Excuses to stay home sick

[cozmokramer]

I usually use prepare my coughs and complaints 3 days ahead. I've got sunday night it starts. Monday I hurt so bad at school. Tuesday I slip in a "I dont think I can go" but go anyway. Tuesday after school sleep the entire time. Wednesday...DAY OFF! What was your favorite excuse?

<img src="http://www.fezwatley.4t.com/images/clown.jpg">
<marquee>"Im open , theres just nothing inside" Jerry Seinfeld
POWER! POWER! DC POWER!</marquee>

[FUNKMAN]

i got a headache in my stomach...

i've got a temperature of 98 and a tan index of 9...

nah!

usualy just say "not feeling well" unless your really leaving the job shorthanded then it's "feeling really bad, nauseas and cold sweats"

i don't like to lie and say that "my kids are ill" if their not...i think it would be bad luck...

<img src="http://www.markfarner.com/2001tour/ribfest8_small.jpg">

[blakjeezis]

I forget who said it, but it's not originally mine. Diarrhea is the key to a day off. Call into work and tell them you have a wicked case of the shits. Go into as much detail, including frequency, color and consistency, as possible. Nobody will question it. In fact they'll be so horrified they'll get off the phone as soon as humanly possible, and you get a day for yourself.

<IMG SRC =http://ltrooster.homestead.com/files/sABRETOOTHsIG.jpg>
Thanks to LtRooster
"What was the middle one?" - Otto, A Fish Called Wanda
<marquee>White people are so scared of blakjeezis</marquee>

This message was edited by blakjeezis on 9-24-02 @ 12:35 AM

[A.J.]

Diarrhea is the key to a day off. Call into work and tell them you have a wicked case of the shits.


"Food poisoning" works as well.

<IMG SRC="http://www.silentspic.com/images/sighost/ajdcsig.jpg">

A Skidmark production.

[irishkb]

the Diarrhea thing works like a charm for my friend who is a correction officer.... i don't like to take days off unless i am really f-ing sick.. and at that point i just tell the truth and say i am fucking sick...

<IMG SRC=http://irishkb.50megs.com/images/akira1.gif>
another kb original...


"IM"-mick0306

[Green Lantern]

try a case of anthrax from a kamikaze cab driver.
Just like Bily

PAPA DON'T PREACH!!
<IMG SRC=" http://us.f1.yahoofs.com/users/ccc6a4b7/bc/My+Photos/GL30.gif?bcQz9i9AzBzKhK9l ">
TRUTH, JUSTICE AND THE AMERICAN WAY!!!
http://www.warrior-scholar.com

[SilentSpic]

I always use this one... had to much to drink the night before.

<center>
<font color="blue">A picture is worth a thousand words
<img src="http://www.silentspic.com/images/caughtsig.jpg">
"Brought to you courtesy of Aggie Productions" Flavorsaver
</center></font>

[philby]

thousands of people were my relatives and they all lived far away and I REALLY had to attend their funerals, etc

<img src=http://www.ltrooster.homestead.com/files/Philby.jpg>
sig pic ltrooster THANKS

[Death Metal Moe]

I'd come in but I don't like you.

<IMG SRC=http://unhallowed.com/sigs/MaskedEarth.gif>
www.unhallowed.com
<marquee>People's chioce: MOST VULGAR POSTER!! FUCK YEA!!</marquee>
SUPER CALLER #666!!!

[DC Reed]

fuck, you home sick to today? well atleast for me im a bit injured and have a legitamate reason.

Anyone ever just cough alot at night, then go tell your parents you threw up a few times even though you didnt that always does it. or say your going to bed at like 7:30, then they get worried and then at 9:00 pm say that you threw up or had explosive diarrhea.

<IMG SRC="http://www.silentspic.com/images/sighost/dolphinssig.jpg"

Thanks Aggie + Silent Spic!
<marquee behavoir=alternate>RonFez.net Secretary of State - "A Jailbait Studmuffin -Angel Amy" - Proud half of the Dolphins Fans on the board - Aggies bitch and key money maker</marquee>

[Rev]

I never tried it, but someone told me back in the day that if you ate a cigarette you'd raise your temperature, lol.

xoxoxo,
Rev

<IMG SRC="http://www.morphinebaby.com/stjames/revdefsigpic.gif">

[TheKnicks23]

A good one that always works for me is to eat a lot before dinner then not eat dinner and go lay on the couch. That one always seems to work for me.

<img src="http://www.fezwatley.4t.com/images/FINALGODFATHER.gif">

<font face="comic sans ms" color="#3300ff">SmackDown! Fan Since Day 1</font>
<font face="comic sans ms" color="#ff0000">Mario Fan Since Day 1</font>

[whale_JUNK]

pink eye, it's highly contagious. i haven't had it in years so i'm not sure how many days you could get.

Junge zum Verkauf !

[RandomNY]

I remember when I was in the 7th grade I faked having a fever 1 day before winter break( that was a Friday).. My mother let me stay home.. By Sunday a real fever kicked in and I had 103 fever and was truly sick for the next 2 weeks...

I decided to never fake it again.

I listen to much less WNEW than I used to!!!!

[SRFSTARVD]

Diarrehea is the perfect excuse. No one asks any question about it. They just give the look or have that uneasy sound in their voice. And that is it, sure they probably think nasty thoughts but whocares you now have the day off...sometimes 2 dont do anymore than 2 days though because they start to think you might have something seriously wrong and no one will come near you when you get back....not that I know or anything...

I know the pieces fit cause watch them fall away no fault none to blame doesnt mean I dont desire to point the finger blame the other watch the temple topple over...

[Michael Fury]

"I was up late watching the Mets"



So gimme a stage, where this bull here can rage
And though I can fight, I'd much rather recite
That's entertainment!

[Captain Rooster]

"I can't make it in. Would you believe that a girl named FrenchBreadPizza kicked me in the balls........repeatedly?"

<CENTER><img src=http://ltrooster.homestead.com/files/TalimanSig.jpg></center>
<center>Valhalla I am coming</center>

[whale_JUNK]

lucky you.

serenity now...insanity later <IMG SRC=http://wnewsgirl.homestead.com/files/Sigpic1.jpg>
Thank You Angel Amy

[reeshy]

I just usually crash my car and fax them the accident report!

<IMG SRC=http://www.destgulch.com/movies/platoon/plat02s.jpg>

[BrianTheBailBondsman]

I was 1 block away from the office but then i remembered i didnt lock my house so, i drove back home and went in to check if everything was all right. i locked the door , went to the car and realized i locked my keys in the house and couldnt unlock the car so i called roadside asistance but they told me it would be about 45 minutes.. so I went and got an early lunch ... then 2 hours went by and roadside still didnt show up so i waited then they finally called me back on my cell saying the were lost becouse they were sent from someplace about 90 minutes away.. just as i was about to tell them the directions my minutes ran out. and it was about 4:45pm so i figured wft no since in going in now... ( that was yesterday) but today i have to call out so the lock smith can repair the lock and door on my house 'couse i had to break-in and i found that the dog ate the keys... oh wait ... or was it the dog ate my homework? geez i'm so hooked on this posting thing i think i went from puberty to thwe working world and missed it all..ANYWAY can I have next tuesday off?

A Real Friend Wouldn't Bail You Out of Jail... His Ass Would Be in There WITH you!

[ToddEVF]

i either say i have a feeling something bad will happen, which i actually have a track record for
20-2, or i say i fell insane

<IMG SRC=http://members.aol.com/vikorynotvengnce/images/halloween.gif>
<Marquee>Toddevf just rocks that much he gets two appriciation threads, but whatever - DCReed/dint mean to come down on him earlier. . . I like Todd - Doogie76/And he supports my nicotine-fits - DynamiteK/But it's great to see the end result with Todd!!/Todd Rocks and has a HUGE cock. . . so I heard!!!! - Green Lantern/your the bestest, greatest, coolest todd! - Lulu/TODD EVF RULZ THE SCHOOL - NJDMMoe/I appreciate my Mini-Me! - RonFez Mark/I admire todd's ability to slyly and skillfully turn any and every thread into one about HIM - TheMojoPin</Marquee>

[fiestygal]

say your CRIMSON TIDE is extrememly heavy and you have cramps..

<IMG SRC="http://rfnetearth2ron.50megs.com/images/fiestygal.jpg">
this pic is thanx to E2R..I'll get off my SOAP BOX now!...
I am a goofball & swell to boot