends.

I guess cause of the Pee and your nuts. Huh huh.

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Bill From Yorktown

10-03-2002, 07:38 AM

Kincked balls just sounds
awful and painful.

Even a light tap in the yambag huuuuuurts - right up through your stomach - kinda "crampy" (no comments from Opie)

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ADF

10-03-2002, 08:14 AM

Word on the street is that GVAC has gigantic stainless-steel ball bearings for nads.

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JustJon

10-03-2002, 08:54 AM

I practice kungfu. I've been kicked. It hurts, you walk... ok, stumble... it off. Saw a guy kicked in the taint once, he was dying in pain too.

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Jennitalia

10-03-2002, 08:58 AM

there's somebody i'd like to kick in the balls

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BrianTheBailBondsman

10-03-2002, 08:59 AM

i had a football helmet hit me in 'em OUCH... But hey guys what about when u get just slightly hit in them that little "PING" man that hurts!
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This message was edited by BrianTheBailBondsman on 10-3-02 @ 2:52 PM

Green Lantern

10-03-2002, 09:22 AM

I got kicked in the balls while free-sparring during karate classes. And I screamed louder than Mariah Carey.

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Green Lantern

10-03-2002, 09:27 AM

And with the size of Gvac's sack(hanging down to his socks), I'm sure his balls were kicked a lot

Why are you looking Gvac's sack? Do you want to get in the backseat of a caddy with him?

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Yerdaddy

10-03-2002, 09:33 AM

I got exactly what Rooster said: Kincked. I had something called "tortion" where the pups wrestle around in their sack down there until their leashes get kinked and circulation gets cut off. It feels like the glancing blow Mojo mentioned, but repeated over and over for days at a time. Finally had to have them tied down. Am I saying this on the internet? Damn.

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furie

10-03-2002, 09:51 AM

Once, when I was in the second grade. The second time was in a defensive tactics class. But i was well padded for that. I still flinched though...

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Green Lantern

10-03-2002, 10:02 AM

I knicked some nasty bastard in the balls once.

Reminded me to never piss you off.

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FelixDasGato

10-03-2002, 10:18 AM

Sure have and it was none to pleasent. I think it was in second grade, me and some girl had an argument and she wound up kicking me dead in the nads. I could not hit a girl so I glued her lunchbox shut.

Contra

10-03-2002, 10:27 AM

ahh yes i have had this unplesant experience.

i know now just walking up to a girl and kissing her on the mouth may not be a good idea, especially when she doesnt even know who you are.

i got kneed squa in the nuts!

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Jennitalia

10-03-2002, 10:31 AM

my friend and i were wrestling around with this pussy ex boyfriend of mine, and he accidentally got kicked in the nads and ended up tossing his cookies. he cried too, not that it took much to get him to do that...what a loser

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next time you want pussy, just look in the mirror, baby
thanks for wasting my time

BrianTheBailBondsman

10-03-2002, 10:44 AM

I got a foot in the balls once actually it was a few times some chick did it gently and rubbed .. does that count?

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BrianTheBailBondsman

10-03-2002, 10:53 AM

? Exactly how does one get kiNked?

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Captain Rooster

10-03-2002, 12:29 PM

"Kincked" is actually the Ugandan word meaning: a fuckin' mod can't fuckin' type after a brewski.

It's actually cool to hear a Ungandan drunk use that word -all the clicks and humming is a riot.

I think most of the ladies here have "kinked" up a ball or two before. I can only fantasize and wonder though;)

Actually, Gvac does not have a problem with being kicked in the balls. He just steps on his occasionally.

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<center>Hey, Al Queda, keep hiding. We're coming.</center>

This message was edited by LTRooster on 10-3-02 @ 4:37 PM

Fallon

10-03-2002, 12:34 PM

Never been kicked in the balls. But once I whacked myself in the balls while doing a DX crotch chop. Not good.
I've done that, felt like a real ass afterwards.

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AppleBoy

10-03-2002, 12:52 PM

I don't remember ever getting kicked in the nuts but I do remember trying to short hop a ball at baseball practice once and wound up taking it in the sack.

In the 8th grade, my friends Paul and Ray were working on a bulletin board. Ray was was standing on a chair and Pauls walks up to him and says "Ray, you want a penis punch?". Ray says "What?" and Paul hauls off and lets him have it. As Ray is bent over in pain, the teacher comes over and wants to know what's going on. Paul tells her and she starts laughing but then realizes that she should tell him that that wasn't a very nice thing to do, all the while still laughing.

"Ray, you want a penis punch?" "What?" POW!

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blakjeezis

10-03-2002, 12:54 PM

getting punched in the tit hurts too so don't feel so bad.
They're they go again! Every time men start talking about getting tagged in the pills, women gotta bring up the rack. Let me tell you something, there is no pain in this world that compares to the 'creeping death' that accompanies a nutshot, not childbirth, not passing a stone, nothing. I don't wanna hear it.

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angrymissy

10-03-2002, 01:14 PM

Once my boyfriend and I were lying in bed watching tv and i sort of rolled over him really fast to get outta bed, and as I rolled my knee went hard into his nuts. he was half blacked out and curled up in a ball whimpering for a good hour.

Getting punched in the tit really hurts too

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ADF

10-03-2002, 02:39 PM

One time Patrick Ewing Knicked me in the balls.

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TheMojoPin

10-03-2002, 07:57 PM

One time Patrick Ewing Knicked me in the balls.

Slowpoke.

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ToddEVF

10-03-2002, 08:03 PM

Every time men start talking about getting tagged in the pills, women gotta bring up the rack. Let me tell you something, there is no pain in this world that compares to the 'creeping death' that accompanies a nutshot, not childbirth, not passing a stone, nothing. I don't wanna hear it.

so i take it a nut shot is creeping death?

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blakjeezis

10-03-2002, 08:09 PM

so i take it a nut shot is creeping death?
No, the initial nutshot is its own special brand of pain. 'The Creeping Death' is the after pain. The dull, nagging, crampy ache that follows. So named because it starts low, and slowly creeps North into your abdomen. The worst.

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Aggie

10-04-2002, 05:38 AM

I've never done it, but I'm sure I'll run across a guy who deserves it one of these days...then I'll get my 'kinck' on.

They're they go again! Every time men start talking about getting tagged in the pills, women gotta bring up the rack. Let me tell you something, there is no pain in this world that compares to the 'creeping death' that accompanies a nutshot, not childbirth, not passing a stone, nothing. I don't wanna hear it.
I can imagine it hurts like hell, but one time I did something that was so painful and if I had balls, it would have been 10 times worse.

I was young, probably 10 or so and I had borrowed my older boy cousins bike, needless to say there is a bar on a guys bike and I was too short so my feet didn't touch the ground....wham! bar right in the tookie!...I could barely get off the bike and I was crying :( it hurt so bad.

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This message was edited by Aggie on 10-4-02 @ 4:41 PM

TheMojoPin

10-04-2002, 06:02 AM

Alright, this one is the worst nad story by far. Back in the seventh grade, my friend Clint decided he was going to clear this almost five-foot fence in a single jump. Well, he almost did. Too bad the fence was chain-link. *RIIIIIIIIIIIIIP* Poor bastard was airlifted to the hospital.

A man just isn't the same with one ball.

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Captain Rooster

10-04-2002, 12:36 PM

Ever try to sit on a bike seat the day after being nailed? It feels like somebody broke the end of a rake off and jammed the wooden shaft through your taint and out your stomach. Quite a happy li'l surprise to get "the morning after."

With that happy thought ...I'm out;)

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This message was edited by LTRooster on 10-4-02 @ 4:40 PM

BrianTheBailBondsman

10-04-2002, 12:42 PM

No but, I hopped on the bike and cruched my friggin' left one .. mannnnnnnn that hurt so bad i heard cow bells

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TheMojoPin

10-04-2002, 03:38 PM

I once lost control on my bike and hit a parked car. I twisted the handlebars to try and avoid the impact, but it was too late. Unforunately, the handlebars were still turned so that the right end was facing me, and that was what I went flying into. I cut myself so badly on the end of the handlebar that when I pulled away there was a big chunk of bloody flesh stuck wedged into the inside tube of the bar. That, and I of course landed right on the bar. But I think my balls slid to either side of it, so my taint took most of that impact.

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